Real Parents, Real Children: Parenting the Adopted Child [Paperback]

Holly Van Gulden (Author), Lisa M. Bartels-Rabb (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: September 1, 1995

Required reading for adoptive families, those considering adoption, or professionals in the field. This practical, informative book covers topics of vital importance to adoptive parents with sensitivity and insight. The authors bring years of experience to the complex emotional issues that parents will negotiate, and expert advice on establishing a healthy, loving parent-child relationship.

Editorial Reviews

From Library Journal

This title, which covers all aspects of adoption, argues that whatever happened, whenever it took place, and for whatever reasons, children in need of adoption have become separated from their birth parents and their genetic roots. Though writing for the adoptive parent, the authors have produced a book that will also be useful for professionals working with adoptive families. One fear among expectant parents is whether they and their child will be close. Adoptive parents ask, "Can I love an adopted child the same as I would a birth child?" Beginning with bonding of child to parent, the authors do a fine job on the developing child, covering early infancy through adolescence. Leading authority Van Gulden offers practical advice for parents on how to talk with their children about adoption and how to help them through the rougher times of growing up adopted. Highly recommended for academic and public libraries with strong reader interest in this area.
- Jan Wiedemann, Vernon, Tex.
Copyright 1993 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

From the Publisher

A leading authority on adoption and an award-winning writer bring wisdom and clarity to situations important to all adoptive parents. Real Parents, Real Children goes beyond the question of when to tell children they are adopted with practical advice for parents on how to talk with their children about adoption...

Throughout, the special concerns and challenges of interracial, international, and older-child adoptions are also addressed.

Real Parents, Real Children ... offers confidence and assurance as well as sought-after answers to lifelong questions.

Product Details

• Paperback: 288 pages
• Publisher: The Crossroad Publishing Company; 1 edition (September 1, 1995)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0824515145
• ISBN-13: 978-0824515140
• Product Dimensions: 9.1 x 6.1 x 0.8 inches
• Shipping Weight: 1.1 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 3.9 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (14 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #260,795 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

60 of 63 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Real Authors with Real Great Advice!, August 4, 2000

By A Customer

This review is from: Real Parents, Real Children: Parenting the Adopted Child (Paperback)

Real Parents, Real Children has been one of the most helpful books I have read on adoption, and as an adoption social worker - I have read quite a few! What I enjoyed most about this book was the in-depth look Holly Van Gulden and Lisa M. Bartels-Rabb took at each developmental stage in a child's life. After learning what all children go through at a particular stage, Van Gulden and Bartels-Rabb then discuss issues that may arise in each stage as related to adotpion. This book is a great resource for adoptive parents to determine if their child's behavior is due to their developmental stage or and adoption issue that needs to be resolved. Van Gulden and Bartels-Rabb do not end there! They go on to give practical advice on how to help your child through a tough issue. I appreciate this books honest and professional flavor. I recommend this book to all adoptive parents as a resource that can be used for many years. The earlier adoption related issues can be dicovered and worked through, the better for the child and the family. Two other books I highly recommend are "Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew" and "Making Sense of Adoption"

29 of 29 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars This book is a must if you are adopted or are going to adopt, April 13, 1999

By A Customer

This review is from: Real Parents, Real Children: Parenting the Adopted Child (Counselling titles) (Hardcover)

This book helped with my understanding of adopted children. As an adopted child I was able to understand the feelings I have been feeling all my life. it opened up communication with me and my parents. I would truly recommend this book to all people.

17 of 18 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Indispensable help for anyone adopting an older child..., November 28, 2004

By 

JB in MN (USA) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Real Parents, Real Children: Parenting the Adopted Child (Paperback)

I almost did not buy this book after reading a review that it was "too clinical." Thank heaven I went for it anyway. It was SO interesting and SO helpful, it has inspired me to write my first book review here on Amazon. I have read every book I can get my hands on since I adopted a 4-year-old from another country and this was by far the most useful to me. While it also covers adoption of infants and domestic adoption, Van Gulden delves deeply into adoption of older (more than a year old), international/interracial children and the issues they face. I especially like how - after each chapter - she gives a list of other resources/books to consult for more information. There are great suggestions of children's books that will help you approach most any difficult topic that can - and will - come up with your new child. I am back here shopping for more copies tonight - get a copy for grandma/grandpa and anyone else close to you who may need a little education on the unique intricacies of adopting an older child from another culture or race. I am so grateful to have found this book and highly recommend it. Adoption is one of life's richest blessings - and most worthy challenges. This book will help you appreciate and cope and know that you are not alone.