Reasonable People: A Memoir of Autism and Adoption: On the Meaning of Family and the Politics of Neurological Difference [Hardcover]

Ralph James Savarese (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: May 17, 2007

A testament to uncommon devotion and common possibilities.

"Why would someone adopt a badly abused, nonspeaking, six-year-old from foster care?" So the author was asked at the outset of his adoption-as-a-first-resort adventure. Part love story, part political manifesto about "living with conviction in a cynical time," the memoir traces the development of DJ, a boy written off as profoundly retarded and now, six years later, earning all "A's" at a regular school. Neither a typical saga of autism nor simply a challenge to expert opinion, Reasonable People illuminates the belated emergence of a self in language. And it does so using DJ's own words, expressed through the once discredited but now resurgent technique of facilitated communication. In this emotional page-turner, DJ reconnects with the sister from whom he was separated, begins to type independently, and explores his experience of disability, poverty, abandonment, and sexual abuse. "Try to remember my life," he says on his talking computer, and remember he does in the most extraordinarily perceptive and lyrical way.

Asking difficult questions about the nature of family, the demise of social obligation, and the meaning of neurological difference, Savarese argues for a reasonable commitment to human possibility and caring.

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Savarese, a writer and professor at Grinnell College, writes a moving account of his family's adoption of DJ, an abused, autistic youngster. Throughout, he describes the process of helping DJ communicate with the world and discusses larger issues of the rights of people with neurological differences. Savarese's wife, an autism professional, first encountered DJ when he was only two and a half; by the time they could adopt him, three years later, he'd lived in several homes and been badly abused in foster care. Because he didn't speak, people were unaware of what he'd suffered; some doubted he even could suffer, believing the myth that the autistic have no sense of self or others. As the Savareses worked with their son, teaching him to sign and to use "facilitated communication" with a keyboard, they learned more about his very deep thoughts and feelings. As they fought to include him in mainstream classrooms, they also struggled with his emerging demons: his memories of abuse, his pain from parental abandonment. Savarese writes with passion and humor, careful to include extensive excerpts from DJ's typing, so readers get a sense of his remarkable growth. (May)
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

From Booklist

By his own admission, Grinnell professor Savarese never wanted to have children, which makes his memoir of his and wife Emily's autistic adopted son, DJ, all the more poetic a demonstration of achieving much more than one thinks one can. This applies as much to DJ, whom Emily met while she was assistant director of a center for autism and related disabilities, as it does to the Savareses. At two and one-half, DJ couldn't talk, he perseverated (repeated actions), and was generally unresponsive. Worse, he had been neglected, abused, and abandoned when his birth parents and several foster parents wrote him off as too much to handle. Armed with clear principles on how children with autism ought to be cared for, Emily and Ralph started to work with DJ, eventually adopting him. Their road together continues to be rough, but today the preteen boy attends mainstream classes and, as the final, in-his-own-words chapter confirms, possesses marvelous perceptive and communicative skills. Savarese's careful melding of memoir and passionate advocacy for the disabled informs and inspires. Donna Chavez
Copyright © American Library Association. All rights reserved

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Product Details

• Hardcover: 496 pages
• Publisher: Other Press; annotated edition edition (May 17, 2007)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1590511298
• ISBN-13: 978-1590511299
• Product Dimensions: 6.5 x 1.4 x 9.2 inches
• Shipping Weight: 1.6 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.9 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (17 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #236,832 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

13 of 13 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Something for Everybody, May 26, 2007

By 

Michael Cavanagh "hard to please" (Grinnell, IA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Reasonable People: A Memoir of Autism and Adoption: On the Meaning of Family and the Politics of Neurological Difference (Hardcover)

I must declare an interest. Savarese is a faculty colleague of mine. I wouldn't normally write an Amazon review of a colleague's work, but this book is so compelling and inspiring that in the past week since I finished it I have all but stopped strangers on the street to tell about it. There are several reasons to read it. It is a well-informed, thought-provoking and very specific book about autism, of special interest to readers like me who knew about autism only from a distance. It is a close-up and very frank story of an unusual and admirable family. It is (as one of your reviewers put it) an adventure story whose subject is the discovery of a mind and soul and the emergence of a young man into the world. Yet one comes to feel that it is also about all of us. Best of all, it's a great read, a real page-turner, with a novel's power to keep you up until midnight asking youself "what next?"

12 of 12 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars A Book About All of Us, May 7, 2007

By 

Gregory Pierce (Chicago, IL) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Reasonable People: A Memoir of Autism and Adoption: On the Meaning of Family and the Politics of Neurological Difference (Hardcover)

Yes, this is a book about autism and adoption, but it is also a book about all of us. It is about how we stereotype others, about how we give up on others, about how we love or don't love others. It is also beautifully and delightfully written by a literature professor who is passionate about his subject and knows how to tell a good story. I was amazed how vulnerable this family allowed itself to become in order to let the rest of us know what autism is really about and to challenge healthcare professionals to take another look at what they are doing to "treat" it. One thing for sure, I'll never look at an autistic person again without thinking about D.J. and the Savareses.

10 of 10 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars An Amazing Story, May 4, 2007

By 

Rob Barget - See all my reviews

This review is from: Reasonable People: A Memoir of Autism and Adoption: On the Meaning of Family and the Politics of Neurological Difference (Hardcover)

This is by far the best writing on autism I have ever read. The story is so fascinating; it unfolds like a mystery or an adventure novel. There is no self-pity just a really well written description of a boy who is able to struggle (really struggle) towards communication and inclusion (after a brutally abusive early childhood) with the help of his very human, but unbelievably dedicated parents. This not just another earnest book about overcoming disability. It is so eye-opening AND so much fun to read. The last chapter will blow you away.