Customer Reviews

Recovery from Abusive Groups

5 star:		(5)
4 star:		(2)
3 star:		(0)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(3)

 

 

This book is an excellent guide to recovery from cult life from one who's been there. It's amazing how much ground there is to cover on this subject, and the author covers it well. If you've been in an abusive group (or want to help someone who has), this is an instructive and enlightening guide to getting over it and moving on.

Wendy Wolfberg's book is exceptionally practical, unique among books addressing the subject matter of recovery from abusive groups. Some of Ms. Wolfberg's insights apply to other crisis-driven situations, as well as the more specific recovery from cults and other abusive groups. Not only the ex-cultist but also his or her family can be greatly aided in the recovery process by reading this book; it is in a format which is easily "digested" and comprehensible to the individual in crisis (whether the individual is the ex-cultist or a family member).

Wendy Ford's book, Recovery from Abusive Groups, is practical experience from a sensitive and intelligent person who at a vulnerable place in life was recruited into an abusive group. The book isin a "workbook" format which has been successfully used for other books in the field of recovery from traumatic abuse or neglect. The book helped me when I was in a similar place in life. I had just broken free from an abusive group myself and needed all the support I could get. For anyone who has survived a traumatic experience, it is important to connect with and seek the support of other people who have "been there." Wendy's book is positive, survivor-friendly, and full of immediately practical suggestions on how to become free from the controlling influence of a group like a cult. It is intended for the survivor who is already out of the cult. It is in a different category from Steve Hassan's well-known book, Combating Cult Mind Control. Steve's book, while based upon firsthand traumatic experience in a cult, is geared more for the counselor than for the survivor, although it certainly has a lot to recommend it if one is a cult survivor. Wendy's book is different because it is a deeply personal reflection on the profound impact of destructive groups upon everyday people who were vulnerable and were seduced by the apparent security and ready answers provided by a cult. Cult abuse, or abuse in any "high demand" group, cuts deeply into the mind and emotions of the victim. There are millions of people in cults in the USA alone. It is hard to describe the hopeless, trapped feeling of being in a group where each day is a new low of suffering under unreasonable and often directly harmful treatment by persons in charge one was led to trust wholeheartedly. It is hard to climb out of a cult alone. Some people never make it out. For those who do, returning to non-cult living can be traumatic in itself. Wendy's book is affirmative and supportive. I can imagine this book would be especially helpful for those many people who do not have access to therapeutic counseling. The book is both heart-rending and heart-mending. I hope people will read it, if only to appreciate the deeply disturbing experience of undergoing the frightening experience of an abusive group.

I've translated this book in Russian four years ago and use it with great success in counseling former cult members and their relatives. Wendy Wolfberg's book is clear and well guiding. It is apparently that only readers without knowledge of cults or abusive relations or with pro-cult position can reject a value of this book.

I read Wendy's book after having an experience of being in a cult, and found it extremely helpful. Those who have very recently exited a destructive group will find it more helpful than perhaps those who have been out of the group for some time, or for someone looking for research material. I encourage anyone who is struggling for normalcy after this challenging time period to read "Recovery from Abusive Groups"

Not only is this book chock full of vital information, helpful perspective, and sensible guidance...it's written in a form that a person most needing it can absorb. That is, it can be read in the small chunks that make immediate sense to someone whose attention span and mental processing are impaired by the mental abuse of cults and other authoritarian situations. The information is presented clearly and simply, and divided into neat categories so the reader can address just as much or as little as he is able to take in at any given time. Exitting an abusive group is overwhelming, and this book neatly addresses every facet of recovery and empowers the reader to address areas that would otherwise silently haunt him. So many cult recovery books are written from the perspective of psychological distance...this one unmistakeably comes from someone who understands the process from the inside. It was one of the two most valuable resources in my own recovery. I recommend it to anyone coming out of an abusive group or relationship, and to any caring friend or family member of such a person.

Book Review

Recovery from Abusive Groups. Wendy Ford. American Family Foundation, Bonita Springs, FL, 1993, 106 pages, paperback.

Author Wendy Ford has straightforwardly and thoughtfully presented her understanding of recovery issues from a personal perspective of having participated in an abusive group and from a well-studied psychological and sociological perspective. Her articulation is concise, yet encompasses a range of emotions and perceptions regarding the seemingly never-ending adjustment process to postcult life.

Throughout the pages of the book, the author's honesty and insight concerning difficult and complex issues are apparent, together with the evidence of her personal travels along the road of recovery and renewal. This is a handbook for every former member and their families who choose to be informed about mind control and therefore aid in combatting the growing problem of psychological abuse by destructive cults. This open and challenging review of the recovery process helps the reader begin to address some very complex and emotionally loaded issues. It is a road map for those of us who need to reintegrate our lives after the trauma of separation from such an intense experience and the realization of having been subjected to such an extensive level of deceit.

Ms. Ford clearly allows for the perspective of the individual survivor as well as the family. Her approach to the recovery process gives attention to the systems one is connected to: the family and our culture. She boldly addresses the challenges ex-cult members face in evaluating the cultic experience and learning about the world around them. Her tools for reality checking and for developing critical thinking skills help deal with several residual effects experienced by those who had a mind- control experience. The author also addresses the varying emotions former members will confront and learn about in a whole new way as free human beings.

In this book the former member is given permission to heal and recover from what is properly referred to as a trauma. The recovery process from high-demand abusive groups is multifaceted and contains the seed for renewal, if former members are patient and compassionate with themselves. Each page has hope peaking through; this book speaks to former members' need to know that there is life after what they once thought was the "truth."

In addition, Ms. Ford addresses the needs and struggles of the victim's family and loved ones. In the process of recovering from trauma, the former member is challenged to review every life connection. Much attention is focused on family of origin and the strengths and weaknesses that impacted the cult member's coping strategies and initial vulnerability to the cult. Having the family members' support and willingness to discuss family issues can be helpful in assisting the entire family to regain an equilibrium. This handbook also offers practical suggestions in facilitating both personal and familial healing.

As stated on page 1, recovery takes time, discipline, and courage. The road to renewal and reintegration takes many forms, but persistence is the main ingredient. Recovery from Abusive Groups speaks directly to those hurting and confused, and gives assurance, direction, and insight regarding a wide spectrum of life issues that former members are challenged to confront. This book is refreshing and inspiring, and expresses the strength and wisdom of one who has survived and thrived. By including thorough and thought-provoking study questions and a bibliography that has personally inspired and assisted her throughout her journey, Ms. Ford has remained true to her constant reminder to "Do your homework!"

My recommendation comes with the true bias of a friend who has been fortunate to know Wendy since a year after I left the same group she was in. She had been out three years when we were introduced and one of the most valuable lessons we have learned together is this: Recovery and renewal from an abusive group cannot happen in isolation. Her book brings the reader into the footsteps of her life, as she considers and discusses the many aspects of recovering from the abuse and trauma of a destructive cult group. The reader is able to sigh, cry, and smile at the straightforwardness and courage of the author's presentation.

Former members and families are fortunate to have such a workable and informative handbook which addresses this complex issue of cults and recovery from the residual effects of mind control. Each day I become more and more convinced that our misfortune can truly be turned around and reconfigured to work in our favor. I invite you to discover this from Wendy Ford's courageous book. Lee Anne Pellegrini, M.S.W. Intern Boston University

I found this book a complete disappointment. Not only due to the poor literary skills, but for the lack of content. It's clear that the first review made here on this dated book felt the same. The author obviously felt it necessary to defend her sad effort by writing numerous reviews on the book all on Valentine's day 2001. Clearly the result of her loneliness and lack of love since the book has been out since May of 1993, and she mysteriously gets all these great reviews in one day shortly after the bad review... which is ironic since it was the only review ever posted here.

I see the only "abuse" here is trying to get people to believe this is worth buying with false promotion. My copy was returned, therefore, I "recovered" my money.

Basically it's the result of someone so lost in their life that they needed a new form of attention. Why I bought this is beyond me. I was doing research on cult experiences and the only thing I got out of this is that the writer seems like a permanent little girl. It's like Harry Potter meets Helen Keller. Save your money!

Not only is this book a bunch of crock full of vented information, unfocused perspective, and senseless gibberish...it's written in a form that any person can ignore. That is, if read, you will blow small chunks and make you immediately sick of someone whose attention span and mental processing are impaired by the mental abuse of cauliflower and other vegetation. The information is presented foggy and soggy, and divided into numb categories so the reader can address just as much or as little as he is able to throw up at any given time. Exciting, this useless book is not, and this book always addresses every faucet of Britney Spears records and emplodes the reader to address areas that would otherwise silently hate him. So many cult recovery books are written from the perspective of psychological experience...this one unmistakeably comes from someone who understands the process of making money from it. It was one of the two most valuable resources in their own recovery. I do not recommend it to anyone as they clearly needed a group and lack relationships, and any caring friend or family member would disown such a person.