Customer Reviews

The Reformed Vampire Support Group

5 star:		(8)
4 star:		(8)
3 star:		(3)
2 star:		(3)
1 star:		(1)

 

 

I really hate to give this book three stars, because in many ways, it was excellent. Jinks has created vampire characters with severe limitations and obstacles to overcome, and she sticks to the rules she writes. I find this admirable, because a lot of authors like to wriggle their characters out of difficulties and into happiness with a little tweaking of their world's internal logic. Not so with Catherine Jinks. Her vampires fall unconscious instantly at sunrise and stay unconcious until sundown--no matter what they're doing, and no matter how much recap is required to explain all the action they've missed. Her vampires are weak and constantly nauseated (don't read this book with a sore stomach), so that walking up three flights of stairs can wipe them out completely. This drastically limits any action that might have taken place, so the pace is pretty slow.

The vampires are so weak, miserable, and limited that RVSG would be completely depressing if not for the general snarkiness of the main character. Nina has been surrounded by insufferable people for the past thirty years, and she's nearly reached her breaking point. I liked her, but she wasn't quite snarky enough to make this book consistently funny, and the world was so fully realized that the book didn't feel much like a satire either. I ended up feeling so sorry for the vampires that I couldn't really enjoy myself at their expense.

(I realize that this is pretty subjective, actually. Others might find the decrepitude of the vampires absolutely hilarious. I can speak only for myself in this regard.)

RVSG makes a great break from tales of traditional vampires who are rich, powerful, and gorgeous, but I'd have to say that (if done well) the traditional vampires are more fun to read about. Give this book a try, because it's imaginative and original, but don't expect a rollicking good time.

I was rewarding myself for having such a productive week when I bought this and boy oh boy is this a swell treat.

From the first page I was caught. No, not just by the clever turn of phrase and the hilarious lives these vampires lead, that's a given. I read Evil Genius and loved it too. No, it's the careful way that the characters are revealed and the absurd things they have to do to survive.

The plot is pure gold; Imagine going to a support group for thirty years. Thirty years of seeing and listening to the same small group of people talking about their problems. Now add to that someone who is permanantly in the body of a 15yr old and is the beneficiary of peptalks and advice about her situation; "you are in the denial stage of vampirism, etc."

At it's heart this is a mystery. In the grand tradition of mysteries (at least the ones I like), the heroine has several handicaps, not the least of which is that she lives at home with her mother and cant go outside during the day. She spends her time writing vampire adventure stories.

I don't want to give anything away, truly this is a book to be savored (I devoured it in two days, what can I say, I have no self control).

I'm not swearing Catherine Jinks wrote The Reformed Vampire Support Group as a parody of the Twilight universe. I'm just calling it as I see it. If you hate Twilight, chances are you'll love this book. And if you're Twi-obsessed, well, then, I'll give you a 60% possibility of enjoyment. Consider it Twilight on a bad LSD trip.

What's different you ask? Hmm. Well . . . imagine your mom as a vampire. The mom you know and love and shudder at when she walks around at seven in the morning in curlers and a hair-net, smoking like a moldy hay-stack and ever-complaining about her over-sized goiter. Except rather than a bottle of gin in hand, she's drinking blood.

Weird, right? That's what I'm talking about. No Edwardian sparkles, no super-human strength, no poetic tangents professing the passionate need to resist the smell of the wine barrel, and definitely no Greek god-like physiques going on.

The vampires in this universe never age, but their physical bodies do (or more specific--their physical ailments do). Toenails fall off and stay off, and one's breath is always bad. Add to that the issue of their being terrified of driving, choking, being killed, or interacting with human society on any level and you begin to get the general idea. They hide out in their homes watching TV re-runs and drinking the blood of guinea pigs (which they breed, mind you), attending their once-a-week "I promise to be ashamed of what I am" support group. Thus it is that when one of the members of The Reformed Vampire Support Group gets staked and winds up as a "pile of cat litter" in the bottom of his coffin . . . well, uh . . . maybe you should just read it.

Summary: In Nina Harrison's world, vampires don't sparkle. They aren't the handsome vamps we met in Twilight. They're dead. Fanged at age fifteen in 1973, Nina has to attend weekly meetings of the Reformed Vampire Support Group. Sure, she enjoys Dave, a teen who was in a rock band before his untimely death, but the same can't be said for the meetings. That's when one of the members turns up dead and Nina, Dave, and co. go on the adventure of a lifetime searching for the killer.

Thoughts: I liked this cute little story. Over the course of the first few chapters, Nina, our first person narrator, tells us the truth behind all the common vampire legends, everything from the garlic to the rumor that all vampires live in luxurious mansions. In Catherine Jinks' world, vampires drink guinea pig blood and do, well, almost nothing for eternity. It was sweet and a punch in the face to Twilight. I, for one, liked that.

Characters: Nina was loveable, unlike several other female narrators in this YA genre. They can be Mary Sues, complete jerks, or just plain flat *cough*Bella*cough*, but Nina made me smile. I also enjoyed Dave's character, a distant love intrest. However, it seems like none of the other vamps were all that fleshed out, merely place holders and stick figures. They all could have been staked and I barely would have cared. As for the humans, they just didn't seem to get enough spotlight time for me honestly to get to know and love them. I would have loved to see a bit more of all the humans in this story.

Appropriateness: There was one big action scene close to the end. Not exactly graphic, more suspenseful than anything. Some mild language, but no f-bombs, and not much of the words they do use. No sexual scenes or dialogue.

Will I read it again?: Maybe. It wasn't astounding in any way, shape, or form, but it met all my expectations for the book.

Closing thoughts: Not for fans of Twilight. It gives vampires a bad name, so if you're Twilight obssessed, you might want to think twice. If you hate Twilight, it's the perfect snarky and sarcastic story for you.

"Vampires are meant to be so glamorous and powerful, but I'm here to inform you that being a vampire is nothing like that. Not one bit. On the contrary, it's like being stuck indoors with the flu watching daytime television, forever and ever." - Nina Harrison in The Reformed Vampire Support Group

I know what you're thinking. Vampires, they're beautiful, right? They're super fast, super strong. They even smell good. Hah! Think again. Vampires are pasty, pale and rail thin. They're feeble, easily tired, prone to headaches and they throw up a lot. They're weak - well, at least all of the vampires that Nina Harrison knows are. She was fanged at fifteen and for the last thirty odd years she's been a member of the Reformed Vampire Support Group. If there's a more pathetic collection of vampires anywhere on earth, Nina does NOTwant to meet them. Heck, she wishes she didn't have to spend any more time with the dull and depressing vampires she already knows. She does, of course. Every Tuesday night at support group meetings, probably for the rest of her unnatural existence.

Excitement comes into the dreary undeaths of the support group members in a most unlikely and unwanted form. When one of their members doesn't answer his door one Tuesday night, the group is horrified to discover he's been staked - and shot with a solid silver bullet. No one is mourning Casimir Kucynski, not exactly. He was responsible, directly or indirectly, for infecting every last member of the group. Still, no one wished him dead. And a vigilante slayer is a danger to all vampires, especially since he's been in Casimir's apartment and might have seen Casimir's address book.

Following the trail of the unusual silver bullet - the only lead the support group has - is going to take some of them far outside their comfort zone in suburban Sydney. Since the first likely suspect is more than a day's drive away, Father Ramon - the support group's human facilitator - will have to lead the 'away team,' if only to deal with the daylight hours. Considering she has steadily bemoaned the general weakness and uselessness of vampires, Nina feels pretty much compelled to volunteer for the road trip. Dave, the only vampire Nina actively likes (and not just because he was in a punk band before he got fanged), completes the unlikely trio that sets out to find Casimir's killer. Before they're done hunting, the support group is going to encounter all manner of dangers. If they can just work up enough energy to save themselves, everything will work out fine.

With the Twilight, Vampire Academy, House of Night crowd constantly clamoring for more vampire books, it's not altogether surprising that a counter collection of novels - satirical stories that purport to show vampires 'as they really are' - has also found a steady market. Most of the time, these 'other vampire' books are poorly written and uninteresting. That is definitely not the case with The Reformed Vampire Support Group. Nina's weary, snarky voice is the perfect antidote to the earnest, tremulous narration of romantic vampire stories. The Reformed Vampire Support Group is clever and well crafted and Ms. Jinks's slick prose had me laughing out loud. I'll never be able to look at a guinea pig the same way again.

I was a tad disappointed that The Reformed Vampire Support Group wasn't as good a read as I'd had hoped.. that being said, it wasn't without charm. I did enjoy the writing and the characters for the most part, but it wasn't one of those books that you just cant put down. It's definitely a unique take on the vampire genre and is done with a bit of tongue and cheek. I think where the book really failed to grip me, is in that it didn't truly commit. Although C. Jinks uses smart-alecky humor through the voice of Nina, (the main character/narrator) the 'funny" just isn't consistent or strong enough to allow the reader to completely overcome how week and pathetic the vamps are. Thus you are left feeling sorry of them and little depressed. Overall it was an okay read.. Am I sorry I took the time to read it?.. No. Is it one that I'd pick up and read again?.. No.

Title: The Reformed Vampire Support Group by Catherine Jinks

Pages: 362.

Time spent on the "to read" shelf: 0 days.

Days spent reading it: 4 days.

Why I read it: I was drawn to the cover (I know, I know). But I was also interested in reading another book by Catherine Jinks that sounded interesting, but it was quite a bit longer. I figured I'd try out her writing to see if I liked it with the shorter book.

Brief review: The Reformed Vampire Support Group was a pleasant read. It was not the greatest book I ever read, but it was fairly original, told as a fun narrative, and full of great sarcasm and wit. I enjoyed reading it.

The story is a blend of comedy (filled with Vampires who don't drink human blood, instead they fang hamsters), mystery (a vampire is killed in the first few chapters, who killed him and why drives the story), and vampire lore (they DO sleep during the daylight hours, but they are not super-strong or particularly cool). I liked how it blended vampire lore and at the same time tried to make its own lore. Jinks wrote this book with some great twists on who vampires are and what they do.

There were a few parts of the story that bothered me. The storytelling gets interrupted by the fact that the vampires sleep during the day. At two points the vampire telling the story from a first person point of view has to shift to a narrative role to recount what happened during the day. I found these shifts awkward, and not as well written as the rest of the novel. Also, the first half chapter of the book is written from a 3rd person P.O.V. but then it shifts to a 1st person, I did not understand why Jinks did not just start from the 1st person. But these are minor flaws in what I thought was a great story. Worth reading if you want a quick, light read that makes fun of the vampire genre more than anything else. As a youth pastor, I also thought there were some great points made in the book about resisting temptation, walking according to the flesh, and overcoming with the help of strong community. But that was just my take on some of the themes in the book. Interesting to me, maybe not to other people.

All in all, The Reformed Vampire Support Group will deliver some chuckles, gives a fun story, and was worth reading. I'm sure a sequel will come out if this book is even slightly successful. There were plenty of fun characters to work with and their quirkiness is worth exploring in additional books. This is one book that didn't suck. (I couldn't help myself! I needed one great vampire pun).

Favorite quote: "If being a vampire were easy, there wouldn't have to be a Reformed Vampire Support Group." (there were a lot of funny passages and dialogue, but I could not find any of them that made sense alone when trying to make this review, so you get this little gem)

Stars: 4.5 out of 5.

Final Word: Fangtastic.

I have to say I really wanted to like this book. And that seems to be the consensus with the other reviews. The motley crew on the cover made me want to read this book instantly and the description on the inside of the jacket was very interesting.

However the plot was awful. It was very slow-moving with little to nothing happening each chapter. All the characters just moan about not wanting to do anything, and the author didn't make it seem that dire to find out who the killer was anyway, which at that point, why write this book, since that was the plot of the story.

In addition the characters themselves were very boring, and I really didn't even care how they all came to be vampires. Non-traditional vampires, not as entertaining as I had hoped. If you can help it, do not get sucked in by the great artwork done on the cover and pass on "The Reformed Vampire Support Group".

If certain bestselling novels and hit movies are to be believed, vampires are passionate, glamorous, romantic and downright sexy. Not so, says Nina Harrison, the narrator of Catherine Jinks' dark comedy, THE REFORMED VAMPIRE SUPPORT GROUP. Nina, who has been a vampire since she was "fanged" at age 15, may write her own series of bestselling novels starring sexy vampire Zadia Bloodstone. However, in real life, Nina and her group of vampire "friends" (a term Nina herself would probably reject) are anything but glamorous or desirable.

Instead, life with Nina and her companions is a lot like an AA meeting. In fact, the loose-knit group of vampires meets regularly at a church in their native Sydney, Australia, in meetings overseen by a (human) priest. (It turns out, by the way, that the whole thing about vampires despising crosses and garlic was a bit of an exaggeration.) Being a vampire, we find out, is kind of like being an alcoholic. The vampires effectively have an infection that's impossible to cure but possible to control, mainly by using willpower to overcome their desire for human blood and by fanging small animals (in their case, guinea pigs) and taking enzymes that mimic those in human blood.

Nina still lives at home with her mother (who's now in her 70s), and she socializes by necessity with the other reformed vampires in her group. The only one she is at all fond of is fellow teenaged vampire Dave, a sensitive but moody soul who she likes in spite of herself. Nina can take or leave the other vampires, especially Casimir, the creepy instigator of the group. But when Casimir is staked through the heart and shot with a silver bullet, the Reformed Vampire Support Group must figure out which modern-day Van Helsing was out to get him --- and which of the other vampires might be the next target.

Obviously, Nina's dysfunctional, unattractive vampire posse of losers and creeps is meant to be a deliberate alternative to smoothly slick vampires in other novels. Jinks' book is also a clever send-up of society's fringe elements --- just like criminals, prostitutes and addicts, the vampires lurk around the city after dark, keeping to themselves because they might endanger (or be endangered by) others.

In addition to being a witty satire and a clever murder mystery with a most unusual set of detectives, THE REFORMED VAMPIRE SUPPORT GROUP is also very, very funny, whether you happen to be a fan of vampire novels or not: "Horace...had arrayed himself in a Gothic assortment of crushed velvet, black satin, and patent leather that shouldn't be allowed, in my view. He might as well have had I AM A VAMPIRE embroidered across the front of his watered-silk waistcoat. An outfit like that is going to get him staked one of these days; it's exactly what Boris Karloff would have worn, if he'd joined the cast of The Rocky Horror Picture Show." In passages like this, Nina's snarky, spot-on narration will win her fans, even if she's not the kind of vampire that gets all the good press.

--- Reviewed by Norah Piehl

I wanted something light to read because seriously between The Iliad, The Odyssey and Dante's Inferno, an English Lit major could get depressed. So, I picked this book up having read the back and thought it was a clever concept. It turns out; it's a great book, and awesome take on vampires. I'm not into the new way of looking at vampires as being sexy, and Jinks does a great job making the undead more realistic, yet in a humorous way. I recommend this book, it is good fun and well written.