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Rejected: Tales of the Failed, Dumped, and Canceled [Paperback]

various (Author), Jon Friedman (Editor)
3.9 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (9 customer reviews)

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Book Description

January 27, 2009
Besides being born and dying, the most common human experience is being rejected–dissed, dumped on, or downsized–by lovers, parents, and employers. Now here’s a hilarious collection of rejection stories–and rejected works–by some of today’s most accomplished comic writers and performers (some world famous) sharing their pieces that were ripped to pieces and their own experiences of being handed their hats, heads, and hearts on a platter.

• Bob Witfong recalls being hired as a correspondent by The Daily Show but never called in to work; then being fired by mistake; then going on air and called “creepy” by bloggers; and then actually being fired.

• Meredith Hoffa has her pubescent crush destroyed by a new haircut modeled on Mary Stuart Masterson’s in Some Kind of Wonderful just when “the size of my face and body had caught up to the gigantic size of my teeth.”

• Joel Stein (celebrity interviewer for Time) receives an earful from Buddy Hackett who, before slamming down the phone, says: “You’re being kind of, what do you call it, I don’t know, those wise-guy papers? Tabloids.”

• Dave Hill offers his piece for a British “lad” mag in which he went undercover with a police vice squad, an article killed because he didn’t go “far enough” with a transvestite prostitute.

• Jackie Cohen fails her audition for the synagogue choir–at age five.

• And many more too painful to mention.

Featuring essays, jokes, sketches, cartoons, and articles passed on by venues as varied as Saturday Night Live and Reader’s Digest, Rejected is a priceless compilation that reminds us it’s a-okay to be a big loser.

Praise for Rejected
"In this comic anthology of short essays, rejection veteran Friedman (creator of popular New York reading series "The Rejection Show") brings together a double-handful of writers and comics (Michael Ian Black, Neal Pollack, Mandy Stadtmiller, David Rees, Tom McCaffrey, Kristen Schaal) to share rejected work and their thoughts on it. The criterion for entry is an unpublished piece that has been rejected at least once; rejecting parties range from the New Yorker to television's Saturday Night Live to the perfect boyfriend to the suddenly silent agent. Entries include sketches abandoned by members of TV's The State to spectacular bachelor party failures to small, triumphant moments of rejection rejection (for one actress, hope makes a comeback at the local Pottery Barn).The overall quality of the work is remarkable; Friedman allows his writers immense latitude in style and substance while keeping his theme front and center. Though a bit New York-centric, the collection has something for everyone, laughs on just about every page, and an ultimately uplifting spirit; if every rejection is an opportunity, then the chance to be a part of this fine, funny collaboration was probably worth it—especially for readers. --Publisher's Weekly

“No one has ever made being a reject this funny! If you read only one book this year about being a total loser, make it this one.”
–Lizz Winstead, founding member of Air America Radio and co-creator of The Daily Show

“This book shows that we are truly living in bizarro world where the rejected should be the accepted and the accepted should be . . . anyway, this is an awesome and wonderfully comedic book.”
–Jonathan Ames, author of The Alcoholic

“I’d like to thank the contributors for their humiliation, pain and suffering, because it sure makes for a funny book.”
–A.J. Jacobs, author of The Year of Living Biblically

Frequently Bought Together

Customers buy this book with Six-Word Memoirs on Love and Heartbreak: by Writers Famous and Obscure $8.00

Rejected: Tales of the Failed, Dumped, and Canceled + Six-Word Memoirs on Love and Heartbreak: by Writers Famous and Obscure


Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

In this comic anthology of short essays, rejection veteran Friedman (creator of popular New York reading series "The Rejection Show") brings together a double-handful of writers and comics (Michael Ian Black, Neal Pollack, Mandy Stadtmiller, David Rees, Tom McCaffrey, Kristen Schaal) to share rejected work and their thoughts on it. The criterion for entry is an unpublished piece that has been rejected at least once; rejecting parties range from the New Yorker to television's Saturday Night Live to the perfect boyfriend to the suddenly silent agent. Entries include sketches abandoned by members of TV's The State to spectacular bachelor party failures to small, triumphant moments of rejection rejection (for one actress, hope makes a comeback at the local Pottery Barn).The overall quality of the work is remarkable; Friedman allows his writers immense latitude in style and substance while keeping his theme front and center. Though a bit New York-centric, the collection has something for everyone, laughs on just about every page, and an ultimately uplifting spirit; if every rejection is an opportunity, then the chance to be a part of this fine, funny collaboration was probably worth it-especially for readers.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

From School Library Journal

Adult/High School—Reveling in failure is the order of the day in this collection of essays. Some pieces are about relationships, as in Sarah Schaefer's "Jared," which describes a love affair and traumatizing breakup, conducted strictly via 11th-grade note writing. Others involve poor career choices, such as Kristen Schaal's account of time spent as a lackluster pink-haired, pink-sunglasses-wearing Miss Peppermint Twist in the F.A.O. Schwartz Sweet Shop. And many of the contributors describe creative endeavors that for one reason or another didn't quite make the cut. These are the meat of the collection, as a who's who in comedy share the work they forced themselves to do to make ends meet, thought they could pull off for easy cash, wasn't timely enough, or wasn't funny. Members of The Kids in the Hall get booed off stage and fistfight on, and writers from SNL's Weekend Update, The State, and The Onion, among many others, share snicker-inducing bits that perished in production or under an editor's red pen. For the mass amount of denial found here, Rejected is surprisingly lighthearted and inspiring. There's something satisfying in unearthing seriously cringe-worthy work or memories of some of the best and the brightest in comedy. There's also relief in realizing that some quality endeavors were simply in the wrong place at the wrong time. Teens will check out this one for its star contributors and their humor, and appreciate it for its realism and sincerity.—Shannon Peterson, Kitsap Regional Library, WA
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

Product Details

  • Paperback: 252 pages
  • Publisher: Villard; First Edition edition (January 27, 2009)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0345500962
  • ISBN-13: 978-0345500960
  • Product Dimensions: 5.2 x 0.6 x 8 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 4.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 3.9 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (9 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,018,444 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

ANNABELLE GURWITCH is an actress and writer, known for her years co-hosting Dinner and a Movie on TBS and her Fired! book and documentary film. She's been a regular commentator on NPR and columnist for The Nation.com. Currently, she hosts the series WA$TED on Planet Green Network. You Say Tomato, I Say Shut Up... a love story is her second book and second marriage.

JEFF KAHN won an Emmy award for his writing on the Ben Stiller Show. As an actor, he has appeared in The 40-Year Old Virgin and Tropic Thunder, as well as the HBO series Curb Your Enthusiasm and Entourage. Tomato is his first book and this is first marriage.

Annabelle and Jeff live in Los Angeles with their twelve year old son Ezra.

They developed this book through a series of performances at Upright Citizens Brigade, Comedy Central Theatre and The New York Comedy Festival 2009. They still can't decide if performing together counts as "date night".
You can see their videos and tour information at www.yousaytomatoisayshutup.com

 

Customer Reviews

9 Reviews
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Average Customer Review
3.9 out of 5 stars (9 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Uplifted by Rejection, February 2, 2009
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This review is from: Rejected: Tales of the Failed, Dumped, and Canceled (Paperback)
I LOVED this book. There was so much I could relate to and somehow found the experience of reading it to be uplifting, encouraging and so very funny. I heartily recommend Rejected to anyone who has been turned down, cast aside, brokenhearted or enjoys a good laugh. It was unique and terrific...but it NOW!
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Awesome book!, January 29, 2009
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This review is from: Rejected: Tales of the Failed, Dumped, and Canceled (Paperback)
Loaded with fun great stories! Great variety too. If you buy it and don't like it you can personally reject it and return it! But you won't. It's a great read...
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1 of 2 people found the following review helpful:
3.0 out of 5 stars Hit and miss, October 7, 2009
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Amazon Verified Purchase(What's this?)
This review is from: Rejected: Tales of the Failed, Dumped, and Canceled (Paperback)
John Friedman runs a show in New York called The Rejection Show, which celebrates the all-too-common experience of not succeeding. This book is a collection of some material from that show, various writers, comedians, actors and cartoonists reflecting on their favorite rejections.

Overall, the material in all over the place. Some of it, honestly, should have been rejected. Other pieces have moments of laugh-out-loud humor. Neil Pollack's short story, "Brother Elk," is a pretty solid short story. And both the collection of rejected headlines from The Onion and rejected jokes from Saturday Night Live's "Weekend Update" both have some hilarious lines. But in general, the bigger the bomb, the better the comedy. And that goes to Kevin McDonald's recounting of a show his comedy troupe did at El Macombo rock club. It ends with the audience hurling homophobic insults (their act followed a gay men's choir) and two of the performers getting into a fistfight on stage.

I recently heard an interview with John Friedman, and perhaps better than anything in this book were some of his insights on what it means to fail and, in this case, what it means to celebrate failure. By looking at his failures as something to be collected, as positives in that regard, he gave himself the freedom he needed to really take some creative risks. Although not as funny, thoughts on the nature of rejection itself would have given this book a little more heft.
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Inside This Book (learn more)
Key Phrases - Statistically Improbable Phrases (SIPs): (learn more)
cartoon limbo, gay choir, fetish club
Key Phrases - Capitalized Phrases (CAPs): (learn more)
New York, The Daily Show, Gary Numan, Marie Claire, Kevin Spacey, Los Angeles, Jon Stewart, Comedy Central, Buddy Hackett, Vladimir Putin, Brother Elk, Elks Lodge, Billy Crystal, Stephen Colbert, Pear Carver, Comedy Arts Festival, Bill Clinton, Upright Citizens Brigade Theatre, East Side, Pottery Barn, Dick Van Patten, Jim From James Potts, New Jersey, Sexy Man
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