Relational Intelligence: How Leaders Can Expand Their Influence Through a New Way of Being Smart (Jossey-Bass Leadership Network Series) [Hardcover]

Steve Saccone (Author)

Book Description

ISBN-10: 047043869X | ISBN-13: 978-0470438695 | Publication Date: September 15, 2009 | Edition: 1

An insightful and practical guide for developing relational leadership skills and engaging new paradigms of influence

Relational Intelligence reveals how leaders can become smarter in the way they conduct their relationships, and as a result, catalyze their impact.  This book unwraps the hidden power of a relational genius and the practical pursuits that contribute to increasing one's relational quotient (RQ).  Steve Saccone offers thought-provoking and compelling pathways into understanding the synergistic effect of relational intelligence,  mission, and influence.  He demonstrates how critical the art of relational intelligence is for leaders who desire to better serve those they lead, as well as the organizations and communities they love.

• Offers practical wisdom, engaging anecdotes, and compelling stories that show leaders how to develop relational intelligence
• Delineates the essential skills that make leaders relationally intelligent
• Unwraps six roles of a relational genius and how these transform our approaches to influence
• Includes Foreword by Erwin Raphael McManus
• A new book in the popular Leadership Network Series

The author reveals how to increase one's awareness of the nuances in relational dynamics and suggests ways to help navigate relationships more intelligently and productively.

Editorial Reviews

From the Inside Flap

RI

Relational Intelligence (RI) reminds us that the way we choose to relate to one another determines the quality of our human experience and reveals what we value most. If we took a panoramic view of humanity, we'd discover that human relationships unfortunately are often reduced to a commodity, as if people were buying, selling, and trading relationships for personal benefit. This book challenges leaders to no longer see people as a means to an end but to approach people with relational intelligence.

In this book, thought leader, relational intelligence practitioner, and professor Steve Saccone defines the six roles of a relational genius and why they're essential for the relationally intelligent leader. These life-changing principles can be applied both to church leadership and any other leadership context.

While many leaders want to be relationally intelligent, they struggle to understand what it means and how to implement it. Saccone defines RI in a clear and provocative way: "Relational" in RI means learning to see people as the highest value and conveying that to them. The "Intelligent" part of RI means learning effective interpersonal skills and then applying them in ways that expand influence.

Many leaders long to be influential and missional but, mistakenly, this pursuit is often at the cost of valuing people. When leaders get the relational part right (loving well), and combine it with the intelligence part (applying effective interpersonal skills), their impact will be far-reaching, and even immeasurable.

As a result of becoming relationally intelligent, the world will become not only a smarter place, but a more human one. This is the world Jesus envisions, where love and mission intersect—a world that can only become a reality if we begin to live—and lead with—this new way of being smart.

About Leadership Network

The mission of Leadership Network identifies and connects innovative church leaders, providing them with resources in the form of new ideas, people, and tools. Contact Leadership Network at www.leadnet.org.

From the Back Cover

With a Foreword by Erwin Raphael McManus

RI

Relational Intelligence

Steve Saccone

How Leaders Can Expand Their Influence Through a New Way of Being Smart

"If you've ever wondered why smart leaders do dumb things, this is the book for you. Steve unpacks the dynamics that make leaders most effective—as well as most joyful. You probably don't need this information yourself, but read it anyway. You'll think of lots of people who do need it."
—John Ortberg, best-selling author and senior pastor, Menlo Park Presbyterian Church

"Steve Saccone . . . is not merely a theorist, but a practitioner that I greatly admire as I have seen in action what he writes about. Relational Intelligence is thought provoking and most of all practical. Leadership of any form is about people and communication and Steve ingeniously addresses both."
—Dan Kimball, author, They Like Jesus But Not The Church, and pastor, Vintage Faith Church

"Wow! You cannot read Relational Intelligence and not be challenged, empowered, and equipped. This book has it all, and every leader must read it!"
—Princess Kasune Zulu, advocate and activist for HIV and AIDS;

World Vision spokeswoman; world-renowned speaker; and author, Warrior Princess

"If anyone is qualified to write on Relational Intelligence it's Steve Saccone. You'll have a new friend by the time you're done reading this book."
—Mark Batterson, best-selling author and lead pastor, National Community Church

"Steve Saccone . . . .point[s] to issues in our inner and outer worlds that significantly shape our influence as leaders. For those of us who value leading through relationship, this book is a wise investment."
—Nancy Ortberg, consultant and founding partner, Teamworx2, an affiliate for Table Group (A Patrick Lencioni Company)

"Curiosity got me started in this book; great insight kept me reading; transformation has me planning on reading it again! Steve Saccone takes the mystery out of 'how to' when it comes to influencing others . . . .Brilliant stuff!"
—Ed Gungor, New York Times best-selling author, There's More to the Secret

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Hardcover: 224 pages
• Publisher: Jossey-Bass; 1 edition (September 15, 2009)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 047043869X
• ISBN-13: 978-0470438695
• Product Dimensions: 6.4 x 0.9 x 9.2 inches
• Shipping Weight: 11.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (12 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #75,359 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Steve Saccone serves as a Regional Catalyst with The Leadership Connection in Los Angeles, California. He continues to be a pioneer in leadership development, as he founded Protégé, a 2-year global leadership program designed for future entrepreneurs, church planters, and spiritual leaders. In addition, he has worked as a Field Advisor for the Gallup Organization, Consultant for Monvee, as well as serving as a Gallup Strengths Performance Coach. He has a Masters Degree in Transformational Leadership and serves as adjunct professor for multiple graduate schools. He lives in Los Angeles with his wife Cheri and 2 sons, Hudson and Holden.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

14 of 14 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars There is a little Michael Scott in all of us!, October 15, 2009

By 

Scott E. Savage (Phoenix, AZ) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Relational Intelligence: How Leaders Can Expand Their Influence Through a New Way of Being Smart (Jossey-Bass Leadership Network Series) (Hardcover)

I received Steve Saccone's book from a friend unexpectedly. I had listened to Steve via the Mosaic Podcast and at the Awaken Conference. He serves in LA as a part of Mosaic, where he develops young leaders and some of my friends have worked under his leadership.

This is Steve's first book and it speaks into an often unexplored area of leadership. Steve begins with the reality that many leaders accomplish their goals at the cost of their relationships with those they lead. A leader can show productivity, passion, imagination, and resourcefulness, but he or she can be relationally dumb in interacting with others. I have so many experiences with leaders in the church that knew the Bible well and had seminary degrees but lacked basic people skills that made their work difficult.

Some of my favorite nuggets from the book:
-In the past, authority and credibility were built on status, power or position, but in today's world it's built on power and trust. To be relationally intelligent, we must shift from a positional authority mind-set to the crucial mind-set of relational authority.
-Leaders treat people as a commodity. (OUCH!)
-When we love people well, we become the proof of God.
-Many leaders deflect responsibility and accountability instead of
absorbing it.
-We all have a little bit of Michael Scott in us.
-To be a person is to have a story to tell. (Isak Dinesen)
-If we want to be relational geniuses, we must learn to capitalize on moment's when we see people's values being lived out.

I could list so many great ideas here, but I think Steve makes his goal possible here by the content and context of this book. I think you and I can become more sensitive to our intuition and more aware of the people around us. I think we can develop new habits that are reflective of core values that remind us to value the people we are serving with, not just the task we are bound together in. In this process, "leaders realize that the more people they bring with them, the more powerful the effect they can have on changing the future and making the world a better place."

As the African proverb states, <strong>"If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, bring others with you."</strong>

Great book, Steve!

5 of 5 people found the following review helpful:

3.0 out of 5 stars Passionate, Inspiring, But is it Biblical?, December 28, 2010

By 

Angela Hampton (Austin, Texas) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Relational Intelligence: How Leaders Can Expand Their Influence Through a New Way of Being Smart (Jossey-Bass Leadership Network Series) (Hardcover)

"Ri" addresses how to be relationally "smart". Saccone called it the new smart--which I'm not sure that it is all that new--and goes into guiding you through his thoughts on what Ri looks like and how to develop it in yourself and others. The first half of the book talked a lot about being relationally intelligent, giving many examples related to presenting to groups or large audiences, which could be particularly helpful to leaders who do public speaking. The questions that he suggested you ask yourself to help gage how emotionally present you are prepared to be included questions related to your heart, mind, soul, and strength. I found the questions to be very helpful just to keep a person on track, whether they are trying to be a leader or more relationally intelligent or if they just want a closer walk with God. The chapter about not being a boring person was funny, not because he intended it to be, but because he went on too long and became redundant--and boring. Amusingly, that is the only place in the book where he did that. As a whole the book is very engaging and I could read his passion for leadership throughout. However, I did have a significant departure from agreement in ch. 8, Disproportianate Investor, because he instructs leaders to choose carefully who they "invest" their time in and bases it on Jesus' calling of the disciples. I've read the Bible and don't recall it saying anything about Jesus' selection process, instead it seemed to focus on their willingness. When Jesus said to the guys in the boat, follow me. They went immediately. Jesus told some to not even go bury their dead or say good-bye to their families. Yet they came. It seemed like it was more about the followers willingness to take leaps of faith than it was about Jesus saying, "I'll take this one, not that one." In addition, as someone who taught intermediate grades for ten years in public schools I saw many students make significant changes in their lives, not because of my great leadership, but because for many years teachers had poured love, time, heaps of patience, and guidance on them. So when Saccone said to avoid "investing in" people who have a "consumerist mentality" I couldn't disagree more. Lastly, his choice of terms to avoid "consumerist mentalities" and "diproportionately invest in" people to me reaked of contradiction steeped in a business mentality that seems to be popular in education and churches these days, but I don't see where it is Biblical. If I could visit with Saccone personally, I would recommend Henri Nouwen's book In the Name of Jesus. Nouwen's ambitions and achievements as a leader were challenged when he was charged to "lead" a people that didn't care who he was or who endorsed his latest book. And although they weren't necessarily going to go on to lead a "proportionately" large number of people themselves, he found that these people "lead" him into a better understanding of what it means to "lead" others in the name of Jesus.

5 of 5 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Yet another form of intelligence, December 4, 2009

By 

John Gibbs (Melbourne, Australia) - See all my reviews
(TOP 1000 REVIEWER)    (REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Relational Intelligence: How Leaders Can Expand Their Influence Through a New Way of Being Smart (Jossey-Bass Leadership Network Series) (Hardcover)

People with high IQs are not necessarily good at relating to other people, because inter-personal relationships require a different form of intelligence. There has been much recent literature about emotional intelligence; now Steve Saccone has written a book about Relational Intelligence, with a matching test available on the website [...]

According to Steve, there are six defining roles of a relational genius. The Story Collector is someone who can draw out other people's stories. The Energy Carrier knows how to enliven the mood in a room. The Compelling Relator knows how to get people interested. The Conversational Futurist knows how to use a conversation to create change. The Likeable Hero establishes authentic connections that make people feel valued. The Disproportionate Investor invests time and resources into a few carefully chosen people.

It seems to me that the online self-assessment, while thought-provoking, suffers from a problem common to many self-assessment tests: the relationally unintelligent person is likely to rate himself too highly, and thereby achieve a higher score than he deserves, because he is unaware of his own deficiencies. Nonetheless, the book provides interesting insights and should be useful for most people who have leadership responsibilities in a church.