Relational Shifts: A Family Doesn't Have to End Just Because a Marriage Does [Paperback]

Julie Rappaport (Author), Lee Liberman (Author), Tasha Liberman (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: March 30, 2007

A Family Doesn't Have to End Just Because a Marriage Does... A divorced couple and their daughter each give their personal perspective, entwined with social commentary, on the current trend of divorce

Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Julie Patrice Rappaport, Lee Liberman and Tasha Liberman, as a family, have written this book to share their story with anyone seeking to create a life-changing shift with as little pain as possible as well astheir own catharsis. There is an episodic series being created as a sister production, as well as a resource website for families going through their shifts. Check out: www.relationalshifts.com or www.smokinyogi.com to see the trailers, look up resourceful links or share your own insprirational story of a family using the shift to better itself. Lee is a partner with his father and brother in an international closeout wholesale business, enjoys his new Harley Davidson and shopping. Tasha loves senior high, la crosse and dancing. Julie teaches Yoga, does bodywork, dances, and is now an author and producer, and almost a college graduate!

Product Details

• Paperback: 206 pages
• Publisher: BookSurge Publishing; 1st edition (March 30, 2007)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1419664646
• ISBN-13: 978-1419664649
• Product Dimensions: 8.9 x 6 x 0.8 inches
• Shipping Weight: 11.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (7 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #469,579 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Opposites Chafe One Another, Lose Integrity, and Become Best Friends After Divorce, September 19, 2007

By 

Donald Mitchell "Jesus Loves You!" (Thanks for Providing My Reviews over 109,000 Helpful Votes Globally) - See all my reviews
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This review is from: Relational Shifts: A Family Doesn't Have to End Just Because a Marriage Does (Paperback)

In these days of reality television, I thought I was immune to shock. Wrong. This book about how divorces happen and how to respond to them shocked and surprised me in so many ways that I had to step back and think about what I had read before having any idea of how to review this book. This reaction occurred despite having gone through a divorce many years ago. In fact, if the personal story parts of this book had been portrayed as a novel, I would probably have complained that the book was unrealistic.

The book's format is an unusual one that I can only characterize for you as "She felt and said; He felt and said; Their Daughter felt and said; and Lessons drawn heavily from Buddhist thought." The level of candor is extraordinary. There doesn't seem to be much that happened to these three people that they won't relate to you.

What's the basic point? I would paraphrase the book's advice as being to approach marriage as a way to live with personal integrity while adapting the relationship to match the needs of the moment and the long term.

Julie Rappaport and Lee Liberman got into trouble with their marriage because they didn't know each other very well before marrying. They also didn't spend enough time discussing what kind of a marriage they wanted. Julie wanted to try her wings and Lee wanted a traditional wife. The couple also experienced sexual issues that are apparently more common than I was aware of. They both ended up feeling like they were giving away parts of their personal identities to be in the marriage, yet they loved the other person. Becoming parents was similarly haphazard, although they are both devoted parents. Unlike many people who divorce, they clearly did their best to put their daughter's interests first.

Even though Julie soon remarried, the three continued to function as a family after divorce . . . celebrating family events, taking vacations, and covering for each other. I thought this aspect of the book was potentially the most valuable for those who are considering divorce: You can divorce and still have a good relationship with your former spouse.

Where the book is weakest is as a guide for planning for marriage and building a strong marriage. While the questions are certainly good ones, they aren't nearly enough to help those who are in the throes of passion and a new marriage to think through what needs to be thought through. As I read the material about how each spouse felt like they couldn't be themselves in the marriage, I was reminded of a neighbor whose husband left her after 30 years of marriage commenting that he was tired of not being able to be himself. I suspect that complaint is fairly common. I know that my favorite compliment about my wife is that she lets me be myself.

But independent of the book's advice, it's riveting reading. I couldn't put it down.

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Brave and Uplifting, June 8, 2007

By 

Heidi Wilensky (Atlanta, GA USA) - See all my reviews
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This review is from: Relational Shifts: A Family Doesn't Have to End Just Because a Marriage Does (Paperback)

This is a story told with brave honesty and deep love. While their story is certainly unique, I would imagine most families can relate to many parts of their experience. It should give people that are going through relational shifts a sense of hope and a new perspective on the possible outcomes of these shifts. Julie, Lee and Tasha face adversity with humor and hope and are an inspiration to those who want to heal and grow with their experiences.

5.0 out of 5 stars Fantastically written book about relational shifts!, July 24, 2008

By 

Tiffany Conner "Tiffany" (Hayward, WI USA) - See all my reviews
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This review is from: Relational Shifts: A Family Doesn't Have to End Just Because a Marriage Does (Paperback)

Though I have not experienced divorce (or marriage for that matter), I found myself relating to Relational Shifts. Recently, I lost a loved one unexpectedly. My family is still feeling the effects of that loss. "Relational Shifts" gave me insight and allowed me to see families in an entirely new way.