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The Relationship Cure: A 5 Step Guide to Strengthening Your Marriage, Family, and Friendships
 
 
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The Relationship Cure: A 5 Step Guide to Strengthening Your Marriage, Family, and Friendships (Paperback)

by John Gottman (Author) "A work team at one of Seattle's floundering Internet companies has a problem that's common in many workplaces: They can't communicate with their boss..." (more)
Key Phrases: emotion log, emotional command systems, life overstimulates, Energy Czar, Forest Side, Emotional Communication Game (more...)
4.5 out of 5 stars See all reviews (20 customer reviews)

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Editorial Reviews

Review
"John Gottman is our leading explorer of the inner world of relationships. In The Relationship Cure, he has found gold once again. This book shows how the simplest, nearly invisible gestures of care and attention hold the key to successful relationships with those we love and work with."
-- William J. Doherty, Ph.D., author of Take Back Your Marriage: Sticking Together in a World That Pulls Us Apart

"This is the best book on relationships I have ever read -- a truly impressive tour-de-force. John Gottman has discovered the Rosetta Stone of relationships. He has decoded the subtle secrets contained in our moment-to-moment communications. By introducing the simple yet amazingly powerful concept of the "bid," he provides a remarkable set of tools for relationship repair. By the middle of the second chapter you're likely to say to yourself, "Oh, so that's what's happening in my relationship with my partner (or colleague, boss, or sister), and now I know what to do about it."
-- Daniel B. Wile, Ph.D.,author of After the Fight: Using Your Disagreements to Build a Stronger Relationship

"The Relationship Cure is another in John Gottman's superb series of books on improving intimate relationships. What distinguishes Gottman's writing from that of other self-help books is that it is based on research findings from his extensive studies. When he says his five steps will help you build better connections with the people you care about, you know that they have been demonstrated to work."
-- E. Mavis Hetherington, Ph.D., professor of psychology, University of Virginia

"The Relationship Cure is both profound and practical, based on decades of research and clinical experience. The rich array of self-exploration exercises and guidelines offers a life-changing program for creating more rewarding emotional connections with friends, colleagues, and life partners."
-- Shirley P. Glass, ABPP, author of Treating the Trauma of Infidelity

"The Relationship Cure is engaging and imaginative. The deceptively simple but powerful concept of the 'emotional bid' reveals ways in which we can connect with significant others in our lives."
-- Andrew Christensen, Ph.D., coauthor of Reconcilable Differences


"I always expect to learn something from John Gottman, and I have never been disappointed. The Relationship Cure is original, insightful, and immensely helpful. I love the concept of emotional bids. Gottman not only helps the reader recognize how he or she may be short circuiting connection and communication, he gives them very good practical advice, as well as examples of wrong and right ways to deal with even the most aggressive or passive partner interaction."
-- Pepper Schwartz, Profesor of Sociology, the University of Washington, Seattle and author of Everything You Know About Love and Sex is Wrong


From the Hardcover edition. -- Review

Review
"John Gottman is our leading explorer of the inner world of relationships. In The Relationship Cure, he has found gold once again. This book shows how the simplest, nearly invisible gestures of care and attention hold the key to successful relationships with those we love and work with."
-- William J. Doherty, Ph.D., author of Take Back Your Marriage: Sticking Together in a World That Pulls Us Apart

"This is the best book on relationships I have ever read -- a truly impressive tour-de-force. John Gottman has discovered the Rosetta Stone of relationships. He has decoded the subtle secrets contained in our moment-to-moment communications. By introducing the simple yet amazingly powerful concept of the "bid," he provides a remarkable set of tools for relationship repair. By the middle of the second chapter you're likely to say to yourself, "Oh, so that's what's happening in my relationship with my partner (or colleague, boss, or sister), and now I know what to do about it."
-- Daniel B. Wile, Ph.D.,author of After the Fight: Using Your Disagreements to Build a Stronger Relationship

"The Relationship Cure is another in John Gottman's superb series of books on improving intimate relationships. What distinguishes Gottman's writing from that of other self-help books is that it is based on research findings from his extensive studies. When he says his five steps will help you build better connections with the people you care about, you know that they have been demonstrated to work."
-- E. Mavis Hetherington, Ph.D., professor of psychology, University of Virginia

"The Relationship Cure is both profound and practical, based on decades of research and clinical experience. The rich array of self-exploration exercises and guidelines offers a life-changing program for creating more rewarding emotional connections with friends, colleagues, and life partners."
-- Shirley P. Glass, ABPP, author of Treating the Trauma of Infidelity

"The Relationship Cure is engaging and imaginative. The deceptively simple but powerful concept of the 'emotional bid' reveals ways in which we can connect with significant others in our lives."
-- Andrew Christensen, Ph.D., coauthor of Reconcilable Differences


"I always expect to learn something from John Gottman, and I have never been disappointed. The Relationship Cure is original, insightful, and immensely helpful. I love the concept of emotional bids. Gottman not only helps the reader recognize how he or she may be short circuiting connection and communication, he gives them very good practical advice, as well as examples of wrong and right ways to deal with even the most aggressive or passive partner interaction."
-- Pepper Schwartz, Profesor of Sociology, the University of Washington, Seattle and author of Everything You Know About Love and Sex is Wrong


From the Hardcover edition.

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

  • Paperback: 336 pages
  • Publisher: Three Rivers Press (June 25, 2002)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0609809539
  • ISBN-13: 978-0609809532
  • Product Dimensions: 8 x 5.2 x 0.8 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 8.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars See all reviews (20 customer reviews)
  • Amazon.com Sales Rank: #3,008 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

    Popular in these categories: (What's this?)

    #3 in  Books > Parenting & Families > Parenting > Emotions & Feelings
    #25 in  Books > Health, Mind & Body > Relationships > Marriage
    #39 in  Books > Parenting & Families > Family Relationships

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Customer Reviews

20 Reviews
5 star:
 (15)
4 star:
 (3)
3 star:    (0)
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Average Customer Review
4.5 out of 5 stars (20 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

 
19 of 19 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars excellent, very insightful!, January 15, 2007
Read this book and share it with your partner if you can. It is so spot-on about communication, I really wish everyone would read it! The basic premise is explaining how we relate to each other and what happens when we don't respond in a way that potentiates that relationship. It's easy to understand, a great read. I especially recommend it if you are in a relationship that is not going well and BOTH of you are looking for help in fixing it. Read it together. It will help you understand each other. (I only wish it wasn't called The Relationship Cure because it's really about Communication!)
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21 of 22 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars best communication book I've ever read, January 11, 2007
By Janee Gillette (Salt lake City, Utah) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
I work in Family Practice and Urgent Care as a physician assistant and do most of the 'psych' in our clinic. My background is in counseling psychology as well. I consider this book the most thorough, useful and appropriate 'communications skills' self-help book I have ever read. I recommend it to my patients and friends constantly. Janee Gillette, PA-C
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71 of 85 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent advice on relationships!, October 10, 2003
By A Customer
John Gottman, one of the leading authorities on relationships has produced another fantastic book on this subject. In this book he explains the basic elements of "people skills". It gives us concrete ideas about what it takes and how we can develop them. He uses information from many of his own research projects to explain the concepts and processes involved to understand the ways we interact with each other. I must admit that although my relationships were not the best until recently, this book has helped me improve these relationships quite dramatically. If you'd like to read an even more comprehensive explanation on how relationships work, read "The Ever-Transcending Spirit" by Toru Sato. It is also an outstanding book on relationships as well as adult (and childhood) development. Two thumbs up for both books!!!
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Most Recent Customer Reviews

5.0 out of 5 stars Need help?
This is a book that everyone should read whether entering a new relationship or trying to get along in an older one. Great advice.
Published 1 month ago by S. Coleman

5.0 out of 5 stars Three Relationship Keys
Evaluate all of your relationships, self and others from these three simple perspectives: (1) Turning Against--those who criticize; (2) Turning Away--those who do not engage... Read more
Published 2 months ago by Dr. Wayne S.

5.0 out of 5 stars Gotta get this book!
This book is excellent no matter what relationship you are working on, or if you are just trying to understand how people relate to one another. Read more
Published 3 months ago by Cindy Thomson

1.0 out of 5 stars Found it difficult to read. Couldn't get past first page
It doesn't read like a novel for sure. As a buyer with an obvious need, I was looking an answer from the first page. Read more
Published 4 months ago by Foo Chi Hian

5.0 out of 5 stars The Key to Relationship Success
I first learned of John Gottmah, PhD when I heard him speak in Seattle with H.H. the Dalai Lama earlier this year. Read more
Published 6 months ago by Cheryl D.

1.0 out of 5 stars Got tired of the male bashing.
The author might try to appeal to men a little more.

Any family therapist knows that rule #1 is "Do not take sides. Read more
Published 9 months ago by Salvador Minuchin

5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent Book
I think this book has some very good insights for a variety of situations. I bought it more for some personal issues, but it has some lessons that seem just as effective in the... Read more
Published 9 months ago by Sandy Feet

5.0 out of 5 stars Life-changing strategies!
This book has altered the course of my life. I whole-heartedly recommend it to anyone who would like to improve their relationships with their spouse, parents, siblings,... Read more
Published 10 months ago by C. Bottrell

5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent book
John Gottman's books always have some good advice, and this one is no exception. I find his research very interesting and useful. Read more
Published 10 months ago by Sarah

5.0 out of 5 stars Great book with lots of practical exercises
This book contains a lot of practical information about all types of relationships. It will help you to become more aware of how you function in relationships and why. Read more
Published 11 months ago by Donna M. Sterrick

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