Customer Reviews

The DNA of Relationships for Couples (Smalley Franchise Products)

5 star:		(14)
4 star:		(1)
3 star:		(0)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

I have been watching, listening to, and reading information about marriage for many years. Never before have I gotten so lost in a marriage book that I hated to put it down. In DNA for Couples the lost art of story-telling is found. As you read about the lives of these other couples, you will find yourself understanding your own relationship better. It feels like the authors have taken the subject of marriage out of the classroom and put it into the living room where it belongs. Just when I thought every marriage book was going to be a revamping of all the others, I waded into this one and realized that there are new ideas and better ways to present them. What a breath of fresh air. You've gotta give this one a try. It is amazing!

I read "The DNA of Relationships" by Dr. Gary Smalley. The information was so exciting that I have incorporated into my conversational repoire with my family, friends, and work colleagues. "The DNA of Relationships for Couples" by Dr. Greg Smalley and Dr. Robert Paul is no less intriguing. Whether married or single, I would place both of these books on a "must read" basis. I have enjoyed a satisfying marriage for 25 years, but I now understand the delicate relational balance needed for a mutually blessed marriage for both partners.

I've read many, many marriage books, but none has compared to the depth, wisdom, hope and authenticity of this book. Because of the expertly woven stories, I identified with each couple's struggles. I cheered when they realized where they'd gotten off track and I cringed as I saw myself in their desperation. And through it all, I learned amazing truths about myself, my God and my marriage.

Everywhere I go, I hear about the impact of this book and the principles within. If you're struggling in your marriage, longing to see relational health, I highly recommend picking up a copy of this book. Dr. Bob Paul and Dr. Greg Smalley's proven and surprising insight will, if you let it, revolutionize the way you interact with and love your spouse.

Very useful ideas, very powerful book. I enjoyed getting a "fly on the wall" perspective on what group couples' counseling might look like -- makes for an engaging read, which is a refreshing change from many self-help books.

In a lot of ways, the best-fitting program for a marriage that's in trouble probably depends on what the core problems are. Gary Chapman's "The Five Love Languages" is a great book, but probably more helpful for marriage enrichment than for marriages in crisis. Willard Harley's "His Needs, Her Needs" and related materials can be for enrichment or a marriage in crisis. (Harley's work is very good too!) "The DNA of Relationships for Couples" speaks to marriages in crisis -- and while the messages would be helpful for marriage enrichment too, the stories are about marriages that are in significant distress. I'm not sure how I would respond to the book if I were in the midst of a marriage that was rolling merrily along.

The ideas about the Fear Dance, as well as scriptural mandates for self-care were very thought provoking and eye-opening for me. It's a scripturally-guided perspective that comes at marriage from a perspective I really did not expect. Instead of talking about endlessly sacrificial love, they do a good job of pointing out where "sacrificial" runs the risk of turning into "doormat." They make a good case for valuing oneself as a child of God, and setting appropriate, God-honoring boundaries in relationships when needed. They also do a nice job of emphasizing the importance of personal responsibility in marriage. The doormat message was one I personally needed to hear, and that makes the DNA book a very good fit for me.

Because this book is written as if you are in an actual intensive marriage counseling session with several couples, you get a real feel for what it would be like. Therefore, if you are a Christian counselor or if you are considering this type of Christian counseling with Dr. Paul and Dr. Smalley, this book is a must-read. You can go to their website to find out more. It will even tell you when the next available time and place are and how to sign up.

http://www.nationalmarriage.com/aboutus.asp

I enjoyed reading the comments made to the couples as they discussed their problems (ranging from giving up on a long-term marriage to adultery). I found many of the therapists' comments unexpected and refreshing. It helped the couples to look at their situations differently, and gave them hope. Being in a group with other couples felt awkward to the participants in the beginning, but turned out to be very beneficial to each of them - a sort of positive peer pressure. The continuing sessions over a short-period of time (rather than short sessions over a long period of time) helped reveal personality traits and made it more difficult to hide emotions.

Obviously the DNA of Relationships principles were applied. But you will need to get their other book to have the principles spelled out. I did not read the other book first and still got a wealth of information out of this book.

I have absolute confidence that following the principles and guidelines in this book will save your relationship! I would also recommend The DNA of Relationships by the same authors. They are both packed full of valuable insight into what really makes a relationship work. Through years of research and speaking with thousands of couples, the Smalley family and their associates seem to have found the secret to success. Not only can you improve your communication, you can learn to be thrilled with your relationship. They don't have a magic wand to wave that fixes everyone's problems, but they are able to provide a path to follow that can only lead to success. Thank you to Bob and Greg for helping to improve my quality of life and renew our hope for the future!

My small group from church is going through this book and it has really given us some practical tools to apply to our marriage. A lot of books out there give you very encouraging things, but not real techniques to use everyday. If you take this book to heart and really practice the tools with your spouse it can take your marriage from good to great. My husband and I have found this book so helpful and has made our marriage so much more enjoyable.

At 80 & 83 we found this book extremely helpful.
Married 57 years and still growing. ZP

Great book. The authors have done a terrific job including stories involving couples to whom most if not all couples can relate in some manner. This book has real life to it, and concrete applications that couples can follow to bring healing to their relationship. I am hoping to reread this with my wife, and hope to revisit it again every few years.

THis is a great book and should be read by people with or without relationship problems..... THe book goes through several scenarios of relationships gone wrong.... and while it may not address your specific issue, one can easily glean the information needed......