A Relentless Hope: Surviving the Storm of Teen Depression (Paperback)

~ Gary E. Nelson (Author)
Key Phrases: wedding dinner, afflicted teen, depressed teen, The Hurler, Other Things, Wrestling Holds (more...)

Editorial Reviews

Product Description

Depression and related illnesses threaten to wreck the lives of many teens and their families. Suicide driven by these illnesses is one of the top killers of these young people. How do teens become depressed? What does depression feel like? How can we identify it? What helps depressed teens? What hurts them? How do families cope with teen depression?

In A Relentless Hope Gary Nelson uses his experience as a pastor and pastoral counselor to guide the reader through an exploration of these and many other questions about teen depression. Nelson has worked with many teens over the years offering help to those who find themselves confronted by this potentially devastating attacker. The author also uses the story of his own son's journey through depression to weave together insights into the spiritual, emotional, cognitive, biological, and relational dimensions of teen depression. Through careful analysis, candid self-revelation, practical advice, and even humor, this pastor, counselor, and father reminds us that God's light of healing can shine through the darkness of depression and offer hope. A Relentless Hope is written for teens, parents, teachers, pastors, and any who walk with the afflicted through this valley of the shadow of death.

About the Author

Gary E. Nelson, DMin, is a United Methodist minister who for thirty years has worked with teens and their families as a local church pastor and as a pastoral counselor. He currently pastors a church in West Virginia.

Product Details

• Paperback: 137 pages
• Publisher: Wipf & Stock Publishers (May 15, 2007)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 155635309X
• ISBN-13: 978-1556353093
• Product Dimensions: 8.8 x 5.8 x 0.4 inches
• Shipping Weight: 6.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.9 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (13 customer reviews)
• Amazon.com Sales Rank: #262,165 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

8 of 8 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Wow!, October 23, 2007

By	Wits'End (jacksonville fl) - See all my reviews

I ordered this book when I was at my wits' end. Our son has been suffering from deep depression and anxiety following a traumatic beating two years ago and has experienced rages, school refusal, and some violent outbursts. My husband and I have been trying to find a "fix" and have taken him to several psychiatrists, social workers, and a psychologist. He has resisted all overtures of help and stops taking medication as soon as he feels better. Recently, my son told me, "You don't know what my problem is. Stop trying to find out what it is, and stop trying to fix me." I identify with many of the author's experiences with Tom, and I found his description of the family's journey enlightening. I feel the truth of much that he says. How brave of him to step back and allow his son to go the unconventional route. How futile it is to lock horns and exhaust each other! I am not a churchgoer, but I appreciate the spirituality of this journey and the role of grace in Tom's healing. I found this book the most real of all the books I have read on teen depression, and it has given me a lot of hope for our situation. I have been searching for steps to follow to fix my son. I realize now that healing from depression is a much more nuanced process and will involve trial and error, patience, time, love, and grace. Thank you for this inspired work.

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars A Relentless Hope, June 9, 2008

By	Patricia C. Sullivan "Healing Editor" (Schnecksville, PA) - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

A Relentless Hope: Surviving the
storm of teen depression
By Gary E. Nelson
A Review by Pat Sullivan, Editor Healing Magazine, www.kidspeace.org.

Gary Nelson chronicles his son's fight against depression and how they joined together as a family to bring Tom back. Gary is a minister turned pastoral counselor who provides interfaith counseling youth with problems very much like his son's, which makes he situation even more poignant as one reads about Tom's slide downward into a depression that nearly took the young man's life.

Gary wrote this wonderful little book for teens, parents, teachers, counselors and pastors in hopes of teaching them the signs and how to help them bring other youth from the brink of deep, deep depression.

Tom had been a normal kid who played baseball very well and had many friends. Around the time he entered high school, he started pulling away from the friends and activities he had previously loved and began feeling "sick" and unable to attend school. He spent more and more time in his room and literally days in bed, and he would have fits of rage during which he would throw things into his walls and ceiling, one day almost shattering his bedroom door. He left the baseball team in anger over criticism by the coach and withdrew from all of his friends. Eventually he came to realize that something was wrong, but he had no control over it. He described it to his parents as "feeling like he was being beaten
from the inside." His sleep patterns changed, he was irritable and angry a lot of the time and was unable to focus on schoolwork, sports or relationships with his friends and families. It was perhaps harder for Gary to watch considering that he was a counselor himself yet unable to reach his own son. Gary also became very concerned that Tom may turn to suicide to stop the pain he was experiencing.

He makes the point that parents need to work "with" their depressed children rather than trying to "fight it" with anger and recriminations. Gary strongly suggests asking your children if you can help them develop a plan for getting through it but not trying to pressure them into feeling better because they have no control over it and feel like greater failures if they cannot meet parent expectations. He also suggests trying to get them into counseling but make sure that you find someone to whom your child can relate and talk. In some cases, medication can help, but that is a big decision that must be made on an individual basis.

Gary and his wife were willing to try some creative and even risky ways of
helping Tom fight his depression and accompanying anxiety, allowing him
to start working at a young age and getting his GED rather than finishing a high school he just could not make himself attend. They bought him a car and encouraged his interest in music, even heavy metal if it made him feel that someone understood his pain.

There are so many strong and hopeful messages in this book to help families get through a child's depression in tact, still spending quality time with other children and not allowing this illness ruin a marriage. Tom is married and doing very well as an adult now, and Gary even describes the wedding that was moved at the last minute due to hurricanes. This wonderful little book speaks of faith and love and hope and a family's decisions to fight to help their child no matter what it took.
It is an inspiration and well worth reading if you have any contact youth who are debilitated by depression.
Copyright 2008 KidsPeace. Reprinted with permission. All rights reserved.

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Very good book for parents and teens, September 8, 2007

By	Sue Scheff "Sue Scheff" (South Florida) - See all my reviews

Unlike some other books written about teen issues, the author takes you through their personal struggles with their son which really gives the book credibility. I was impressed with the openness of the book and the reality of what teens go through today.

This book describes teen depression and the what families go through upclose and personal. Definitely a book I would recommend to families that think their child may be suffering with depression. It as an easy read and not overwhelming, yet thorough.