Hospitality can be a blessing to both the host and her guests, but for many women today, it simply doesn't happen. Feelings of inadequacy, unrealistic expectations, fear of failure, lack of time--all conspire to steal the joy that comes from opening one's home and sharing fellowship with others. In The Reluctant Entertainer, Sandy Coughlin relates to people in real ways about real meals that mortals cook, during which real conversations draw people together. Would-be hostesses will discover that true hospitality is not about being perfect, cooking a fancy meal, or spending a lot of money. Rather, it's about an open door and an open heart.
Reluctant Entertainer, The
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Book Description
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Editorial Reviews
Review
The Reluctant Entertainer is a helpful resource for any woman, however reluctantly she may view entertaining. I for one greatly appreciate Sandy's encouragement! --5MinutesforBooks.com
From the Back Cover
Real Entertaining for Real People
"The Reluctant Entertainer is my go-to guide for practical and inspiring ideas for opening my home to others. In her gracious and gentle way, Sandy helps us women move past our fears and personal hang-ups by providing the tools and perspective to make entertaining doable and enjoyable!"
--Melissa Michaels, creator of the Inspired Room blog
"For any excuse-making woman who avoids inviting guests into her home, this book should be required reading. The Reluctant Entertainer gently unveils common misconceptions about entertaining and guides women to the freeing truth: The art of hospitality is about connection, not perfection. I wish I could have read this book fifteen years ago."
--The Nester, creator of the Nesting Place blog
mouthwatering recipes
practical advice
thrifty tips
heartfelt encouragement
True hospitality is not about being perfect, cooking a fancy meal, or spending a lot of money. Rather, it's about an open door and an open heart. Popular blogger Sandy Coughlin offers a simple but savvy approach to help women break free of the anxieties that keep them from opening their homes. Emphasizing the forgotten goal of entertaining--connecting deeply with others--she shows how women can use the gifts and talents God gave them to reach out in love.
"The Reluctant Entertainer is my go-to guide for practical and inspiring ideas for opening my home to others. In her gracious and gentle way, Sandy helps us women move past our fears and personal hang-ups by providing the tools and perspective to make entertaining doable and enjoyable!"
--Melissa Michaels, creator of the Inspired Room blog
"For any excuse-making woman who avoids inviting guests into her home, this book should be required reading. The Reluctant Entertainer gently unveils common misconceptions about entertaining and guides women to the freeing truth: The art of hospitality is about connection, not perfection. I wish I could have read this book fifteen years ago."
--The Nester, creator of the Nesting Place blog
mouthwatering recipes
practical advice
thrifty tips
heartfelt encouragement
True hospitality is not about being perfect, cooking a fancy meal, or spending a lot of money. Rather, it's about an open door and an open heart. Popular blogger Sandy Coughlin offers a simple but savvy approach to help women break free of the anxieties that keep them from opening their homes. Emphasizing the forgotten goal of entertaining--connecting deeply with others--she shows how women can use the gifts and talents God gave them to reach out in love.
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More About the Author
Sandy Coughlin writes the inspiring blog Reluctant Entertainer (ReluctantEntertainer.com), started in 2006 to help women get past their entertaining fears. She loves to share food and entertaining ideas, recipes, gardening tips, and encourages others in the art of hospitality. A busy mom of three teenagers, Sandy is active in various volunteer organizations. She's married to Paul, and their family practices hospitality in their hometown in Southern Oregon.
Customer Reviews
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
25 of 25 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars
a high-quality book, with beautiful photos and graphics, and 40 or so recipes that most women would actually make
October 4, 2010
Format:Hardcover
At first glance, Sandy Coughlin's THE RELUCTANT ENTERTAINER appears to be an unusual release for recessionary times. A book about gracious hospitality and entertaining others in your home (and elsewhere) hardly seems appropriate when so many people are struggling financially. But Coughlin's emphasis on simple, casual get-togethers and the need for deep and meaningful relationships is exactly what makes hers a timely and relevant message.
Though she's an accomplished and experienced hostess, Coughlin fully understands those women to whom hospitality does not come naturally and why they're such reluctant entertainers. Her approach to hospitality is found in the slogan "Real Entertaining for Real People," and she holds true to that principle throughout the book. She's no Martha Stewart, nor does she expect you to be one. In fact, the photo of a "crystal" goblet she uses on her website ([...]) and in the book symbolizes her belief that entertaining needn't be costly or impressive; the goblet is one of many she bought at a dollar store.
Her solutions are deceptively simple. Think you don't cook well enough? Order takeout or have a couple of pizzas delivered. Kids underfoot? Let them help, even if they make a mess. House isn't perfectly furnished or decorated? Who cares? You should be focusing on your guests anyway, not your house. Too busy? Who isn't? All the more reason to make time for others. Simple, maybe, but Coughlin understands how difficult it can be to let go of long-held misconceptions about entertaining. Her conversational writing style is never critical and always encouraging. She writes as if she's taking this journey with you, this transformation from reluctant entertainer to gracious hostess, all the while cheering you on and easing your fears.
Coughlin also offers her "Ten Commandments of Hospitality" (Number 4, "Avoid perfectionism..."; Number 7, "Don't apologize. It's okay to make mistakes..."); describes the "joy busters" that make guests uncomfortable; provides 10 tips for "courageous hospitality"; and even gives ideas for becoming a better conversationalist --- as well as solutions until you succeed at that, like making sure at least one of your guests is better at conversation than you are. And she offers ideas for alternatives to the typical dinner party, like an informal comfort-food meal, a relaxing brunch, or a dessert, coffee and hot chocolate bar.
Another unusual aspect of THE RELUCTANT ENTERTAINER, given the downturn in publishing, is how gorgeous it is. This is a high-quality book, with beautiful photos and graphics, and 40 or so recipes that most women would actually make, with "normal" ingredients and simple instructions. Most can be made in advance, freeing you up to take time before your guests arrive to relax instead of rushing around worried about last-minute food preparations.
Despite the title, Coughlin's book is an excellent resource for women who are already the most gracious of hostesses, as well as those for whom the book is primarily intended, women who think they could never have good friends over for a meal, let alone become an official "entertainer." The former will still get some great ideas, and the latter will likely never look at hospitality in the same way again. Highly recommended.
--- Reviewed by Marcia Ford
Though she's an accomplished and experienced hostess, Coughlin fully understands those women to whom hospitality does not come naturally and why they're such reluctant entertainers. Her approach to hospitality is found in the slogan "Real Entertaining for Real People," and she holds true to that principle throughout the book. She's no Martha Stewart, nor does she expect you to be one. In fact, the photo of a "crystal" goblet she uses on her website ([...]) and in the book symbolizes her belief that entertaining needn't be costly or impressive; the goblet is one of many she bought at a dollar store.
Her solutions are deceptively simple. Think you don't cook well enough? Order takeout or have a couple of pizzas delivered. Kids underfoot? Let them help, even if they make a mess. House isn't perfectly furnished or decorated? Who cares? You should be focusing on your guests anyway, not your house. Too busy? Who isn't? All the more reason to make time for others. Simple, maybe, but Coughlin understands how difficult it can be to let go of long-held misconceptions about entertaining. Her conversational writing style is never critical and always encouraging. She writes as if she's taking this journey with you, this transformation from reluctant entertainer to gracious hostess, all the while cheering you on and easing your fears.
Coughlin also offers her "Ten Commandments of Hospitality" (Number 4, "Avoid perfectionism..."; Number 7, "Don't apologize. It's okay to make mistakes..."); describes the "joy busters" that make guests uncomfortable; provides 10 tips for "courageous hospitality"; and even gives ideas for becoming a better conversationalist --- as well as solutions until you succeed at that, like making sure at least one of your guests is better at conversation than you are. And she offers ideas for alternatives to the typical dinner party, like an informal comfort-food meal, a relaxing brunch, or a dessert, coffee and hot chocolate bar.
Another unusual aspect of THE RELUCTANT ENTERTAINER, given the downturn in publishing, is how gorgeous it is. This is a high-quality book, with beautiful photos and graphics, and 40 or so recipes that most women would actually make, with "normal" ingredients and simple instructions. Most can be made in advance, freeing you up to take time before your guests arrive to relax instead of rushing around worried about last-minute food preparations.
Despite the title, Coughlin's book is an excellent resource for women who are already the most gracious of hostesses, as well as those for whom the book is primarily intended, women who think they could never have good friends over for a meal, let alone become an official "entertainer." The former will still get some great ideas, and the latter will likely never look at hospitality in the same way again. Highly recommended.
--- Reviewed by Marcia Ford
15 of 15 people found the following review helpful
Format:Hardcover
Yep, that's me. A reluctant entertainer. I've had people over to our tiny apartment about three times since we moved in. We just don't have the space to entertain anyone but ourselves, and honestly inviting someone into our tiny home is an embarrassment to me. I keep telling myself that once we move into a bigger place I'll entertain more, but I might be encouraging some bad habits by not practicing hospitality right now.
Then I got the chance to review The Reluctant Entertainer by Sandy Coughlin. Sandy Coughlin is a popular blogger on the subject of entertaining and hospitality. Through this book, she offers encouragement and ideas to help women break free of the fears that keep them from practicing hospitality. This book emphasizes the lost art of entertaining and, more importantly, connecting deeply with others. This book is full of meal ideas, party ideas, conversation starters and reassurance that it is okay that we are not all Martha Stewart. The heart of the book resounds with the message that people don't care if you or your house is perfect; they long to connect to others just like you do.
Read. This. Book. I still feel I can't really open our home to anyone at this time, but we do have plans to move into a little bit bigger space in the near future, and I'm very inspired to begin finding out how much hospitality is inside of me. This book will be used as a reference for ideas and a source of courage when I lose my nerve about having people over. I believe our society may have lost the art of hospitality, but that it is not lost forever. I truly can't say enough how much I loved this.
Oh, and Ms. Coughlin's blog is definitely going on my daily reading list.
Bethany House provided me with a free copy of this book as a part of their blogger review program. If you would like to participate in this program, please visit [...]
Then I got the chance to review The Reluctant Entertainer by Sandy Coughlin. Sandy Coughlin is a popular blogger on the subject of entertaining and hospitality. Through this book, she offers encouragement and ideas to help women break free of the fears that keep them from practicing hospitality. This book emphasizes the lost art of entertaining and, more importantly, connecting deeply with others. This book is full of meal ideas, party ideas, conversation starters and reassurance that it is okay that we are not all Martha Stewart. The heart of the book resounds with the message that people don't care if you or your house is perfect; they long to connect to others just like you do.
Read. This. Book. I still feel I can't really open our home to anyone at this time, but we do have plans to move into a little bit bigger space in the near future, and I'm very inspired to begin finding out how much hospitality is inside of me. This book will be used as a reference for ideas and a source of courage when I lose my nerve about having people over. I believe our society may have lost the art of hospitality, but that it is not lost forever. I truly can't say enough how much I loved this.
Oh, and Ms. Coughlin's blog is definitely going on my daily reading list.
Bethany House provided me with a free copy of this book as a part of their blogger review program. If you would like to participate in this program, please visit [...]
12 of 12 people found the following review helpful
By Aleksija
Format:Hardcover
I have not finished reading this book yet, I'm about halfway though, but I really couldn't wait any longer to share it with you! It is fabulous! I have always been a self-proclaimed hermit because I'm so socially awkward it isn't even funny. I'm bad at meeting new people and am always tongue-tied. But at the same time, I want friends! And not only that, but being a single mom makes it difficult for me to get out much and I've really been wrestling with the question: "what can I do for God when I'm bad in social situations and broke on top of that?" I want to make a difference. The Reluctant Entertainer was such an amazing answer for me! Sandy is so great at, first of all, telling you to stop trying to be perfect! Nobody cares and perfect people normally intimidate anyways (isn't that so true?). Then she gives you tips and tricks on what to do with what you have and who you are. The main focus is always the connections you are making and I definitely lost sight of that in the worries that I have Goodwill mis-matched dishes, wall with no pictures and very sad cooking skills.
If you're like me and you're terrified of inviting people into your home, then you definitely need to pick up this book and read it! Sandy has actually made me excited to invite people over and I really think God is showing me a path I can take, now, to make a difference in people's lives!
*****Thanks to Bethany House Publishers for offering me a copy of this book in exchange for my honest opinion.
If you're like me and you're terrified of inviting people into your home, then you definitely need to pick up this book and read it! Sandy has actually made me excited to invite people over and I really think God is showing me a path I can take, now, to make a difference in people's lives!
*****Thanks to Bethany House Publishers for offering me a copy of this book in exchange for my honest opinion.
Most Recent Customer Reviews
4.0 out of 5 stars
A lost art.
Gracious hospitality seems lost today. Sandy does a great job of calling us back to having an open home and an open heart. Read more
Published 1 month ago by Polly Gerard
2.0 out of 5 stars
Basically a Hardbound Boring Blog Entry
I'm not new to entertaining, so it's possible this book is too basic, but I really did not find that much useful information in this small book. Read more
Published 5 months ago by Heart Mind Soul
5.0 out of 5 stars
Great Advice!!
This was written with such care and joy. I felt like I was talking with a beloved Aunt or my Nana. Heart felt advice for the "new" hostess as well as great recipes and... Read more
Published 5 months ago by Mamabird
5.0 out of 5 stars
Entertaining and hospitality redefined and simplified
The author presents hospitality in a way that makes it less fearful and more joyful. I would suggest this book to anyone who needs a little nudge to begin entertaining. Read more
Published 9 months ago by Beverly
5.0 out of 5 stars
Fabulous book
This book arrived on time and in perfect condition. The book is a great read and good for all ages. I would recommend to anyone who likes to entertain.
Published 10 months ago by Donald J. Bellott Jr.
5.0 out of 5 stars
Lovely Entertaining
I am not a reluctant entertainer but I liked this lovely book. It's good dream material. As I turn the pages, I think, "The next time I entertain I'm going to . . ." and I do.
Published 10 months ago by Brenda Poinsett
5.0 out of 5 stars
The "how to" book on hospitality!
This is an excellent book on hospitality! Hospitality is becoming a lost art in our fast paced busy lifestyles today. Read more
Published 21 months ago by Marybeth
5.0 out of 5 stars
Makes entertaining seem fun and doable
I'm a nervous person, and when I'm entertaining, my worrying goes into overdrive. I worry about everything. Read more
Published 23 months ago by Caitlin Linden
5.0 out of 5 stars
What an enjoyable surprise!!
This beautiful, elegant book was absolutely not what I expected. I expected a Martha Stewarty how to book about entertaining. Read more
Published 23 months ago by Tammy W
5.0 out of 5 stars
The best I've ready on hospitality
I have read several books on hospitality and this is the best so far. It's realistic and I believe can be adapted into anyones lifestyle. Read more
Published on April 8, 2011 by Always Tea Time
