Customer Reviews

Resilient Identities: Self, Relationships, And The Construction Of Social Reality

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Because we are always seeking verification of who we are and if that inner perception is negative then we will likely marry and continuely seek out those whose view of us matches the internal ideal. The "good" people who praise us, just don't feel right. It is as if they are delusional and just don't know us!!! Our sense of self is made up of patterns of behavior that we repeat, usually without our even thinking about them. We may marry an alcoholic like dad and divorce him only to find another becuase the initial behavior of that person validates who we think we are. VERY interesting reading as is his SELF-TRAPS which is available used.

I gained some insight into how people can select other people and interpretation of events to reinforce their own self views, even if those views are negative. It certainly explains some things I've noticed in relationships and even friendships. A useful book for gaining some more insight into relationships.