Customer Reviews

Resolving Conflict Sooner

5 star:		(2)
4 star:		(0)
3 star:		(0)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

As a successful attorney and businessman I have long taken pride in my skill at resolving conflicts, but I have also been haunted by some puzzling failures. As is normal, I tended to attribute those to the failings of the people I had to deal with. This book very quickly (in less than an hour) helped me to see what I might have done differently and how I contributed to the failures. It also conveyed this information gently enough so I could hear it! The book is positive--it suggests effective technics rather than attacking problematic behaviors. The book is about process and it convincingly conveys the notion that in conflict resolution process is the key--how we deal with differences is more important than the specific disputes over facts or logic. A successful conflict resolution is one in which all parties feel good about the resolution and about each other. In this respect, it is consistent with another marvelous short book, "Justice is Conflict," which first helped me realize that in maintaining civilization and civility, the process for decision making is more important than the substantive differences between hotly disputed issues.

The book would have benefited from one more round of editing to eliminate some very minor but irritating clerical errors, however this did not detract from its value enough to cause me to reduce its rating from five stars.

If you want very concrete ways to respond positively and productively to difficult people and situations (without backing off or escalating) as I did the research for this book, then you maay find it helpful. I crafted this approach after reading 34 (much longer) books on the art and science of conflict, likeability, negotiation and related "get along better" books. Is for those who want a fast read, proven methods, no fluff - and a clear format so they can re-read it in five-minute breaks when one wants to keep cool while under fire. Each year, I re-read it to re-learn these tools. It has helped me to become less reactive - and more helpful and appreciated over time. Life is better. In an often fractious, fast, abrupt world, it has helped me care for and keep the relationships that ultimately give life so much meaning. In fact, I feel so confident that it will help you too, that, when you buy this book and send me an email (www.sayitbetter.com) about the past that most helped you, I'd be delighted to send you, as a gift, my ebook Make Yourself Memorable, a good companion book to keep you on your path of enjoying life.