Customer Reviews

Return to Savage Beach [VHS]

5 star:		(5)
4 star:		(8)
3 star:		(2)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(3)

 

 

if your looking for schlock entertainment or don't feel like thinking about the plot, then this movie is for you... big hooters and lots of 'em. beautiful people in beautiful places doing the most idiotic dialogue known to man; but, this is not supposed to "the bard"---it's "the boink". guys do yourself a favor watch this when:(a) alone, or (b) when your significant other is in a good mood-this type of movie plus PMS or bad moods equals argument city. ladies, please for the love of god, have a sense of humor when watching this cheesy flick!

Of course this movie's bad; but who cares? If you want loads of fake boobs and slow motion giggle, this is the movie to watch! Mr. Sidaris always delivers for guys out there who long for milk from large melons. Great film!

Wow what a funny movie. Some of the worst acting ever, which makes it a very fun watch. ALso the women in the movie are great, especially Shae. You'll see what I mean when you see it. Definitely worth buying if you like huge-breasted women and terrible acting, and very silly action.

Buff Bagwell truly is the stuff. He gives the most awesome performance I have ever witnessed. As though Buff's comedic (not intentionally) presence is not enough, there is random nudity, and explosions that are even more random than the nudity. This is the movie that every college student dreams about making. Two thumbs up.

This is possibly the greatest movie ever made. Who cares about the horrible dialogue, non-existent plot, and blatent flaunting of breasts...You must overlook that to see Markus Bagwell. Any wrestling fan would tell you "Buff is the Stuff."

Biggest god damn boobs I ever saw. My GOD! Rent it alone, leave the VCR on pause and check out those gargantuan honkers. You will not be disapointed if you like big bazooms. I give it two nips up! You like Boobs?

If you were a fan of Russ Meyer, then this is Andy Sadiris' best knock off...or should I say KNOCKERS OFF effort to pay tribute to the Master. Andy gives you more plot than Russ but less nudity which in the case of Return to Savage Beach is a real crime. Julie Strain is easy on the eyes but can not act while Julie K. Smith and Shae Marks gave their best screen performances and really carried the entire movie. A quick snapshot of this movie - a typically convoluted plot with male actors who can't act, girls who get applause for just being able to keep from toppling over, beautiful location shots and lots of explosions. The key to enjoying RTSB - the pause and slow motion buttons. A 4.5 for Andy, too bad he didn't feature Julie and Shae in more of his movies. If you like realistic big fake boobs, this is your cup (DDD) of milk!

Return To Savage Beach is one of the most distracting movies I've ever seen. Actually, a lot of Sidaris' movies are distracting. You can't focus on the plot, when you have beautiful people in beautiful locales driving beautiful cars. I have no idea what this movie was about, but whenever you have women as beautiful as Julie Strain, Julie K. Smith, and Shae Marks onscreen, who cares what the movie is about. You still get some enjoyment out of it. Julie Strain is awesome in this, as she was in most everything she has ever appeared in. There aren't any women working in movies today who are as badass as she was. Sadly, she has retired. I also loved the ninjas in this movie. Yeah, there is some good action to go along with the hot babes and dudes!

After reading one of the other reviews I just had to add my two cents...The other review starts out fairly normal, but then takes a right turn into Shae Marks breasts and goes on and on and on about them, and believe me Shae's breasts at the time of this film deserve just that. I have to agree with the other reviewer that Shae 'had' one of the best overall looking pair in the biz and with only two nude scenes, one very quick and the other running about 1 minute or so a little disappointing we couldn't see more of them. Shae makes this movie and it's a shame she had them reduced. They appeared to be just to perfect for words in both size and shape. They were quite the pair and she is one gorgeous woman. ok, I have to stop drooling and move on. I do get my Andy films mixed up (they're all basically the same), but it's either this film or one other Andy film that we also get to see Pandora Peaks in a great nude scene with some guy in the middle of the forest, showing off her massive headlights, but before she went SUPER HUGE.

Here's to you Andy for making such fun films to watch...too bad there aren't more of these type of films around...

Even by Sidaris movie standards, this film is largely lame. Avoid this one if you can. The storyline is awful and the nude scenes are lukewarm at best. The whole thing really drags. This entry is probably the worst in the series. This series has evolved from the early days with '80s Playmates in the starring roles. The main difference is that the breasts are ALL fake now. If you want a good Sidaris movie check out "Do or Die" (1991),or a more recent entry "The Dallas Connection." These films have much better stories and the nude scenes are far more satisfying. Also, Strain and Smith look a lot better in 'Dallas'.