Customer Reviews

The Rice Room: Growing Up Chinese-American from Number Two Son to Rock 'n' Roll

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I am surprised that anyone contested the worth of Fong-Torres's work. Fong-Torres does not claim to represent the Chinese experience. Rather, he symbolizes the Chinese-American question.

Some readers claim that Fong-Torres's individual experience is made more important than that of his family's, is too acculturated and "patronizing" towards Chinese culture. However, I think that it is necessary to recognize the limitations of the author's upbringing, within the realistic context of immigrant survival, and then appreciate the uniqueness of both his parents' and his experience. If Fong-Torres does reflect negatively, at times, towards his parents' culture, it is because he most negotiate it daily. Just how Chinese should he be? White Americans are never forced to consider these issues.

Like many children of immigrants, his grasp of a home language is at odds with the white American standard of English. Halloween becomes somewhat traumatic. Dating becomes the nightmare of social expectations within his community. Though some readers believe these problems are petty compared with his parents' economic survival, they are formulated honestly and reflexively. In fact, Fong-Torres's eventual return to China, and an interview with his family, would indicate a reverse position--a sincere desire to learn more about his history.

Fong-Torres isn't an authority on Chinese culture; he's only an authority on his own mixed experiences. Furthermore, writing this book, returning to his home country, indicate a desire to explore that contested identity further. No one can determine just "what it means to be Chinese." Therefore, I would remind readers, if you ask a Chinese question, you will receive a Chinese answer.

Ben Fong-Torres should be a household name to you if you are reading this review or.. if you saw ALMOST FAMOUS..where he was somewhat wrongly portrayed as part of an "establishment" press organization, something which ROLLING STONE had yet to become at that time in history. No, Ben (if I may may call him by his first name..)has led a way hipper life than most of us while also negotiating the perils of assimiliation into the alleged "Great Melting Pot" that was the American Immigration dream back when he was a kid. He's about 10 years older than I am but we both share the fact that our parents came to the USA via less than legal means and we share the constant inner struggle of determining to which culture we belong: our parents, our adopted country's.. or some culture that lies mysteriously in-between.

Fong-Torres is of chinese descent, don't let his last name confuse you...that is explained in the book. Like many of us children of immigrants, the first thing sacrficed on our way to a better life was our authentic names. Most of this memoir deals with Ben's difficulties in balancing the two-worlds he was co-occupying and his being increasingly drawn to American teen culture and ultimately the world of Rock-n-Roll and the journalism that sprung up in its wake. Do not think you will get a loving description of his life as a journalist, however. He's covered that territory elsewhere. No... this book appears to be his own genuine but sometimes tortured attempt to describe the unusual manner in which he came to reconcile his ethnicity with the choices he made in how to lead his adult life and mind you, this is no Multi-cultural feel-good story. Ben had it very rough in the ways many of us did, regardless of our origins. The children of immigrants share certain basic experiences that make reading a book like this one useful in grappling with the issue of Multiculturalism, assimilation and the various expectations of immigrant communities.

Ben's story is a very personal one and he makes no attempt to claim he speaks for all the children of chinese parents and as a result, he does not deserve even the slightest of criticisms that have been leveled at him for not being properly reverential to his parents' cultural expectations. He quite rightly chooses to share how precarious it was for a young man of chinese heritage to negotiate the perils of dating outside own's cultural "caste" as while as flouting genuine american hostility towards asian male sexuality in general (although he doesn't go as far as I do in giving those feelings a name).

This book is what it is... the memoir and coming of age recollections of one of our more solid music journalists who just happened to spring forth from chinese roots. If one is sufficiently aware of own's one roots, the possibility exists to see your own life's struggles mirrored in the pages describing his life. Many thanks to Mr. Fong-Torres for the courage to relate his life in such intimate terms and praise to him for not shrinking back from the sometimes painful aspects of choosing to walk a different path than that laid out for you by your parents (no doubt, with love.. which must make it harder all the same). My family sprang from different stock, but his story is not all that different from that of my Irish cousins and siblings not to mention my own. May the road rise to meet you, Ben.

If you are in search of Ben Fong-Torres' actual journalism, try NOT FADE AWAY, acollection of many of his works for ROLLING STONE and do not miss his most important book to date, HICKORY WIND, the only definative book to date on the late and oh so very great, Gram Parsons. The only flaw in that book is Ben allowing Nancy, the mother of Gram's daughter Polly, to go on and on until the reader wretches, about her metaphysical musings about Polly's little prenatal soul pushing Gram out of her life and Gram's ghost standing next to Polly years later. Nancy's seemingly drug-addled ramblings are one of the few bad edits in the book that date the material. Other than that, Fong-Torress manages to pay appropriate Hommage to Gram without furthering any ill-advised Gram-worship. Gram is worhsipped for his talent rightfully so, but as Fong-Torres let's us know, he was one less than happy guy who sprung from one very messed up family with tragedy marking every generation. One could go so far as to compliment Fong-Torress on striking just the right note of Southern Gothic horror in retelling Gram's story, given his own very different upbringing, but that would be condescending and ignoring the fundamental aspect of Fong-Torres' writing which is his ability to live in his subject's skin if only long enough to tell us something crucial or enlightening. Check it out.. HICKORY WIND... the 1st last and best book on Gram (if you skip the Nancy New age tripping, that is).

Which brings me to this suggestion: Why hasn't Ben written the definitive book about Jeff Tweedy??

This reader looks forward to anything Fong-Torres might choose to grace us with in the future.

As the American-born daughter of first generation immigrants who were Chinese take-out owners for 15 years, I could completely relate to Fong-Torres' experiences growing up. My siblings, two younger sisters and a brother, and I spent much of our childhoods working at our parents' Chinese take-out. At the same time, we were expected to get all A's and to bring honor to our family by going to prestigious universities and leaving the blue-collar existence lead by our parents. We too experienced the challenges of moving out of ghetto like housing in the city and into the suburbs of greater Boston. Now, almost in my mid-twenties, I look back on my life and wonder what made us different from the average ABCs of working class backgrounds. Fong-Torres sums it up for me when he brings it all back to his parents and the work ethic, values, and morals that they instilled in him and his siblings. I thank and praise Fong-Torres for writing a book about Chinese Americans that speaks for me and others out there who are like me...

I really enjoyed reading about Ben Fong Torres' life growing up in Oakland's Chinatown. He has a very different perspective than writers of many of the books I've read lately, in that he grew up as an American, appreciating American culture and thought. I've read some reviews that said he sold out his own culture, but I disagree. I'd say that he was very typical. I can completely understand why much of his parents' ways were lost on him and his siblings while they were young.

As someone who is half-Iranian, exposed to many traditions, proverbs, food, and extremely different perceptions of women and men, what was proper behavior, and family life, I can totally relate to this book. As a child, I, too, didn't "get it." I didn't appreciate these differences, and I viewed the Iranian way as nonsense, backwards, idiosyncratic, and generally a pain in the butt.

Oftentimes when one grows up in a family whose parent(s) are immigrants, the children will naturally want to assimilate into the society in which they live. In this case they'll want to be American. However, it isn't until they become adults that they start to appreciate or understand their heritage, which was the case with Torres' memoir, and that discovery on his part makes the whole story that much more touching.

His sense of humor comes shining through in his work as well, which is a nice change from other writers. I enjoyed his detailed descriptions of the hippy movement in San Francisco, and it was fascinating to see the difference between the movement on the streets--mainly for fashion and partying, versus the movement in the universities, which was political, the heart of all the changes.

The only thing that kind put me off was the way Ben Fong-Torres juggled multiple relationships. Although he was the first to admit that his maturity level wasn't exactly up to par when it came to women, I was surprised at how much he (and his brother Barry) were able to do this unscathed.

I'm glad that he wrote in detail about his siblings, how they struggled as well, especially his brother Barry, who was the impetus behind this book (I almost wish he wrote as much about his sisters!). Ben Fong-Torres obviously had (and probably still has) a very interesting life with a great many stories to tell. There were many facets to his life; the Chinese-American experience, his appreciation for rock n' roll music, his work with the Rolling Stone, and his ever-evolving relationship with his family. His story is worth reading.

As a second-generation Chinese born to parents who immigrated to North America in the 1970s, I cannot relate to all of the experiences that Fong-Torres presents. However, in many instances, I identify completely.

I also disagree with the view of some reviewers that Fong-Torres had a lack of respect towards Chinese culture. His word choice may indicate an occasional unhappiness with some of the traditions of Chinese culture, but overall, it is clear that he has a deep respect for his past. Especially prominent is his recognition of language barriers with his parents, and an attempt to arrive full circle with his heritage at the conclusion of the book (with a visit to China). Being born what many would term an, "ABC" (American-born Chinese) does not prevent Fong-Torres from embracing Chinese-ness. It is that such an embrace is oftentimes at odds with the white context of America.

Furthermore, if Fing-Torres was UNCRITICAL of Chinese culture, wouldn't that romanticize his experience? I think that his reflexive gestures are necessary and rich.

Also, while Fong-Torres presents a very real and honest depiction of the Chinese-Americans in the 1960s and 70s, by no means can he reflect the entire Chinese-American culture. Certainly, the children of "New Wave" immigrants possess a "whole different set of problems". However, one cannot say that there exists no overlap. Again, I don't think it is his intent to capture all of Chinese-American culture -- it is *his* life and *his* thoughts. (By no means does he attempt to capture the lives of Chinese immigrants.) In fact, I appreciate his honesty.

I recommend this book to anyone interested in Chinese-American culture and especially to Chinese children raised in the America. Parents of ABCs, can also benefit.

Ben Fong-Torres is known to us as primarily a chronicler of rock 'n' roll. In his book, "The Rice Room: Growing Up Chinese-American-From Number Two Son to Rock 'n' Roll," he adeptly writes about not only himself and his family, but also America. Alex Haley gave us "Roots" and Fong-Torres shares with us his roots and the destiny that America's melting pot had in-store for he and his Chinese-American family.

It is an astounding and at the same time a wonderful story. It is OUR story. I am 3rd generation Polish-American and I see and feel many of the same things that Fong-Torres does as he shares his experiences with us: from his parents efforts to escape China with and enter the US with false identification papers (his father bought a Filipino birth certificate to circumvent immigration laws), to his growing-up in the rice room of his parents restaurant and their demands and expectations, to the rock 'n' roll culture to which he took such a liking to the untimely shooting death at 29 of his older brother. Although he led a somewhat hard life, the book also reveals a humorous side. A truly wonderful sharing of the American experience.

It would have been tempting for Ben Fong Torres to write one of those "rockstars I've met" memoirs, replete with purple prose about purple people. Ben Fong Torres takes a different tack in this autobiography, telling us about two disparate worlds. One is the world of being the child of Chinese immigrants, living without a great deal of money. The other is the story of a man who seemed born to be a journalist, coming of age in 1960s San Francisco.

Many novels chronicle the Asian American experience in California with a magical realism. The author instead uses a conversational, simple style.

The book is not free from flaws. One section of the book tries to communicate the 60s "free love" experience, but comes off a bit like "hippie chicks I've conquered". It's as though the social failure from high school must show his belated prowess even after all these years. But it's a quibble, overall.

But overall, this book feels more "real" than many more "visionary" works. Mr. Fong Torres' description of how a family tragedy indirectly helps him connect the disparate pieces of his bicultural world really works well.

I thought this book would be flamboyant. It is anything but. It's a simple, solid read by a good writer. It's worth taking in.

This past holiday season, I went home to visit my parents in Tennessee, and made it a special point to sift through the trunks of photographs, diaries and old Marantz tape reels of my family history. We shared stories of my Swedish, Irish and German relatives, and the trials and tribulations of moving to various points of America.

My inspiration for this important and emotional family gathering, was Ben Fong-Torres' book, "The Rice Room." His grasp of not only his immediate family, but of the rich and wonderful Chinese heritage his parents brought with them to California, should be echoed by all. Many of us "European-Americans" have taken our American status for granted, and fail to remember that not only is America only a shade over 200, but we have a long ignored cultural background that could be equally as rich if we researched our history as thoroughly as Mr. Fong-Torres.

His autobiography is not just one of learning "the hard way." He will certainly take you on an emotional roller coaster through the 50's, 60's and 70's, but he also shares a certain boyish wonder -- a Chinese-American version of Woody Allen's 'Radio Days,' if you will. From movies, to magazines; to radio and Rolling Stone, I don't think I have curled up with a better, and more sweeping, book in quite some time.

This book is apparently used by colleges and universities as a required book for Asian culture, and sociology classes. That is certainly a worthy honor for a book so deserving, but it is my feeling that we will see this book on such lists for years to come. Success comes in many colors, and Ben Fong-Torres should be held in highest regard for truly living the American Dream.

Thank you Ben for opening my eyes to the importance of family, brothers, traditions both maintained and broken, music and the power of writing.

I really enjoyed Fong-Torres' autobiography -- he may not be famous but his story has all the elements of great drama and storytelling.

The only thing the book needed was more of this "Tom Gericke" fellow who appears at various points throughout the story. One can tell there must be more good stories about this friend of Ben's. Sequel, Mr. Fong-Torres?

This was a wonderful story and one I would recommend to anybody, especially children of 1st generation immigrants. Being the child of 1st generation immigrant parents, I could also relate to Mr. Fong-Torres search for identity and acceptance. I was moved by his perseverance and determination at getting ahead in life. The fact that he didn't fit the typical Asian mold of becoming a stereotypical doctor or lawyer, but rather the head editor of a musical writing empire (Rolling Stone Magazine) impressed me even more, because he showed a very souful spirit, one that went after his passion of music rather than trying to pursue an obligation at attaining a status symbol job in order to prove success as an Asian-American. In addition, I also thought his stories were fun and entertaining. He grew up in a very colorful time (particularly the 60's) so it was enjoyable to read about all his experiences from that era, which helped make him who he is today.