Customer Reviews

Say It Right the First Time

5 star:		(13)
4 star:		(1)
3 star:		(2)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(1)

 

 

Nothing makes me come out of my reviewing-books-I've-actually-read-procrastination-pit quicker than when I see a pattern like this one:

Between May 3 2003 and May 13 2003 this book receives 10 of its 13 reviews, all of which are five stars...hmm...

This really sucks. I try not to write negative reviews like this but I just can't stand the thought of all us innocent ("...") people out there using the review system to help us make decisions when the system is, in cases like this one, blatantly and disrespectfully abused for shameless self-gain.

Boo-hiss, you're rubbish!

Tips for spotting potentially fake-reviews:

- Tight date-clusters (someone sits at home and knocks off a set of reviews, perhaps for a couple of weeks after book release/the idea first comes)
- A whole bunch of short reviews, often lacking in range or style-variation (all 5-star, naturally) with no bias or 'downsides' to the book (the fake reviewer wants you to buy the book: reviews are all written by one person- often incapable of writing in different reviewer-styles, short because they can't be bothered going to great imaginative lengths (they primarily want to improve the average star-rating; the prime decision factor for joe-buyer))
- a stack of reviewers who have only ever reviewed THIS book (i.e. names 'reviers' give in Amazon are purely for the purpose of writing this single review: sure some probably only DO review one book or forget their old reviewer name or whatever, but not 20 out of the 22 reviewers, surely? One book was 5-star reviewed by 20 people in a space of a month, most of them with "real name" signatures - which is time consuming because you have to verify your name with a credit card- but none of them, despite having gone through the process of name verification bothered to review any other items despite two years passing since their first book review...odd methinks.)

Of course there was one book which had only received 4-star ratings (less-suspicious), but it met all the criteria: large number of short, unimaginative reviews, with flaky-names, all in a one-month date cluster, all by reviewers who never reviewed any other book... hmm...

As before - I'm giving a three star-rating so I myself don't adversely affect the rating of what may well be a good book.

OK, so clearly I need to get out more, but was it helpful that I pointed this out to you?

Ms. Malandro's book "Say It Right the First Time" has surface appeal, yet ultimately fails as a self-help communication manual, primarily due to its inability to understand the psychological principles (such as unchangeable self-interest) behind much miscommunication. The book is full of advice that seems intuitively right, but when put into practice does not pass the "reality" test.

Awesome book. Unbelievable the things we say which hinder what we are trying to accomplish, some of which are surprisingly obvious, and others not so obvious. Great illustrations of what works, what doesn't work and why. It has totally changed the way in which I speak, as well as listen. A must for everyone!

This book is great! Definitely something everyone could use not only in a work atmosphere but just in day-to-day life

The book is a very good resource for anyone who is in a supervisory capacity or needs to talk to other people in the performace of their work.

BTW, before I get to the review, I agree it's very strange that most of the 5-star reviews were posted in the same week of May 2003 (right after it was published), and it only received 1 other 5-star review since then. Also HIGHLY suspicious is that many of those 5-star 2003-era reviews are from the Phoenix/Scottsdale area, coincidentally the same area where the author's consulting company (Malandro Communication) is based, according to its website. Hmmm.....

OK, now for the review itself:

Pros:
The author addresses many leadership challenges that I encountered when I first assumed a leadership position in my previous company, such as being a boss first and a friend second. Her general strategies in overcoming these problems sound effective, although I haven't yet had the opportunity to put them into practice since I am not in a leadership position in my current company.

Cons:
The specific language and phrases she recommends using are WAY too touchy-feely for my taste. Obviously it's important to respect the feelings of your direct reports, and every boss must acknowledge that what they say might be interpreted by employees in many different ways, depending on the personalities involved and previous history. Even so, the author relies way too heavily (in my opinion) on "tell me how you feel"-type language, so much so that my manager would start to lose my respect if he resorted to this type of language with me. I believe there is a happy medium between being obsiquious and being disrespectful, but unfortunately I didn't find that happy medium here.

In conclusion:
I think the best strategy is to couple this book with another book on how to be direct and straightforward while still being respectful (I wish I had a recommendation, but I'm still looking for a book like this myself). This is definitely a book that you should take a look at in the bookstore and read through some of the chapters before buying it, on Amazon.com of course. :-)

This books gives you ways to really use your words to communicate. Everyday phrases trap us without knowing why. Dr. Malandro points out ineffective words and gives powerful alternatives to use in the real world. Excellent book especially for use in business situations.

The author is direct and to-the-point so I'll do the same: This book is great! I've picked up many valuable communication tips and guidelines that no one ever explained or articulated as clearly and precisely as Loretta Malandro. This week I've been using her coaching on how to "manage up" to my boss. In the past, I've avoided communicating about issues I thought would create conflict. Now I'm telling my boss about things that have bothered me for a long time using Malandro's skills for talking straight and he is actually listening and not reacting! I have much more control and power than I ever realized I had by harnessing the power of my words and using the skills in this book on a daily basis. My recommendation: BUY IT, READ IT, USE IT and you'll get results!

Inspired people are the key to business success and sustainability. What leaders say and how they say it can have a huge impact on others. "Say it right the first time" goes right to the heart of taking accountability for our words and behaviours. Dr. Malandro masterfully provides leaders practical strategies that work and ultimately lead to being more effective and inspiring. Leaders should make it a priority to look into the gems contained in this guide to successful leadership communication. The concepts of accountability and partnership become real with Dr. Malandro's insight and experience. When leaders understand how to practice the skills employees will come to work with their heart and soul every day.

As someone who has struggled to diagnose the reasons for communication breakdowns, I finally found practical solutions in this book. Essentially, what I realized is that for all of my education, I knew nothing about communicating. Specifically, I learned that words are not factual or literal, but symbolic... I was often trapped by trying to logically respond rather than hearing the underlying emotional message. This book taught me how to turn this around and get to the heart of the issue, and saves me ALOT of time. Having a practical nature, I would rather enjoy the benefits of making my point than being "right". I strongly recommend this book.