8 of 8 people found the following review helpful:
3.0 out of 5 stars
Watch Out For The Sewer Worms!, March 28, 2004
This review is from: Robot Holocaust (Amazon.com Exclusive) [VHS] (VHS Tape)
This movie is a horrid amalgam of every film in sci-fi. It is part 'Battlestar Galactica', part 'Mad Max', part 'Squirm', part 'Star Wars', part 'Petticoat Planet', with just a sprinkling of 'Chickboxer' (only without the good production values) thrown in for good measure. It stars no one, to tell the truth, but ostensibly stars Norris Culf as 'Neo', and the busty Angelika Jager as 'Valeria'.
The plot, as much of it as can be discerned anyway, concerns a bunch of refugees from the civilization of "New Terra" after the horrible "robot rebellion of '33" laid waste to everything but the last city, which is clearly New York thanks to the hard to mistake, and now sorely missed, World Trade Center towers. The area outside the city is inhabited by 'air slaves' controlled by the Dark One, a big old computer with an attached glowing orb. Neo and his friends team up with a bunch of man-hating female warrior types, and go through a lot of challenges (like a bad Dungeons and Dragons set) to get to the 'Power Station' which is clearly a bad painting on cardboard. They have many challenges including very stupid robots and 'sewer worms', which are clearly hand puppets, to deal with, in addition to a single furry arm of a large spider which is very high in amusement value.
Nobody in this mess can act, and most notably inept are the leads, Culf and Jager. Jager struts around the whole time in a bizarre feather headdress (it's fashionable after the apocalypse, remember) with a weird European (German? Hungarian? Slovenian?) accent talking to the Dark One (which when she pronounces it sounds like 'Dargon' or 'Dar Kwon') and torturing a scientist, who is also a very bad actor. There is a subplot about the air slaves rebelling by taking the Power Station sand (?) and the misadventures of an extremely annoying (obvious 'Star Wars' rip-off) robot who has a bevy of useful attachments.
In a word: wretched.
The film was one of the first season movies mocked by MST3K, and I have not seen that, but it would be a great improvement on this mess. All told this is a dreadfully made film and I have given it three stars with a caveat. The caveat is this: if you really want a good, high quality piece of sci-fi entertainment, it should be avoided at absolutely all costs; if you want a funny and campy, badly made movie to laugh at or to torture your friends with, it would be difficult to do better than 'Robot Holocaust'!
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12 of 15 people found the following review helpful:
3.0 out of 5 stars
Deep in the Power Station Lays the Pleasure Machine., October 8, 2004
Robot Holocaust, is about a sinister and totally hot chick named Valaria who has a sexy, foreign accent. She works for someone named "Doc Juan" . She promises to take us to someplace called "the Womb of Questions" and introduce us to worlds of pain. She's often busy torturing people. "Weeleez his bawnds!" she demands as she repeatedly smacks a riding crop into her palm. She's on a mission to return to the Pleasure Machine, but everybody seems to be stopping her. I think there are also robots or holocausts or something... I don't know, I fast forward through those parts. Anyhow, I think Valeria's hair is really beautiful and that she should have more scenes in this movie.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful:
3.0 out of 5 stars
Did I mention he was a robot? Cuz that's kinda important.Yeah, a robot...awesome, February 16, 2010
This review is from: Robot Holocaust (Amazon.com Exclusive) [VHS] (VHS Tape)
Over the past week or so we have been on a real B hot streak leaving the brothers Sid with a daily appetite for for films of the so bad they're good category. The B cinematic arts has always been our passion in life and figured there was no way one could pass up a film called Robot Holocaust with a good conscience. Typically we're not huge followers of the robot section but do happen to be very open minded and felt it our obligation to sprinkle in a little variety to our film vault. Not to mention after watching we read this was once featured on Mystery Science Theater 3000 sometime ago, leaving us fully confident in our decision.
The plot of Robot Holocaust, if you can even really call it one, presides somewhere in the future of a destroyed New York City. The human race has been made to nothing more then slaves by some very hilarious looking robots who control the earths air supply. Once a handful of horrendous actors decides enough is enough they take to the streets to try and round up an army to bring down the robot regime. As they wander through Central Park they must deal with mutants (which are only people with about $5 worth of make-up on), a feminist gang, and our favorite the sewer worms. What made these creatures so great was the fact they were nothing more then pink sock puppets. You could actually see the hands inside them!
Robot Holocaust really is something special since it's unique to anything we've ever seen in our 15 year B watching careers. Can't really compare it to anything else but will say the quality is in the same league as Wicked Games and Screaming for Sanity. We can't point out what was more hilarious; the awful awful acting, story that must have been written by a couple caged chimps, jaw dropping special effects, or the fact that the people involved didn't walk off the set a quarter of the way through. No matter what it was worth the watch just because it had to be seen to be believed. For a film that couldn't have cost more then $300 to make Sid gives it 3 stars and recommends to only the hardcore B advocates out there.
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