Rules for Aging: Resist Normal Impulses, Live Longer, Attain Perfection [Hardcover]

Roger Rosenblatt (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: October 18, 2000

Acclaimed and beloved prize-winning essayist Roger Rosenblatt has commented on most of the trends and events of our time. His columns in Time magazine and his commentaries on PBS's NewsHour with Jim Lehrer have made him a household word and a trusted friend of millions. Now, at the dawn of a new millennium, Rosenblatt offers the American people a survival manual-fifty-four gems of funny, brilliant, wise, indispensable advice. It doesn't matter: Whatever you think matters-doesn't. Follow this rule, and it will add decades to your life. It does not matter if you are late, or early; if you are having a bad hair day, or a no hair day; if your boss looks at you cockeyed, or if you are cockeyed; if you don't get that promotion, or if you do. It doesn't matter. Nobody is thinking about you: Yes, I know, you are certain that your friends are becoming your enemies; that your grocer, garbageman, clergyman, sister-in-law, and your dog are all of the opinion that you have put on weight. You are also sure that everyone spends two-thirds of every day commenting on your moral disintegration, denigrating your work, plotting your murder. I promise you: Nobody is thinking about you. They are thinking about themselves-just like you. A book to savor, a book to keep, and a book for all ages.

Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

What? A how-to-make-your-life-better-book with more than the ubiquitous seven ways of doing so? In Rules for Aging: Resist Normal Impulses, Live Longer, Attain Perfection, acclaimed essayist and NewsHour with Jim Lehrer regular contributor Roger Rosenblatt boldly offers up a whopping 56 rules for wisely navigating life into your golden years.

Rosenblatt describes the short book (only 140 pages), which began with a column he wrote for Modern Maturity, as a "little guide intended for people who wish to age successfully, or at all." He adds that "growing older is as much an art as it is a science, and it requires fewer things to do than not to do."

Ranging from the fatalistic (rule 1: "It doesn't matter") to the highly practical (rule 26: "Never go to a cocktail party and, in any case, do not stay more than 20 minutes"), rule 2 best illustrates the tone for much of what follows ("Nobody is thinking about you"):

Yes, I know, you are certain that your friends are becoming your enemies; that your grocer, garbage man, clergyman, sister-in-law, and your dog are all of the opinion that you have put on weight, that you have lost your touch, that you have lost your mind; furthermore, you are convinced that everyone spends two-thirds of every day commenting on your disintegration, denigrating your work, plotting your assassination. I promise you: Nobody is thinking about you. They are thinking about themselves--just like you.

Other notables include "Let bad enough alone" (rule 3), "Stay clear of anyone--other than a clergyman--who refers to God more than once in an hour" (rule 8), "Do not attempt to improve anyone, especially when you know it will help" (rule 29), "The unexamined life lasts longer" (rule 40), "Change no more than one-eighth of your life at a time" (rule 48), and "The game is played away from the ball" (rule 55). Nowhere will you find talk of antioxidants or exercise or anything resembling a detox program. Rosenblatt is no health nut, and there is already plenty of material available on that. What you will encounter instead is a gifted writer clearly enjoying his craft, making this slim volume a welcome poke at and departure from the more predictable antiaging fare. --Patrick Jennings

From Library Journal

A multiple-award-winning essayist/ journalist who is currently editor-at-large at Time, Rosenblatt offers sage bits of advice in this nice, neat package. Our favorite: Whatever you think matters, doesn't.
Copyright 2000 Reed Business Information, Inc.

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Hardcover: 160 pages
• Publisher: Houghton Mifflin Harcourt; 1 edition (October 18, 2000)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0151006598
• ISBN-13: 978-0151006595
• Product Dimensions: 7.5 x 5.7 x 0.8 inches
• Shipping Weight: 12.8 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (37 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #432,337 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

ROGER ROSENBLATT is the winner of a Robert F. Kennedy Book Prize, a Peabody Award, an Emmy, and two George Polk awards. He writes essays for Time magazine and for The NewsHour with Jim Lehrer. He lives in Manhattan and Quogue, Long Island.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

62 of 64 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Buy it You'll Like It, December 3, 2000

By 

J. Charles Hansen (San Jose, CA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Rules for Aging: Resist Normal Impulses, Live Longer, Attain Perfection (Hardcover)

This book jumped out at me because 1) It sounded funny, 2) I believe I had read something by Roger Rosenblatt before and liked it, 3) It's short, and 4) There's a comical recommendation by Jim Lehrer of all people on the back.

I was very satisfied. It probably didn't take me more than a couple of hours in total to read, but I literally laughed out loud a number of times, and grinned throughout. His introduction is "This little guide is intended for people who wish to age successfully, or at all....... What follows then, is mainly a list of "don't"s and "not"s, not unlike the Ten Commandments, but without the moral base."

He has 58 short 1-3 page chapters with titles like "If something is boring you, it is probably you," "The unexamined life lasts longer," "Just because the person who criticizes you is an idiot doesn't make him wrong," and "Live in the past, but don't remember too much."

After you're done this is a good book to have around to read to friends, or to pick up when you realize you are taking things too seriously and want to laugh at life.

Excerpt: "A long happy life last five minutes. One would think that this rule would go without stating, but many people actually believe that a long life of uninterrupted happiness is a real possibility. And they act on this belief! They change families, careers, the structure of their faces, countries, everything, for no more substantial reason than they recall five minutes of uninterrupted happiness in the past, and now they wish to re-create the moment in perpetuity. They even convince themselves that the five-minute period they recall was really five years and giddily substitute the exception (bliss) for the rule (confusion, doubt, misery, fear, confusion, and confusion). Happiness is wonderful, but if you have had more than five consecutive minutes of it, it means you weren't thinking."

43 of 45 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars If anyone wants my rule....., October 26, 2000

By A Customer

This review is from: Rules for Aging: Resist Normal Impulses, Live Longer, Attain Perfection (Hardcover)

It would be: Read this book!

My favorite was #2--"Nobody is thinking about you. They are thinking about themselves--just like you." That rule alone saves years of stress.

Or, perhaps, #15--"Pursue virtue, but don't sweat it." As he explains: "The pursuit alone is sufficient to establish your qualities, and if you fail once in a while, your guilt will remind you of the path you didn't take." Comfort for all good intentioned fallible people--which most of us are.

Or #31--Do not attempt to improve people, especially when you know it will help." He points back to Rule #2 and adds: "Nobody is thinking of you--unless you tell them about their faults. Then you may be sure that they are thinking about you. They are thinking of killing you."

If I have any quibble, it would be with the title. A person of any age can profit from it. Perhaps a better title would have been; "Rules That Give You a Fighting Chance to Reach Old Age Without Succumbing to Stress or Having Someone Kill You."

Perhaps he had the better idea after all.

24 of 24 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Wisdom And Laughter, December 19, 2000

By A Customer

This review is from: Rules for Aging: Resist Normal Impulses, Live Longer, Attain Perfection (Hardcover)

Me, me, me. With self-help books infusing society's shelves and more added daily, it gets difficult to cut the wheat from the chaff. What works for some, doesn't work for others and non-needed confusion may set in, defeating the entire purpose! Seemingly half the population is in therapy (be it with a certified shrink or Oprah), and there is nothing wrong with searching for personal improvement. However, a cold dose of reality can be truly refreshing.

Rosenblatt, TIME editor-at-large, supplies humorous cut-to-the-bone advice in, "Rules for Aging: Resist Normal Impulses, Live Longer, Attain Perfection." He's quick on the uptake and profoundly in your face--which works, if you allow yourself to take confessional responsibility. When I read a passage, "If something is boring you, it is probably you." , I gulppingly realized, hey, the guy is right.

Though bitingly cynical at times, his advice on everything from party etiquette to office politics ("Never work for anyone more insecure than yourself") is also delightfully smart and funny. A hilarious read of wisdom, even for those not in need of self-help.