Rules II: More Rules to Live and Love By [Mass Market Paperback]

Ellen Fein (Author), Sherrie Schneider (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: September 1, 1998

Sequel to the bestseller The Rules.

Product Details

• Mass Market Paperback: 224 pages
• Publisher: Grand Central Publishing (September 1, 1998)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0446606219
• ISBN-13: 978-0446606219
• Product Dimensions: 4.2 x 0.6 x 6.8 inches
• Shipping Weight: 4 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 3.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (52 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #531,541 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

178 of 193 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars These books are not as horrible as you think, April 8, 2000

By A Customer

This review is from: Rules II: More Rules to Live and Love By (Mass Market Paperback)

As someone who considers herself a highly intelligent, well-educated individual, I originally turned up my nose at these "manipulative" Rules, claiming, after having read the first book, that they would only work on a certain, superficial type of man. But let me tell you what I've discovered - acting as if you like yourself and your life and that you are just as happy without a man as with one is the only way to ever really find happiness *with* one! Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider have been slammed for writing these books, when in actuality the message they are trying to get across is: "stop being so pathetic, stop sitting around daydreaming about how some guy will make your life perfect, because when you think that way, you're *bound* to end up looking needy and desperate!" I think the reason these books offended so many "feminists" is because even feminists act this way! Even the most intelligent, intellectual, well-educated women in the world doodle their first name with the dream guy's last name, daydream about their wedding, etc...yet hate it about themselves. The bottom line is, don't knock "The Rules" books just because they appear calculating and manipulative. Granted, there are brainless bimbos out there who follow the book to the letter without ever getting the greater message, whose only goal is getting a rich husband. But these books are also great "how-to" guides for those of us who *know* we have to stop being doormats and that we have a tendency to rationalize it by saying we're just "being open and honest". I also recommend "Men Like Women Who Like Themselves".

35 of 39 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars A Clue for the Clueless, December 23, 1998

By A Customer

This review is from: The Rules(TM) II: More Rules to Live and Love by (Pt. 2) (Hardcover)

I have met, chased, been dumped twice by and finally caught by Mr Right. The first two times we dated, things would go well and then I'd start analysing and get clingy (as I did with all my relationships.) The first time he called the third time we dated (we dated and stopped dating THREE TIMES over four years)I had a copy of The Rules in front of me-- strangely opened to the page that said something to the effect of, "Don't be too excied when he calls. . . Get off the phone first-- you are busy and have a life!" I considered it destiny, said it was great hearing from him but that I was only home for a few minutes but had to run as I had an appointment. He asked me for dinner that weekend-- I said I was busy on Friday (I didn't tell him that I was doing laundry!)and he tied me down for Saturday. (Very Rules of me!)

I enjoyed that date, and I wanted it to go on for forever. But the Rules said no-- end the evening first. I told him I was teaching Sunday school the next morning and had to be home by midnight for my beauty rest.

He dropped me off and met me and my kids at the church the next morning. The date DID go on for Forever-- we married three months later.

He later told me that when he called he had been thinking of me-- I was a nice, single mom with three terrific kids and he had decided that I was intellectually great as a friend but that I was too fragile for a romance. He planned on sowing the seeds for a gradual friendship to be built again, but that he was shocked that as needy as I had been, I was suddenly doing other things. He really liked this new woman and wanted to know me better, and he was suddenly having to work to get my attention! As recommended in the books, I decided to not call him if I didn't hear from him-- he didn't call me once for three days and I had made certain to make plans for the next weekend, so oh-well. I waited for him to make the moves. He did. If I had plans with the kids, he even offered to join us-- and he paid for all of us just to be "taking care of me." He worked a shift job the first two years after we wed, and I was always getting called every night he was gone. At a Christmas party everyone said how proud of me he was as he bragged about my community involvment and how he couldn't wait to come home to me. The Rules I & II advised me on how to act under difficult circumstances and I did them-- it is hard to not vomit your feelings out when you feel the weight of the world on your shoulders, but timing was crucial and as a result, he was happier and we couldn't wait for one another.

HE will buy our daughters copies of both for their thirteenth birthdays and to encourage them to be active women with more than romance on their minds. Even when the hormones are screaming that a boy is the be-all/end-all, he'll have more to advise them with as far as saying, "You are worth more than this."

27 of 30 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Confidence kills Co-dependence!, December 24, 1998

By A Customer

This review is from: The Rules(TM) II: More Rules to Live and Love by (Pt. 2) (Hardcover)

The Rules I & II are superb. This is no great piece of literature, mind you, but for someone who used to be a bit of a wild one who had as many broken hearts as she did adventures and didn't know why she couldn't get a commitment, I found these to be an inspritation of my life.

Picture yourself playing a game of tennis, only your opponent is on the other side of the court drinking lemonade while you make all the moves. You are great fun to watch for a while but after a bit, he gets up and walks off the court. You get upset, but realize that you were playing the game wrong-- you need to stay on your side of the court and hit the ball back, but he must also be sending the ball back. "The Opponent" can be your boyfriend, your mother, or your friends. You might really enjoy tennis, but you have to let the other person play, and if they don't, you need a partner who wants to hit the ball back. It is better to hit a ball against a wall or work out than it is to play both sides.

The Rules are about not needing someone in your life, and that if someone wants to be there, they will treat you well-- just as you will treat them well. People have to value each other, and we tend to take advantage of those who are too eager for us and vise verse.

The Rules keep you from doing all the work and of finding the people who really care for you. I don't buy the bunk that they turn you into the little lady who waits on her man-- they are about mutual respect.