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62 of 71 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars
Sadness, January 5, 2010
This review is from: Sacred Singleness: The Set-Apart Girl's Guide to Purpose and Fulfillment (Paperback)
I'd like to start off by saying that I think Leslie Ludy seems like an AMAZING woman and means well. But, I felt strongly inclined to write this review... After being positively impacted by, "When God Writes Your Love Story" (Leslie is an amazing writer), I wanted to grow deeper and picked up "Purposeful Singleness". Sadly, I was left HIGHLY disappointed, and even angry. I was angry because I felt other single women will read this book and feel crappy afterwards and I don't want them to feel that way : ( Women who choose to purchase this book are probably struggling with loneliness and seeking guidance on how to live their life to the FULLEST with peace and joy and fulfillment in Jesus Christ. Well, you will not receive guidance in that area. Instead, you will feel guilty for even HAVING thoughts of meeting the man that God brings into your life. You're told the times you feel scared and discouraged and angry (whoa don't you dare feel angry) means that you are living in sin. If you are a sad, lonely, scared, single woman reading this, yes, give EVERYTHING to God (as the book states). And when you have moments of discouragement, talk to God about it! Tell Him how you feel. He can take it! And don't feel BAD about it when you have those moments (as the book states!)! I just don't think someone who was married at the tender age of 18 (Leslie) can TRULY understand how it feels to fall asleep at night by yourself. I'm 31 years old and I've definitely reached the stage in my life where I am SO in love with God, I know I would still be fulfilled in life and feel his deep love for me every day and continually seek his will even if that doesn't include getting married (I'm even teary-eyed right now and feel his love as I write this). But after reading this book, I actually fell APART for about a week. Sadness. I'm now back on track again (yay!), but just wanted to warn anyone who is thinking about purchasing this book. I think her and her husband should possibly write books about marriage instead (because they do sound madly in love which I think is soooo wonderful).
There were just so many parts of this book that made me roll my eyes (I'm sorry!). Again, I know that Leslie means well, but she missed the mark big time. If you TRULY want to feel loved and SAFE and wonderful and you're seeking God's will for your life, read, "Captivating " by John and Stasi Eldredge. It will change your life and you will be so inspired! You will fall madly in love with God in ways that you didn't even think were possible. You'll fall asleep at night with a huge smile on your face just excited for what God has in store for you (even if earlier in the day you were upset with God because you're 31 and still alone and super confused...). Hehe. Love you guys and God bless...
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16 of 18 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
The Best Yet, January 10, 2010
This review is from: Sacred Singleness: The Set-Apart Girl's Guide to Purpose and Fulfillment (Paperback)
I loved this book. Over the years, marriage was something I was holding on to, even more than God. Almost like I was determind to get married if it was God's will or not for my life. But this book really changed the way I viewed things. I've always known how I should take my single years as a gift, to use it for God's purpose until He would send the right man into my life. But the question that always popped into my head was, "What if that never happens?" The book simply points out, "Will you still love God even if its never His will for you to marry?" Its a very hard question, for me. But I understand that I should never hold anything above God, including marriage. I fully gave up my dream once and for all to God about being a wife someday. And to be honest, I have never felt even happier. Cause the thing is, if I get married one day, that will be great. But if in this life I never do, thats alright as well. Cause God has His best in mind for me, which ever that may be. And I must trust Him by not focusing on what other people have, or what I wish I had, but to focus on God's will and how He will choose to use me this very day. its about taking your singleness one day at a time. Not dwelling on the future. It has greatly inspired me to see my singleness from a different angle, and its ok to not be in a relationship. Its not the end of the world to be single.
My life on the earth is not for myself. its not about what I can do, and what I can accomplish, and get. This book will show you how to have your focus on eternal things, and making those things your top priority. I love how Leslie gets exactly what I feel and knows just what to say. I have never been disappointet.
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8 of 9 people found the following review helpful:
3.0 out of 5 stars
Why is not being married some kind of virtue?, January 18, 2011
This review is from: Sacred Singleness: The Set-Apart Girl's Guide to Purpose and Fulfillment (Paperback)
While this book has many excellent points about trusting God and making Him the focal point of your life (two much needed messages in today's complicated and competitive world)- I'm still not fully convinced that singlehood is a biblical "gift". I believe that singlehood is just another phase of a person's life- nothing more, nothing less.It's not any more holy or fulfilling than being married. Another one of her books went on to say that "loneliness is a gift from God." Huh? Suffering does help us grow, but in and of itself it's not a "gift" just a difficult time- learn from it and move on. Stop "gifting" everything! This particular book left me wondering: if singlehood is so great, why get married? Why ruin a good thing? Why doesn't she talk about the blessings of marriage and the ways marriage can bless people that singlehood can't? Instead she just rants about how great singlehood is and that anyone who wants marriage is commiting idolatry. Another point is, if protracted singlehood is truly a mechanism for happiness and fulfillment- why do books like this even sell? Think about it. If you're truly satisfied in your singleness, why do you need to buy a book about how to be fulfilled in your singleness? And also, why are you still in America? You're supposed to be saving the little children in Africa not wasting your time buying expensive stuff on amazon. In addition, I'm a convert from Islam, and as a Muslim I enjoyed a strong fellowship with people who honored and respected my desire for a spouse. In Islam, there is NO room for celibacy. You have to get married in Islam- no exceptions (besides early death, of course). Singlehood in Islam is just a phase in life not a special "gift" from God. My mom went so far as to say "once you get accepted to a graduate school program, we're going to get a matchmaker and try to find you a good spouse".I once told a Muslim friend of mine that I wanted to get engaged and she said "cool", not "Make Allah your husband!" or "Fall in love with Muhammad!" or "Allah won't bless you with a spouse until you're completely content in Muhammad." That sounds almost as ridiculous as saying "only until you're completely content in the flying spagetti monster, will you have accumulated enough points to earn yourself a husband" or "If you want a husband, go to Africa (as if Africa doesn't have enough missionaries),sleep in a mud hut, convert a couple of poor people to Christianity, and then, depending on what God ate for breakfast that morning, He'll decide whether or not you're worthy of a spouse." Hello? Most missionaries are NOT single or childless. You can be a missionary or run soup kitchens once a month with a family (sometimes it's even BETTER to have a spouse and kids with you to help out with the work).Ms. Ludy is almost advocating a reward/punishment system in which the more lukewarm you are about marriage- the greater your odds are for "winnning" a spouse. If you all of a sudden desire a spouse one day- then oops, you're back to square one. Game over. Sorry,please play again. Imagine if after God created Eve for Adam, Adam said "oh, nice, but I need to focus on my relationship with Jesus right now." No, Adam was breathtaken when he saw Eve! He was amazed and excited and delighted- that's how God wants us to feel about marriage- not "I don't really want it. I'm focusing on college, career, spiritual growth." Why is "focusing on x,y,z" (which often include monetary ambitions...um...something about a needle and camel comes to mind) a virtue and seriously pursuing a Godly marriage "idolatry"? I know most of what I'm saying is a bit of an exaggeration mostly for comedic effect- but I think I am making a valid point. And if you disagree, that is fine. Call me once you find a nonsinful way to have sex without a spouse. Keep reading books about how to be happy single. And as for me, I'm happily taken and loving God at the same time.
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