Customer Reviews

Safe Haven Marriage

5 star:		(11)
4 star:		(1)
3 star:		(0)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(2)

 

 

When you get married, your partner becomes a secure base, a safe haven; someone you can trust to listen and care about your concerns. The secure base is at the heart of your marriage. Whenever this is shattered, the marriage begins failing and, if the wound is not repaired, the relationship can eventually fall apart. This book does a wonderful job of explaining how to identify the wounds in your marriage and how to--practically--go about healing them. I have recommended it to many of my clients and they simply love it. If your marriage is struggling, you may want to check this book out.

This book is about how the arguments between you and your spouse keep you both from emotionally connecting. This book helped my wife and I realize that our conversations focused on trying to get each other to see our own side. We never stopped to understand each other. I defended myself against her accusations until I finally emotionally withdrew and put my emotional energy into work and my own interests. She kept at me saying that if she didn't I would never pay attention to her. My wife and I have been fighting like this for years. Safe Haven Marriage has helped us understand our fight cycle, why we fight and what we can do to change the way we share our views. It helped me see that when my wife's 'porcupine quills' come out and she is mad at me, underneath she is trying to get me to understand her and draw me in. 'Safe Haven Marriage' has helped us understand each other. A great book with great stories. I highly recommend it. It has helped us 'emotionally connect' for the first time in a long time.

a fantastic book. i could not put it down. This is a realistic look at marriage and how to emotionally re-connect with your spouse. It touched right where i live in my marriage, and spoke to my real needs in my marriage. I don't want to learn how to 'communicate', i want to be more than friends with my spouse, i want to emotionally connect. This is the first book that outlined how i can do that. This is the only book i know that blends a Christian perspective with the emotionally focused therapy approach. The stories were informative and very realistic. I highly recommend the book.

I have read many books on marriage but found this one to be different and most helpful. It outlined how my wife and i fight, and then showed us a way out of our fight cycle. We are beginning to learn how to stay emotionally connected, despite our differences. I highly recommend it. We are reading through this book at our monthly couples group - and find the questions at the end of each chapter very helpful.

My wife and I lead the marriage ministry in our church and do much of the marriage counseling. We have used a number of Christian resources to help couples. Our approach is focused around Emotional Focused Therapy. This is the best resource we have found that captures the "process" of how to apply this concept to a realtionship. (works with kids, co-workers, etc as well) If a couple is committed to healing the marriage, and will learn and apply the skills outlined in the book--the marriage can be healed.

This extremely well written book offers sound physical, emotional and spiritual assessments to marital situations and give practical solutions to resolve these inevitable problems. Authors are quite knowledgeable and effective in their presentation. A must have book for all married couples.

This is the best marriage book that I have ever read. I think it should be a must-read for every couple.

I have taught marraige classes with my husband. We have read everything out there. This is the best reference on marriage!

Safe Haven Marriage is an awesome book teaching about how to be a Safe Haven for your spouse. Which, in reality, is what we all want in our marriage anyway! To be loved, valued, safe and secure. It has been eye opening and continues to guide me in being a Safe Haven for my husband. He is readng it also and we are evolving from a very unsafe, explosive couple to Safe Havens for each other and even for others around us! Wonderful book! Highly recommend!

Attachment theory provides valuable insights on why we react the way we do - and why our spouses react the way they do. Understanding why is a basic first step in restoring harmony and security in a marriage. Putting into practice what we learn is an entirely different matter. The suggestions provided are very practical but are increasingly difficult as marriage partners have retreated from one another. If your marriage is on the rocks you probably won't be able to fix it on your own, no matter how good the advice.