Thank you Mary for writing such a fantastic book! I have read 30+ sailing books and yours is now in my top 5, which for me, is saying a lot!
Perhaps one of the most important messages of Mary's adventure, is that she discovers a more intimate and healthy relationship with herself and as a result, makes new and significant decisions about the direction and course of her life. For me Mary's book demonstrates that we attempt to escape ourselves because we have yet to stand on our own as whole person. By becoming intimate with ourselves and confronting both our strengths and weaknesses and thus begin to develop a loving relationship coupled by a willingness to heal those conditions preventing our happiness, this, ultimately, is what our journey in life is all about. Finding peace and happiness within ourselves. Mary's book describes her intimate journey
to find these things ( something we're all looking for ).
Mary makes it clear that when we fail to heal our internal conflicts, those very unresolved issues become magnified in our relationships. What we witness in Mary's journey is the result of entering into an intimate relationship before becoming intimate with our self. Almost everyone does this which is why so many relationships fail to provide the kind of love we hope for( the children really suffer for their parents unresolved conflicts which Mary's book also demonstrates). We are unwilling to be intimate with ourselves because we have so many internal conflicts and instead of resolving them, we long to be in a relationship with another so we can feel loved and appreciated by someone else because we wouldn't do that for ourselves. This common attempt to resolve our own inner conflicts is fraught with a growing sense of unhappiness and insecurity because now we are dependent on someone outside,who now controls how we feel about our self! ( talk about coral reef infested waters!).
So much drama in our lives is rooted in this untreated and unhealthy condition. . Mary finally wake's up through much suffering and unflinchingly honest introspection, providing a good lesson for us all!
Pascal once said, "All of humanity's problems stem from man's inability to sit quietly in a room alone." This quote has far reaching meaning and it deserves deep consideration as we reflect on our own inability to do so. Why can't we be at peace with ourselves? What is bothering us? Is it not our own unresolved issues in relation to loving and thus, healing ourselves? Is our life merely an attempt to distract ourselves from confronting and resolving how uncomfortable we feel inside? Then we want to enter a relationship with another who is doing the same?
How do you think that's going to work out?
Mary's book points out that in our desperate attempt to escape ourselves because of our unresolved, internal conflicts responsible for our feelings of un-love-ability, we fail ourselves and become much, much less than who we really are and what our potential really is. Am 'I' making you feel uncomfortable or are 'you' making yourself feel that way? If you answered "I am making myself feel uncomfortable", congratulations! You are an exception in today's world. Mary's struggle and eventual triumph illustrates how important it is for us to address our original, internal issues prior to any misguided attempts to resolve them by entering into a relationship with another, who again, is attempting the same. The high rate of divorce should tell us we're doing
something wrong and should indicate a need to re-examine our motives for entering into them. I'm not saying we need to be perfect before entering into an intimate relationship but Mary's book illustrates what happens when we don't first have a healthy relationship with ourselves. Funny how the external adventure in many ways reflected their ( her and her husband's )internal one
Mary describe's experiencing "tightness" in her body in one place or the other and "shallowness" in her breath during times of stress. The key here is to take deep breaths and relax during stressful events. Its not easy so we must begin to practice with the small things in life so that when the bigger things come along as they will do, we can remember to breathe and relax and save ourselves from needless anxiety and its often irrational behavior. It makes a world of difference and a huge difference in the world! Sailing Down The Moonbeam is a wonderful journey
of crossing the inner oceans of our self with some beautiful scenery and external events tossed in to make a wonderful blend. Highly recommended read!!! : )
Happy inner journeying everyone!
