Customer Reviews

Satan's Divine Vampir Bible, A New Moral-Value System

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In the dismal 1997 film adaptation of "Spawn," John Leguizamo plays a demon from hell who, in one scene, laments that God gets all the smart followers, while the Devil gets stuck with the imbeciles. The point his character makes is highly arguable, but it was the first thing I thought of upon reading this travesty. Caesar 999's "bible" reads like a random collection of posts from [...]. There are venomous tirades against the former High Priestess of the Church of Satan, classified ads for positions in a new denomination the author intends to create (current membership: one), and plugs for his band - and, as an afterthought, less than half a dozen pages exclaiming the author's "new moral value system" - a list of things the author thinks the government owes him. The entire mess is delivered in the "middle school dropout" style of broken English which has come to dominate online message boards in the modern day. I should have known what I was paying for from the front cover, where the author poses in his best suit - a heavy metal tee and black jeans. I gave this literary disaster one star because Amazon.com's rating system goes no lower.