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Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns: The Romance and Sexual Sorcery of Sadomasochism [Paperback]

Philip Miller , Molly Devon
4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (123 customer reviews)

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Book Description

1995
The classic guide to sadomasochism by two experienced players. This unabashed, entertaining book strips away myth, shame and fear, revealing the truth about an intense form of eroticism too long misunderstood and condemned. It is fully indexed and includes over 225 photos and illustrations, a 250-plus word glossary, appendices with over 650 contacts for SM related clubs, stores, craftspeople and literature.

Frequently Bought Together

Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns: The Romance and Sexual Sorcery of Sadomasochism + Sm 101: A Realistic Introduction + The Loving Dominant
Price for all three: $51.40

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Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

Philip Miller and Molly Devon think that S/M is fun, and "that reading about it should be fun, too." Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns is definitely fun, not to mention approachable, chatty, and insightful. What makes it truly special, however, is the sheer weight of loving details. There's clear explanations and detailed tutorials for beginners, as general as "safe, sane, and consensual" and as specific as "you will be swinging the whip with your arm pivoting at the shoulder." There's also solid advice, safety measures, steamy suggestions, plenty of black-and-white photographs, useful and humorous drawings, an extensive glossary, and over 900 entries of S/M clothing and equipment vendors, publications, computer bulletin boards, and organizations worldwide. As sadomasochism is a practice that's still taboo for many people, the chapter on finding partners and sharing your fantasies with existing partners can be invaluable.

Screw the Roses enthusiastically covers all the basics and even some of the not-so-basics--bondage, negotiation, sex, endorphins, dominance and submission, toys, safety, S/M community, and beyond. It's written primarily from the point of view of male dominant/female submissive interactions, but it's easily translatable into valuable advice for any relationship configuration. Miller and Devon's explanations of not just the how, but also the why, of sadomasochism are honest, sexy, funny--and a must-have for anyone who wants to learn about sadism, masochism, dominance, submission, or bondage. --Cheryl Trooskin


Product Details

  • Paperback: 277 pages
  • Publisher: Mystic Rose Books; 1st edition (1995)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0964596008
  • ISBN-13: 978-0964596009
  • Product Dimensions: 1.1 x 0.8 x 0.1 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1.5 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (123 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #22,954 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

The book is very well organized and easy to read and the authors have a great sense of humor. Shea Thomas  |  35 reviewers made a similar statement
Not only for novices, and veterans, this book is a good read for even the slightly curious. Michael J. Morgan  |  11 reviewers made a similar statement
It helps to explain a lot of the feelings and ideas that go into what makes BDSM so real. F. Boneno Jr.  |  12 reviewers made a similar statement
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
104 of 105 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Everything that you need to know to get started December 30, 2000
Format:Paperback
If you are new to the scene and want to become familiar with the majority of the techniques that you may wish to try then this book is an excellent guide. To begin, it walks through the terminology, the basic mental and emotional elements in SM play, an overview of "scene" and how S&M relationships can be negotiated. Once the book has prepared you with the basic elements of how to enjoy S&M play, it moves into actual techniques: a safety overview, waxing, bondage, flogging, spanking and humiliation. It finishes with a discussion of how to build, transport and hide your dungeon "toys".

Even if you are an experienced scene player, it is unlikely that you are conversant with every possible type of play, so this book serves as a helpful reminder of the basic techniques. While it does not cover the more extreme types of play - water sports, blood sports or mummification, it is comprehensive in it's coverage of the most standard types of play.

Although this book is written by a hetero male dominant and a female submissive, the words of wisdom contained are applicable to everyone. I personally found that having both partner's perspective was very helpful when trying to construct my own session.

If you are looking to get into S&M, this book is a great start to begin play at home. Miss's Abernathy's Concise Guide to Slave Training is an excellent next step. And once you are feeling confident in your private relationship, SM 101 by Jay Wiseman will give you enough credibility to feel comfortable in visiting "public" scene events.

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63 of 64 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars No contest ...best of its class October 10, 2000
Format:Paperback
With 25 five star reviews another is hardly necessary. But this book is everything it should be. its funny, its informative, its approachable and its fun! Easily the best "how to" book on D/s SM ever written.

"Screw the roses" covers most topics in SM play: bondage, spanking, humilation, flogging, types of whips, gear, contact groups, medical issues, safety issues, post-scene comforting and mental aspects. It goes into details on all of the less extreme practices. It treats the more extreme things such as breath play or cutting much more briefly, pretty much warning people off them.

It is full of practical advice and good safety tips. These are punctuated with amusing and erotic personal anecdotes that help keep the reading fun and light. One of the things I most admire about "Roses" is that safety is practically a mantra repeated through out the book. Overall a must have book.

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50 of 51 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns August 20, 2001
By Rinny
Format:Paperback
When I was first learning about SM, I was full of the usual stereotypes and misinformation about it. IMHO, to understand and appreciate SM, it is essential for one to realize that SM turns everything on its head. 'Nothing is what it seems', so to speak. Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns does that better than any other book I've read on the subject, and it does so with abundant love. After reading a few pages of Molly Devon and Philip Miller's book, my unfounded fears about what SM was began to melt away. The book is written with so much love and playfulness that one cannot help but see and feel it. And once the fear from all those inaccurate myths is dispelled, there is room for the *delicious* fears with which safe, sane, and consensual SM abounds. And the loving playfulness is contagious! For these reasons (in addition to those discussed by other reviewers), I highly recommend this book, *especially* for all novices. It is my very favorite! Read, learn, and enjoy.....yummmmm!!
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
2.0 out of 5 stars book
bought it for someone else.....so don't know what it was about or if they even liked it. Sorry can't help more than that.
Published 3 hours ago by ranchbrat
5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent book for beginner's BDSM
This book covers a lot A-Z. Great to have in your collection. From terminology to safety and what to look for in a partner. Worth the money.
Published 1 day ago by Michele
4.0 out of 5 stars Informative
Has a lot of good information. There seems to be something for whatever level you may be at or may be looking to get into.
Published 25 days ago by Chip
5.0 out of 5 stars Prettty good starter reference
Not a bad book for the newbie. Everyone should read through a guide like this before getting involved in S/m at any level. Good sections on rope and how to use it. Read more
Published 1 month ago by MAZ
5.0 out of 5 stars One of the top 3 books on Kink
Truly, one of the best BDSM how to books, written from experience, not a 'novel' or 'erotica'. Anyone looking to learn, or understand what the world outside of vanilla sex is all... Read more
Published 2 months ago by ChuckO
4.0 out of 5 stars better than others
insightful, interesting and a but naughty & suggestive. A very good book! Interesting insight on personal relationships and adventures. Worth the price!
Published 2 months ago by Mia
4.0 out of 5 stars Great read for starters
Great read for starters. I recommend it for those starting to explore the lifestyle. Better to read this than 50 Shades.
Published 3 months ago by Jerome Mason
5.0 out of 5 stars Reading is the best
Humorous and Honest information in this book. It was recommended by several people whom I've met in the lifestyle recently and recommended by several different websites as... Read more
Published 3 months ago by pa
1.0 out of 5 stars Expected More
With all the reviews on this book I expected more, but I guess BDSM just wasn't my thing or I need more of a "what to do" kind of book to show me different ideas to... Read more
Published 3 months ago by Ronda
5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent resource
This is the absolute gold standard for information in this area. The authors discuss the the supreme importance of safety and clarify the myths/ misunderstanding of this... Read more
Published 3 months ago by Shea Thomas
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