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Secret Confessions of the Applewood PTA [Paperback]

Ellen Meister (Author)
4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (27 customer reviews)

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Book Description

August 7, 2007

When a Hollywood location scout comes to Applewood, Long Island, and announces that the local elementary school might make the perfect backdrop for an upcoming George Clooney movie, the PTA's decorum crumbles like a cookie from last week's bake sale.

Enter Maddie, Ruth, and Lisa, three women who become the glue that holds the project together, forging a bond of friendship stronger than anyone could imagine. And not a moment too soon, as marriage woes, old flames, and scandalously embarrassing family members threaten to tear each of them apart. Is their powerful alliance strong enough to overcome the obstacles to getting the movie made in their town? And will their friendship be enough to mend their hearts and homes? Join them as they reach for the stars . . . and try to pull off a Hollywood ending of their own.

At once tender and hilarious, Secret Confessions of the Applewood PTA is a captivating story that turns suburbia upside down . . . with more humor, heartache, and heat than one PTA can hold.


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Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Cat fights erupt among Applewood's soccer moms in Meister's eager-to-please debut. The local PTA, driven by über-wife Suzanne Podobinski, is raising money to build a small stadium at the elementary school when a location scout, searching for a place to film a movie starring George Clooney, happens into their Long Island town. The PTA quickly dissolves into factious committees, and Meister uses the ladies' competitiveness to delve into the histrionic relationships of suburban housewives: lawyer Maddie Schein has an inferiority complex that's exacerbated when she imagines her chiropractor husband has a crush on his cousin; brash, show-offy songwriter Ruth Moss secretly longs for satisfaction after three years of caring for her impotent, half-paralyzed husband; and mousy Lisa Slotnick, married to a millionaire computer geek, is in for a rocky ride after her alcoholic singer mother shows up. As tension mounts, the ladies cast aspersions, scheme, connive and resort to blackmail (a ploy that comes in handy after Suzanne is spotted in a poolside ménage à trois). The comic book"inspired cover and Lisa Kudrow blurb are the icing on this cupcake of a novel. (Aug.)
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

From Booklist

It's every woman's fantasy to have a film--location crew select her hometown for the next movie starring a major cinematic sex symbol (in this case, George Clooney), and when an Applewood, Long Island, elementary school, is deemed a possible site for Clooney's upcoming flick, the members of the upscale community's PTA go into hyperbolic overdrive to turn fantasy into reality. As members of the PR committee, it will fall to Maddie, Ruth, and Lisa to polish Applewood's somewhat spotty reputation when the producers come to town. Accomplishing such a massive public-relations coup would be difficult enough, but add Maddie's failing marriage, Ruth's clandestine affair (with the school superintendent, no less), and Lisa's alcoholic mother to the mix, and you have women facing challenges that make the typical Saturday morning PTA bake sale look like a piece of cake. With sexy characters, sharp dialogue, and snappy pacing, Meister's sassy, saucy debut novel could well turn into a movie of its own. Carol Haggas
Copyright © American Library Association. All rights reserved --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

Product Details

  • Paperback: 400 pages
  • Publisher: William Morrow Paperbacks (August 7, 2007)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0060824816
  • ISBN-13: 978-0060824815
  • Product Dimensions: 8 x 5.3 x 0.9 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 10.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (27 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,689,104 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Ellen Meister is the author of three novels, THE OTHER LIFE, THE SMART ONE and SECRET CONFESSIONS OF THE APPLEWOOD PTA.

A former advertising copywriter, Ellen left the business world to raise a family and chase her fiction-writing dreams. In addition to her novels, she has published numerous short stories and was the editor of an online literary magazine. She currently curates for a literary radio program and mentors aspiring authors. For more information, visit her website at ellenmeister.com. You can connect with Ellen online at facebook.com/EllenMeister.author and twitter.com/EllenMeister

 

Customer Reviews

27 Reviews
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4 star:
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3 star:
 (1)
2 star:
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1 star:    (0)
 
 
 
 
 
Average Customer Review
4.5 out of 5 stars (27 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

15 of 15 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Tongue in cheek amusing deep tale, August 2, 2006
Suzanne Podobinski leads the Applewood, Long Island elementary school PTA drive to raise funds to build a small stadium with everything going smoothly as everyone is in agreement and gets on with one another. That changes when a Hollywood location scout visits Applewood to ascertain whether Appleton Elementary would make a good locale for a George Clooney movie. That information sends the PTA members squabbling into two camps that of President Suzanne and three opponents.

The enemies of President Suzanne are divided except in opposition to her and not wanting to spend time doing the symbolic PTA gig. Lawyer Maddie Schein is more concerned that her husband desires his cousin not her so the PTA is not important. Songwriter Ruth Moss is tired mentally after three years as the sole caretaker of her partially paralyzed spouse and dreams of making love with Clooney but guiltily settles for a local school superintendent. Lisa Slotnick wife of a millionaire computer genius feels as if her past has destroyed her standing when her alcoholic mother visits her. Still each of these ladies has their own PTA concept and will use extortion and blackmail to achieve their objective; but if they team up watch out Suzanne, Clooney and anyone one else challenging the Applewood PTA insurgency.

Tongue in cheek, this understated battle of the suburban PTA moms is an amusing deep tale that focuses on how important it is to have time for oneself but also must believe in oneself. The four female protagonists are fully developed characters with self anointed VIP Suzanne battling to insure her three opponents remain divided while her adversaries know they must overcome their personal agendas and unite if they want to win. The contest brings out the best and the worst in the Applewood PTA.

Harriet Klausner
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16 of 17 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars A Great Discovery, August 1, 2006
By 
snarkfan (Stamford, CT United States) - See all my reviews
If you like Jennifer Weiner, Jennifer Crusie or Susan Issacs, you'll LOVE Ellen Meister's Secret Confessions of the Applewood PTA. Fans of Richard Russo, Richard Yates and Tom Perotta will also enjoy the quality of the writing. The novel follows three women who bond when their kids' school is set as a location for a Hollywood movie (starring the fantasy-inducing George Clooney no less). These characters should not be dismissed as mere housewives, as they are very capable women who use their (often hidden) talents to go after what they want. They are sympathetic characters with depth whose friendship helps them overcome their domestic problems as well as a domineering PTA president. It takes place on Long Island, with its micro-stratified society that has distinctions that are imperceptible to outsiders. People there know where they are in the pecking order and feel an acute sense of superiority to those they see below them and harbor envy and resentment towards the people just above them. This fast-paced, very entertaining book is filled with great dialogue, quirky minor characters, laughs, tears and sex. A great beach read or book club choice, it is a book you will recommend to all your friends.
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12 of 12 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Let Yourself be Wooed and Wowed, August 14, 2006
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What you notice first and foremost about Ellen Meister's debut novel is how humane she is as a writer. The women she writes about are real--they are not caricatures, they are not stereotypes. Instead they fall down, they embarrass themselves, they lose control. They lust, they fight, they envy, they are jealous. They are passionate, they are smart, they love. Basically, they are human.

And in that, we love them and we root for them. And when the book is at its end, we have a hard time letting them go.

Hard for me to say which of the three main characters is my favorite: is it the brilliant Maddie, who loses some of her self-esteem over the years when she believes that her marriage is broken beyond repair? Or is it quiet and unassuming Lisa, who seethes beneath the surface after a lifetime of taking care of her selfish mother? Or is it Ruth, who lost not only her husband but also the better part of herself after his stroke?

The truth is, they are all my favorites.

I cheered when Maddie realized that her marriage was only wounded from a bit of overuse, and when Lisa realized that she is her own best mother, and when Ruth regained the love of herself and all of the glories she has to offer the world. I cheered because I felt genuine affection for all of these women. I cherished their success and felt comforted by their friendship.

But don't let the serious tone of this reader fool you. What you should know is that this book is also funny. Indeed, there are times when you will laugh out loud and shake your head in wonder at Meister's impeccable sense of timing (not to mention her eye for physical humor).

In short, the book's a gem. And no less a gem is the audio companion--Lisa Kudrow reads with an exceptional ear for character, comedy, and good storytelling. In fact, I can't think of a better reader for the book. My favorite characterization of hers would have to be when she took on Ruth. The voice was exactly as I had heard Ruth in my head.

And so the bringing together of Meister's words and Kudrow's reading means some classic entertainment. You won't want to miss out.

Buy the book, buy the audio. Let yourself be wooed and wowed.
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Inside This Book (learn more)
Key Phrases - Statistically Improbable Phrases (SIPs): (learn more)
white ranch house, public relations committee, location scout, movie project
Key Phrases - Capitalized Phrases (CAPs): (learn more)
George Clooney, Applewood Rock, Suzanne Podobinski, Long Island, Paul Capobianco, Lisa Slotnick, North Applewood, Rod Martin, Jerry Murphy, Ruth Moss, Cora Ann, Aunt Shirley, Donna Fishbein, M-vti Vyeiate, Applewood Estates, Field One, Steven Alvarez, Deepdale Road, Howie Fishbein, Jack Rose, Jill Slotnick-Weiss, Marco Island, Regina Dewitt, Applewood South, Home Depot
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