Customer Reviews

Secret Loves: Women With Two Lives

5 star:		(3)
4 star:		(0)
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1 star:		(1)

 

 

This book was a bit clinical for the first chapter or two, but then it became very personal and on a human level. Books where one can go "oh that is me" are such a surprise, especially when you begin reading it thinking this will not help because nothing can help me. The book comes across loving and non-judgemental. My guess would be that most people reading these sorts of books really did not go looking for an extra-marital affair either physically or emotionally and are taken back when it does occur. Happy reading.

The author uses actual cases to identify and explore why some women have long term affairs or external relationships to their marriage. Dr. Friedman breaks the stereotypes and speaks of the taboo, that women are people too, and that sometimes actions transcend gender. The author simply identifies and explores the phenomena, but does not "promote" affairs. I found the book to be a fascinating read, and I have loaned it out to several others as well. I would never recommned such a lifestyle, but I now have a better understanding as to why it occurs. Perhaps men should read the book to give them insight into what they can do and not do to strenthen their relationships with their wives.

VERY GOOD BOOK - SLOW READING BUT VERY INTERESTING - I'VE LIVED THIS DOUBLE LIFE FOR 19YRS - UNTIL RECENTLY WHEN HE DECIDED TO GO A YOUNGER WOMAN - THE SAD THING IT THAT WE CAN NEVER BE FRIENDS AGAIN - I DON'T REGET ANY OF IT - I DON'T ADVISE IT TOO ANYONE BUT I TRUELY DON'T REGRET IT & MAY I ADD THAT I'M STILL MARRIED & HE MIGHT NOT BE!!

After reading this book, I came away thinking it was meant totally as a rationalization for women who have had, or are having, affairs. It read to me, the husband of one of these women, as though Dr. Friedman was doing her best to say that since men have been doing this for years, now it's the women's turn. There were all kinds of reasons given for these affairs, but scant little was said about the damage they do, to family, friends, and even co-workers, of ALL the parties involved. The most common excuse given, the "I wasn't looking for it" just doesn't wash. Are affairs common in our society? Of course they are. But this book tries to legitimize something that is harmful from the get-go.