Secrets of the Baby Whisperer: How to Calm, Connect, and Communicate with Your Baby (Paperback)

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Key Phrases: accidental parenting, sensible sleep, baby whisperer, Los Angeles, Tracy Hogg, Cause Listen Observe Other Ways (more...)

Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

The last thing new parents can find time for is quiet reading, so many helpful books on infant care rely on bullet points and a "let's get to the point" writing style. Tracy Hogg, a neonatal nurse, teacher, and mother of two, uses these techniques to good effect in Secrets of the Baby Whisperer. Focusing on newborns and their parents, her simple programs are a blend of intelligent intuition and methods based on years of experience. The first half of the book is devoted to E.A.S.Y--her name for creating a structured daily routine for you and your baby that makes the most of your baby's awake times and also leaves time just for you. These concepts aren't designed to force your bundle of joy into not following her body's needs, but rather to create a feasible middle ground between total rigidity and on-demand food and sleep (and no time for mom to shower). If it still strikes you as too regimented, keep reading. The author makes room for differences in personal style and includes short quizzes to determine whether you're a "planner" or a "winger", and what level of daily structure you are likely to find helpful. In the same chapter, she identifies five general temperaments of infants, how to get an accurate feel for yours, and what methods of care are likely to be the most effective for his temperament. Her statement that babies prefer routine is backed up by research from the University of Denver. While most of the book relies on anecdotes to get the points across, Hogg does find room to back up some of her statements with quotes from various researchers and institutions. Included at the end of the book are assurances that E.A.S.Y. can be followed even with a colicky baby or one who's been ruling the roost for the first few months. Frustrated parents might like to read the last page first: "all the baby-whispering advice in the world is useless unless you're having a good time being a parent" is an excellent reminder to enjoy this time with all of its ups and downs. --Jill Lightner --This text refers to the Hardcover edition.

From Library Journal

Hogg, an English nurse and founder of Baby Technique, a Los Angeles-based newborn and lactation consulting firm, has a way of calming and caring for babies that led one of her clients to dub her "the baby whisperer." In this, her first book, she teaches parents how to decipher "infants' language"Dtheir cries, gestures, and facial expressions. Her E.A.S.Y. (eat, activity, sleep, your time) method offers a relaxed, commonsense approach. Every aspect of care for mom and baby is covered, with interesting charts and clear references. There are many good books on baby care, such as Arlene Eisenberg and others' What To Expect the First Year (LJ 6/1/89), Jodi A Mindell's Sleeping Through the Night (LJ 6/1/97), and, of course, Dr. Spock's oeuvre, but this book possesses unusual tenderness and heart, and it respects babies as people, albeit little ones. For all public libraries and any parenting shelf, this is the perfect gift for a new mom and family.DAnnette V. Janes, Hamilton P.L., MA
Copyright 2001 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to the Hardcover edition.

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Product Details

• Paperback: 304 pages
• Publisher: Ballantine Books (January 29, 2002)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0345440900
• ISBN-13: 978-0345440907
• Product Dimensions: 8.2 x 5.4 x 0.7 inches
• Shipping Weight: 8.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 3.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (626 customer reviews)
• Amazon.com Sales Rank: #39,444 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

747 of 851 people found the following review helpful:

2.0 out of 5 stars Bad breastfeeding advice, February 2, 2001

By A Customer

This review is from: Secrets of the Baby Whisperer: How to Calm, Connect, and Communicate with Your Baby (Hardcover)

There is a lot to like about this book (even though constantly being called "luv" did get old by about page 3)... in many parts there *is* very good advice. Tracy Hogg claims a middle-of-the-road approach to parenting a newborn and I agree with many of her ideas. She does not advocate letting babies cry and communicates overall the belief that parents should respect their babies as the tiny people they are. Overall, there is a lot of comforting stuff in here.

But I have issues with some of her specific advice. First, I find that she's judgmental about attachment parenting in general. I'm no die-hard attachment parent, but I'm no rigid-scheduler either and I totally disagree with her belief that demand feeding, cosleeping and the like teaches a baby bad habits or does not effectively meet their needs. She presumes that if AP doesn't work for some, then it will not work for all and is therefore not even worth trying because you'll end up with a baby with bad habits to break down the road. My experiences with flexibility vs. scheduled routine have been quite different. Gentle transitions from three completely attached newborns to independent individuals without parent-imposed schedules (it's been much more symbiotic than the method Hogg proposes) have worked quite well in our household. While my style may not be right for everyone, it certainly *can* work, something that Hogg fails to recognize. (She believes the "family bed gives parents short-shrift" without acknowledging that it actually *works* for many.)

Then there is the breastfeeding advice. I am disappointed to see someone who calls herself a lactation consultant try to make such a strong case for formula feeding over breastfeeding. As a mom who has both bottlefed and breastfed (and is still breastfeeding), I agree with Hogg that guilt or judgment has NO place in this decision, but I also feel that she has done a great disservice to moms and babies by understating some very important advantages and benefits of breastfeeding. She explains that "one can make a good case for either formula-feeding or breastfeeding." Unfortunately, she never does get around to making the case for breastfeeding.

In this same section, entitled "Making the Choice," Hogg has a sidebar on Feeding Fashions. In this small box, where I presume she's trying to show that while breastfeeding is currently "all the rage," the tide may turn out of its favor in later years as has happened in the past. (It's not clear here whether she's saying therefore don't choose breastfeeding just because it's a modern day "fad" or that if you decide to formula feed against popular opinion, know that 25 years from now it will probably be "the thing to do" just like it was 25 years ago? I don't get it.) She also says here, "As this book is being written, scientists are experimenting with the notion of genetically altering cows to produce human breast milk [yuk]. If that happens, perhaps in the future everyone will tout cow's milk. In fact, a 1999 article in the Journal of Nutrition suggests 'that it may ultimately be possible to design formulas better able to meet the needs of individual infants than the milk available from the mother's breast.'"

Okay, that is fascinating information, but how should it impact any mother's decision *today*? Feed your baby formula now because in the future it might actually be the best choice!? (A statement in itself which is worthy of an opposing dissertation - there are more advantages to breastfeeding than the mere composition of the fluid.)

Later, in the breastfeeding section, she specifically discourages demand feeding - advice which is direct opposition to breastfeeding recommendations endorsed by the majority of professional lactation consultants and the American Academy of Pediatrics. Hogg has a schedule all charted out for new parents, beginning with day one, which becomes increasing less flexible over a three day period, until you're stuck on that infamous three hour schedule by day FOUR and beyond. She promotes pacifier use (she believes in fostering independence from the very beginning), and "dispels the myth" of nipple confusion. And she seems to favor weaning within the first year, which is again not the recommendation of the AAP. Let me say that I actually agreed with some of her breastfeeding advice (don't watch the clock, don't switch sides, find a mentor), but you need to have a pretty discerning eye to know what is the good stuff and what is er, codswallop. Not good for first-time parents or those learning to breastfeed for the first time.

I'm a little surprised that Hogg is an LC at all, because she really doesn't come across as much of a breastfeeding advocate. In the feeding chapter, she puts LLLI and the US Public Health Service (neither seeking profit) in the same category as formula companies, accusing them all of "huge propaganda campaigns." Then she assures moms that SHE, on the other hand, is going to "help you become clearer about your choice, [providing] empowering information - without the rocket science or statistical numwhack that conventional breastfeeding books tend to bombard you with." Ugh.

76 of 83 people found the following review helpful:

2.0 out of 5 stars Not what I'd hoped for, February 12, 2001

By	Happy Mommy (Idaho) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Secrets of the Baby Whisperer: How to Calm, Connect, and Communicate with Your Baby (Hardcover)

My first impression of this book was that it was like welcoming a sweet English Aunt into your home for a chat about babycare. Her ideas sounded gentle, yet common sense at first.

I do agree with her flexible routine (EASY). I've used this with my daughter who is now 18 months, and my son who is 2 months, though I got it from a different source. Both are great sleepers, so I agree that the daytime routine can affect the nighttime sleep. :)

Beyond that - I found very little of the information in this book to be helpful. Her categories for classifying babies was oversimplified. I don't agree with her opinions of baby bouncers or swings (she's against them completely). And worst of all is her opinions on breastfeeding! Her advice is inaccurate. She tells mothers to supplement with formula before their milk comes in if the baby is less than 6 lbs at birth! She says nipple confusion is a myth. She says that droopy breasts are a result of breastfeeding, though other sources say it's the pregnancy that causes any breast changes - not the breastfeeding. You get the distinct impression that she is very anti-breastfeeding the more you read. As a breastfeeding mother, I was offended by her lack of knowledge of the subject and suprised that she is a lactation consultant (it doesnt show).

Overall, there are some good ideas here if you haven't gotten them from other sources already, but I would really caution a new Mom from taking much of this book too seriously - especially the feeding chapter.

55 of 59 people found the following review helpful:

1.0 out of 5 stars A frustrating book, June 29, 2005

By	L. Gabel - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

This review is from: Secrets of the Baby Whisperer: How to Calm, Connect, and Communicate with Your Baby (Audio CD)

I am a new father and I thought this book would be helpful with our first child. The only part of the book I found useful was interpreting a baby's needs by observing what he does. The rest of the book I found frustrating and sometimes condescending. That's right, "Ducky". It got to the point that I could not even finish it, I was so angry.

Tracy's book states "A baby needs to be shown his/her place within the family, and thus should not be the one to dictate when s/he eats, sleeps or plays." She also states that babies should not be fed on demand, but on a schedule, as part of her "EASY" plan. It's a great theory, but try getting that to work with breastfeeding, where you never know exactly how much milk the baby has consumed. Tracy states that we should learn to read our baby's needs, then respond to them (like when he's hungry). However, that's the essence of feeding on demand, which Tracy is against, isn't it? That's a contradiction. We learn to read our baby's needs, and when he's hungry, we shouldn't feed him, but deny our baby food until the next scheduled feeding. This is cruel, and just added more chaos and crying to the household rather than reducing it.

And what's wrong with rocking a baby to sleep in your arms? It's one of the great pleasures of my day. It's not something you should do, according to Tracy. What you should do is place him in his crib when his eyes are heavy. He invariably wakes up when you do this, so you repeat the process until he falls asleep on his own. This can take an eternity and is equally frustrating.

Skip this book.