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The Secrets to Stepfamily Success Paperback – April 29, 2011

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Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Gloria Lintermans is the author of THE HEALING POWER OF GRIEF: The Journey Through Loss to Life and Laughter, THE HEALING POWER OF LOVE: Transcending the Loss of a Spouse to New Love, THE NEWLY DIVORCED BOOK OF PROTOCOL: How to Be Civil When You Hate Their Guts, and RETCO CHIC: A Guide to Fabulous Vintage and Designer Resale Shopping in North America & Online. Her articles have appeared in local and national magazines, and she is a retired newspaper columnist whose column has been syndicated in English and Spanish language newspapers worldwide.

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Product Details

  • Paperback: 301 pages
  • Publisher: Llumina Press (April 29, 2011)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1605944181
  • ISBN-13: 978-1605944180
  • Product Dimensions: 7.5 x 0.8 x 9.2 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1.6 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (9 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,469,037 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

20+ million step and blended families exist in the U.S. and 2,100 new ones form every day!

For most couples, trying to build a successful remarriage can mysteriously bring out their deepest personal fears, longings, and hopes. The key to not only survival, but living this journey well, begins with discovering opportunities to heal and to succeed; it is not about blame or badness. With the right preparation and resources, a multi-home step or blended family can be a stable and solid foundation for co-parents and children.

THE SECRETS TO STEPFAMILY SUCCESS offers tools that can significantly lower the alarming rate of step and blended family divorce, helping families evolve into highly nurturing, reliable refuges of warmth, safety, encouragement, strength, caring, and joy. Step and blended families have a unique dynamic with which couples must cope, along with all the other normal challenges of life and marriage. See how these families differ in up to sixty structural and dynamic ways from typical intact biological families--including consisting of two co-parenting homes and ex-spouses―and learn how to successfully recognize and manage these challenges.



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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

8 of 9 people found the following review helpful By C. E. Osborne on August 7, 2010
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
Gloria's book pinpoints not only the obvious hazards facing stepfamilies (children and finances), but digs deep to expose and address the hidden anxieties and pain that so often undermine them.
Because stepfamilies are at high risk of re-divorce - about 75 percent fail - she offers valuable insights into why some break up and others survive. With warmth, humor and compassion, she offers tips on healthy remarriage, realistic expectations and win-win problem solving.
I wish Gloria's book had been available when I became stepmom to four children who were unexpectedly dropped into my honeymoon home years ago. Maybe it wouldn't have saved my marriage, but it would have saved me and the children considerable grief. This is a must-read for anyone considering, or in, a stepfamily. I can't think of a better gift book than this for any stepfamily, even one with no apparent problems.
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7 of 8 people found the following review helpful By Claudette Chenevert on August 3, 2010
Format: Paperback
"One of the hardest things about being a parent is becoming a stepparent. When I met my husband in 1990, I didn't think much about the difficulties of raising someone else's children. I thought that since I was a parent myself, we would get along so well. That's not what happened. Reality set in pretty fast.

"What I wasn't prepared for, was all the complexities of having other people involved in our families, all the decision making that needed to be done by more people than just my husband and I. Twenty years ago, stepfamily information wasn't as readily available as it is today. Internet was in it's infancy for those that knew about it and searching for information was a lot more complicated than today.

"Stepfamilies are now becoming more aware that they are not all the same and in order to succeed they need to understand what makes them different. And yet, many refuse to look and face the issues that can make or break relationships. This is apparent with the high rate of divorce in remarriages.

"Gloria's book The Secrets to Stepfamily Success: Revolutionary Tools to Create a Blended Family of Support and Respect provides the tools and skills to make stepfamilies more successful. She approaches the issues with a lot of open and positive insights that make changes possible, even in challenging relationships.

"Many stepfamilies have a hard time finding good resources all in one place. They often go here and there to look for what they need for their particular situation. Gloria brought all this information together. This book is more than just a collection of data on stepfamilies. It's about becoming empowered and hopeful that your family will succeed.
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3 of 4 people found the following review helpful By Marsha Gruen on August 3, 2010
Format: Paperback
I married the man of my dreams; a second marriage for each of us, we both have children from our first. From day one our new household has been a disaster. The children don't get along and play my husband and I against each other. After reading Gloria Lintermans' book, I realized that my expectation was that we would instantly become a "normal" family instead of a "normal" stepfamily. Until now, I didn't realize that our children have about 60 differences to cope with in our new family. Learning this from Gloria's book has helped me to help our children. I have also learned that it was important for our children to have been encouraged to grieve the breakup of their biological families. My husband and I now encourage our children to talk about their feelings about this which has been enormously healing.

Thank you Gloria for the understanding important tools you provide in this important book and for your helpful books I have needed in the past. Your work you share with your readers is so necessary.
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3 of 4 people found the following review helpful By M. E. Wright on October 12, 2010
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
Secrets to Stepfamily Success truly relates to all families, step or otherwise. With insightful gems on every page, this book teaches communication skills everyone can benefit from, regardless of the relationship. The chapter on grief is particularly helpful, addressing feelings that often get swept under the rug.
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I was so looking forward to this book and just sat down tonight to read. I'm worried that I won't be able to make it through the introduction, however. The author (presumably an accomplished woman in her own right) uses stereotype after stereotype to describe the very real financial complexities facing stepfamilies. In her examples, only men pay alimony, only women receive child support, only men support stepchildren financially, only men have wills and insurance policies, only women "stash" money. Argh! It is painful for me to read. I happen to earn more money than either my ex-husband or current husband, have paid alimony, and most certainly have a will and insurance policies. We have the financial complexities she describes regardless of gender, but it is nothing less than insulting to women -- especially those of us who have become even stronger and more independent because of divorce -- to assume that we are all dependent on the males in our lives. Please, please, please update your language so that others don't immediately give up on the book and reject your important advice like I fear I might be doing if things don't improve in the next few pages!
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