The Self-Forgiveness Handbook [Paperback]

Thom Rutledge (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: January 1997

This is a step-by-step guide to overcoming damaging self-criticism, developing a compassionate relationship with the self, and living a more positive and productive life, free of the committee of internal voices that dismiss strengths and magnify blunders and mistakes. Based on the author's inspiring "self-image workshops," "The Self-Forgiveness Handbook" takes readers through a programme of guided exercises that introduce and reinforce the seven essential components of self-forgiveness and personal responsibility.

Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

Thom Rutledge is onto something. Writing in the awareness that the line between spirituality and psychology has blurred, his third self-help book concentrates on kindness. That is, be kind first to yourself and your kindness will flow to others. All psychological healing comes from the ability to forgive oneself.

"A common fear," he writes, "is that self-forgiveness is a snazzy, politically correct, socially acceptable way of letting ourselves off the hook by avoiding accountability and personal responsibility. This is absolutely not true." Self-forgiveness is the starting point of personal accountability. Think of it this way: the individual stuck in self-doubt and self-contempt will be more governed by selfish considerations. Such mental distractions and detritus mire one in self-absorption. Sounds good; how do we get there? First step: to tap the power of awareness, acknowledging the nagging, internal conflict between what we were taught to be in childhood and our present, authentic selves.

Through journal writings and visualization exercises that facilitate deep, internal work, Thom Rutledge (interestingly, he is also a professional magician) takes the seeker on a journey from self-criticism to regenerative self-compassion.

Product Details

• Paperback: 176 pages
• Publisher: New Harbinger Publications (January 1997)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1572240830
• ISBN-13: 978-1572240834
• Product Dimensions: 8.8 x 6 x 0.5 inches
• Shipping Weight: 11.4 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (6 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #598,366 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Thom Rutledge has over twenty-five years' experience as a psychotherapist. Thom's trademark sense of humor, a down-to-earth practicality, and his own compassion are the common threads that run throughout his unique brand of self-help psychology. Thom also writes regularly for self-help/recovery publications around the country, including Steps for Recovery (Los Angeles), The Phoenix (Minneapolis), and Recovery Today.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

20 of 20 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Great Self-Help Book!, March 3, 1998

By A Customer

This review is from: The Self-Forgiveness Handbook (Paperback)

What I like about Thom's book is you can see he has also gone thru listening to all the negative mind chatter you sometimes tell yourself. And he has found clever metaphors to described solutions to re-training your chatter. Or as he put it, learning to talk back to the "Should Monster" (you should have done this or that..) Learning to acknowledge that you thought it but then ask useful questions. I would highly recommend this book, for anyone with addictions or just plain bad self-talk...It will teach you new ways to start talking positive to yourself, A highly uplifting book yet put you to work on some great excercises to change those habits. A refreshing book!

13 of 13 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars A Real Change, April 14, 2002

By 

Jenni Schaefer "Author of "Life Without E... (Austin, Texas) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: The Self-Forgiveness Handbook (Paperback)

Have you ever read a self-help book that actually changed your life for the better? I have read dozens, but the change only lasted for about two weeks. Thom Rutledge's The Self-Forgiveness Handbook: A Practical and Empowering Guide is refreshing among self-help material, because the change in my life has been long lasting.

The Self-Forgiveness Handbook is packed with insight that guides us from self-criticism to self-compassion. Unlike other self-help books that dwell on explanations of how we became so in need of self-help and devote only a few chapters at the end of the book to actually changing, Thom's book provides us with practical and easy to remember techniques from page one. This means that we start changing from day one.

As Thom takes us from where we are to where we want to be, the laughing never stops. His unique sense of humor lives throughout the entire book. Not only did I smile as I turned the pages, but I felt as if I was simply having a conversation with Thom. I suggest that you read The Self-Forgiveness Handbook if you want to feel better about yourself and your
life - for a lifetime.

Jenni Schaefer, author of Life Without Ed: How One Woman Declared Independence from her Eating Disorder and How You Can Too (McGraw-Hill)

14 of 15 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars An attitude changing book, January 8, 2000

By 

Robin Riddle (USA) - See all my reviews

This review is from: The Self-Forgiveness Handbook (Paperback)

This book goes a very long way in helping you change your unrelenting standards that you set for yourself. It gives you the tools and tell you how to use them. The metaphors help make sense of the information. I think Thom Rutledge must have spent some time inside my head.