Self-help for Stoners [Kindle Edition]

Robert Chazz Chute (Author)

Book Description

This is the book that proves fiction is a magic trick. It will surprise you, even when you brace yourself for the unexpected. Dedicated to Joe Rogan and Kevin Smith, this collection of short stories, parables, brain tickles and thought experiments bounces from funny to earnest and from challenging to heartfelt. There are even kick ass exhortations toward making a better life for yourself. This is self-help in disguise and like you've never read before.

At 4:20 in the afternoon, you can go deeper with your introspection and meditation, or just get high on the funny bits. Great stories can fill your brain and transport you far away from banality. We all escape into the lies we tell ourselves. Effective fiction is the lie that tells the truth and possesses ample power to juggle your brain chemistry. Self-help for Stoners might just put you on the road to getting on purpose and changing your life.

Editorial Reviews

Review

"The author relates his offbeat stories with the skill of a journalist and the flair of a stand-up comedian." ~Maxwell Cynn, author of Cybrgrrl

From the Author

Every day, for the rest of my life, I think I will say to someone, "No, you don't have to be a stoner to love it." I've often thought I should have called it Self-help for Surrealists. Inspired by The War of Art and famous stoner podcasts, I came up with a book of self-help in the form of suspenseful fiction. It's a crazy idea, which is why I thought it should work. I think as my bookshelf grows, more readers will discover its charms. Personally, my favorite is the story Another Day at the Office. Everybody should know how to get out of a murder charge with a skunk and a smile. 

I learned it's hard to sell a short story collection, especially when you get funny looks and have to explain, "It's not what you might think it is." It was from one of my readers that I finally figured out what it is: It's a bathroom book geared to lift you up (or get you off the couch) and make you laugh. Sometimes I think I'm a pretty smart guy, but then someone else comes along and tells you exactly what you're doing and all becomes clearer.

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• File Size: 308 KB
• Print Length: 218 pages
• Page Numbers Source ISBN: 0987780751
• Simultaneous Device Usage: Unlimited
• Publisher: BookBaby (October 13, 2011)
• Sold by: Amazon Digital Services, Inc.
• Language: English
• ASIN: B005VRSTPK
• Text-to-Speech: Enabled
• X-Ray: Not Enabled
• Lending: Enabled
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #282,332 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

5 of 5 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Don't Let The Title Scare You Off February 16, 2012

By Anthony Collett

Format:Kindle Edition|Amazon Verified Purchase

I first heard of Robert Chazz Chute when I went to see "Kevin Smith: Left From Behind" simulcast to theatres far and wide from Toronto. Chute thanked Smith for giving him the inspiration to chase his writing dream, to quit chasing the puck, but be where the puck will be. Chute's only regret was waiting until 46 to pursue his dreams, but Smith said it's only too late if you're dead in the ground and the stone tablet has your name on it with the caption "he waited too long".
Even though the title was off-putting to me, Chute's tale inspired me to seek out and read his tales. I downloaded this book on my Kindle and devoured it. I can't say there was a tale I didn't like in the whole collection. But on the off chance you encounter one; don't worry, they're like buses: you don't like this one, you won't have to wait long for the next one. Humorous, interesting, and leaving you wanting to read the next one.
And hey, check out my blog at www dot mahtwocents dot com (hey, I've got my own puck-chasing thing going on, too ^_^)

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful

4.0 out of 5 stars Good read for Non-Stoners too! February 18, 2012

By M Purres

Format:Kindle Edition|Amazon Verified Purchase

Each story transported me from my immediate surroundings to be immersed in the setting of the story, thoroughly enjoying the descriptiveness or banter between characters. There were more than a few times I reached the end of a story, looked up from my eReader and was surprised to find myself in surroundings other than the characters' I'd just read. For me, that is "a good read". Many times I wished there was more beyond just the short story and I look forward to reading longer writings by this author (Novellas? Full Length Novels?); I actually hadn't realized this was a collection of stories when purchased.
The stories range from serious, light, reflective, homorous, rant-ish...really quite an array. There are a number of Canadianisms which are a bit fun (- descriptive references so good that I could 'hear' Rex Murphy in my head) - but I believe that readers unfamiliar with them will enjoy this read every bit as much as a seasoned Canuck.
A recommended read; 4 stars for quality, entertainment, value, however I felt some stories ended prematurely. Hope to see longer content in future.

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Should have bought the hard copy - but great! December 31, 2011

By Mark Young

Format:Kindle Edition|Amazon Verified Purchase

I was halfway through the third story in this e-book collection before I realized my mistake: this would make an excellent bathroom book. Tons of short, funny or suspenseful pieces. Easy to pick up or put down. This brings up the next great challenge for the electronic reading revolution... who's going to leave their e-reader in the can? Will there be special versions of the Kindle or Nook which are waterproof and easily clean up with a squirt of "Toilet Duck?"

Luckily for those of you hearing of this book for the first time, there is now a print version, so we can solve that other problem some other day.

This collection of scalpel-sharp stories, vicious vignettes or bits of stoner wisdom is brilliant. It is a great read, first of all--makes you think, keeps you guessing and all that. But it's also great writing, something you don't always find in an "indie" book. Chute is a real pro who shows he is in top form with an altogether rare amount of second person narration, perfectly executed. Last time I read this much 2P was in Thomas Harris's "Hannibal" or Jay McInerney's "Bright Lights, Big City".

The stories and story fragments in this collection seem like they would be of great value to stoners. Topics covered include how to deal with paranoia, the munchies, illicit bong purchases, stealth baked goods and other weird stuff to think about when you're high. Like first love, skunk transportation, a cold as ice assassin and a gay teen on the run from repressive parents. Okay, so not all of it is a perfect fit, but it is never boring.

The author is dedicated to the concept of indie publishing and those with reservations about this branch of the medium with no literary "gatekeepers" might imagine that this means the material is unpublishable by any other means. That is certainly not the case here. Both the writing and the packaging are professional all the way.

I have read plenty of "traditionally published" schlock which was given the green light by said gatekeepers (maybe when they were high) that was nowhere close to being as well written, edited or presented as "Self-Help for Stoners." This is the real deal, folks. The future of publishing is in our hands. To paraphrase Karl Marx, the workers have taken over the means of production. Publishing establishment take heed: notice has been served.

More About the Author

Robert Chazz Chute (born 1964 - Gee, let's not speculate!) is in suspense (figuratively and literally) and loves funny, hardboiled fiction. He is a former newspaper journalist and magazine columnist who has worked in various worker drone capacities in book publishing's hive mind. The winner of seven writing awards and nominated for a Maggy, he writes surprising stories from his bunker office under a volcano somewhere in the Canadian Shield guarded by a clone army of ninja monkey assassins. He doesn't take himself too seriously, even when writing about himself in the third person. Only the suspense and heft of the literary merit should be taken seriously.

He also does a weekly podcast on iTunes and Stitcher Radio called All That Chazz. A word about titles: Please note that the ebook Sex, Death & Mind Control is neither porn nor is it gory. Jesus is in my titles, but it's pronounced "Hay-soose". Also, you don't have to be a stoner to love Self-help for Stoners. It's all twisted and twisty stories with gut punch endings to delight the reader and distract you from anything that pains you. The author is not available to help any new readers move, but he is handy with a rubber mallet if you are (a) close by, and (b) need anything or anyone malleted.