Customer Reviews

Selfish and Perverse

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Selfish and Perverse is a captivating, hilarious, very gay and very unique book. Smith knows his quirky characters and his settings, Los Angeles and Alaska, inside and out, and manages to make Nelson Kunker endearing, even if he's not the most exciting character in the fabulous first novel. That mantle is reserved for his two love interests, the hard-to-read, smart and cynical yet romantic Alaskan fisherman Roy and the flashy, annoying, but hot movie star Dylan. Staring out with the lowly life of a writer's assistant on a show in Hollywood, with a pit stop sinking into the La Brea Tar Pits, then moving on to remote Alaska, Smith captures each milieu and its inhabitants.

This is also a brilliant book for anyone who's ever written, tried to write, or thought about writing a novel. Nelson's ongoing attempts to write, which we mostly hear about from him, and his agony over not having written, make for great fodder in Smith's hands. Nelson seems young at times, as he waits for the approval of those around him, and while he'll occasionally throw out a zinger or show his anger, for the most part he's cautious, taking his cues from those around him. He has big dreams of writing but is crushed when his boyfriend Roy doesn't ask to read his novel.

It's also the kind of book that, in the midst of joking around, will bust out with a truthful or heartfelt statement that makes you stop to reread it and fully absorb it. There's a tenderness to Smith's sex scenes, as he describes Nelson luxuriating in each vein of Roy's arms, that's sweet and sexy at the same time. Nelson seems like an average, insecure guy, and in some ways, he is--he lacks the flamboyancy of many of the other characters, and yet its his very fears and uncertainties, his mistakes and meanderings, that make him someone it's a pleasure to spend time getting to know. Smith doesn't make anyone here a tragic figure but lets us know that everyone, in their own way, is looking for wholeness, in love and in their careers.

It's to Smith's credit that he made this reader root for Nelson and Roy, but want Dylan to stick around if only to get in their way and be an annoying, showy, needy guy. He's a cheapskate movie star sex addict who needs constant approval and attention, yet I almost felt sorry for him for missing out on the real pleasures of life due to his shallowness. Even the more minor characters, like Roy's mom, Dee, and Nelson's bitchy/funny dyke friend Wendy, are vividly rendered. The unusual setting of a fishing town in Alaska makes for vivid imagery and all sorts of interesting details about things like salmon and nagoonberries. Smith plays up te drastic differences between Nelson's Alaskan life and LA life, the beauty and newness of one and the ludicrousness of the other.I got caught up in this novel and couldn't put it down, and I certainly hope there's more where that came from from Smith.

This is a truly delightful book. Living outside the US, I was not familiar with this author's background in TV comedy. But I have to say that I have not read such a truly witty, funny novel since Christian McLaughlin's "Glamourpuss". The book sparkles with wit. And yet it is not a superficial novel. It grapples with growing up (which we can still be doing in our 30s!), searching for direction, and - of course - love. The characterisation of two of the main 'actors' in the novel - the narrator (Nelson) and the actor Dylan - is rich and complex. One of them (Nelson) slowly evolves before our eyes. The other (Dylan) is slowly *revealed*. In fact, he reminds me very much of a Frank Churchill (from 'Emma') for the 21st century - a complex and incredibly egotistical almost-villain whose depth and schemes are slowly revealed, and yet whom you can't help liking enormously. It may seem odd to compare the author of a 21st century 'gay' novel to Jane Austen, but there are a lot of similarities. Both sparkle with wit, both have very clever dialogue, both like revealing more and more complex layers to what appeared at first to be simple characters, and both have a lot to say about love. Of course, Mr Smith's book is very sexy as well (Jane Austen - not so much). It's a rare treat to find good comedy successfully combined with sexiness. Again, I'm reminded of Christian McLauglin's books.

My main criticism of the novel is that the third corner of the triangle - Roy the manly fisherman/archaeologist - is not as well drawn. Compared to the other two, his character is fairly static and doesn't have the same depth. That's disappointing. Maybe it's not so surprising, though, when you consider that the author is a writer who has also done TV acting :)

If you find (like me) that you've written two pages refuting Mr Smith's theory about how the eagles could have just dropped the ring in Mount Doom and saved everyone a lot of trouble, then you'll realise that there's a lot for geeks in this book! The author has a love of books and good writing that I hope will encourage readers to try some of the works that he mentions. The standout comic moment (for me), without any spoilers, was Nelson's sudden conversion to belief in the literal reality of Shakespearean soliloquies. Very very funny! But don't be put off by the idea that this is a wanky kind of literary novel. Not at all - the literary references are not opaque or off-putting

Overall, this is a very well written novel and I look forward very eagerly to anything further from this author.

I always loved Bob Smith's comedy, and I loved his prior books as well. When the new one, 'Selfish and Perverse' arrived, I greedily devoured it in the course of a long weekend. As usual, Bob's insights are always clever and often hilarious. I also very much enjoy his use of language, and his witty turn of a phrase often had me laughing out loud! The book also has enough that's campy/trashy to keep you tittilated, so it would work as a beach-read as well. It's nice to find a story with gay charaters that doesn't take place exclusively in a big city. Kudos to you, Mr Smith!

Much of Bob Smith's novel SELFISH & PERVERSE is set in and around Anchorage, Alaska, where there is no IKEA store, enough to make me want to move there. The narrator is Nelson Kunker, from Los Angeles, who is stalled on a novel he has been writing for far too long. He meets Roy Briggs, a fisherman/archeology student from Alaska. They ride off into the Alaskan sunset but not quite. A recently-sprung-from-prison actor named Dylan Fabizak gets in the way of this romance, particularly on the side of the narrator who is a sucker for good abs and the rest of the perfect male body. Actually all three main characters are hotter than a stove in the cold of Alaska, but this is a requirement for a good beach novel. In short, these men look like no one many of us will ever know. Muscles ripple and temptation is never far from the surface.

Mr. Smith lets his narrator say some extremely funny things, the best thing about this novel, as well as giving pungent opinions. Nelson on older men, which for him is anyone over 40: "Their beauty was like the sunshine in winter: I could see the light but didn't feel the heat and my appreciation remained dispassionate." His take on reading: "My reading tended to proceed like a row of falling dominoes, one book leading me to the next." Bittersweet chocolate tastes like "an adults only confection sold in the no-one-under-21-admitted backroom of a candy store." Nelson believes that normal men think about sex all the time but sex addicts have sex all the time. He describes modern Scandinavian furniture as "mission furniture designed by agnostics." Then there's Roy's hierarchial catalogue of body odors (page 311), a little too risque to be quoted here.

After all these witty and often insightful observations, near the end of the novel Nelson contemplates writing a sketch about Lucille Ball and Ethel Rosenberg that is in such bad taste and so not funny that you have to wonder what Mr. Green was thinking. Had he done his homework, he would have known that the authorities in June of 1953 had difficulty carrying out her execution. It took her a long time to die (think cruel and unusual punishment), and the executioner kept giving her more electrial jolts. Additionally while the case of the Rosenbergs still remains controversial, many scholars contend that Mrs. Rosenberg was innocent of the charge of conspiracy to commit espionage for which she was executed. Be that as it may, to attempt to make something funny abut such a horrific event in our history is totally inappropriate, at least to me. I suspect the Rosenberg children, Robert and Michael Meeropol, who have written eloquently about their parents and whom no relative would adopt, would agree with me.

Great plot, great story, great characters but many times Smith gets too tangential. It doesn't add to the book at all. The tagents are more distracting. Overall, he is a talented writer. I highly doubt anyone would not enjoy this book.

It didn't make me want to go fishing in Alaska but I sure am glad I read about it. Bob Smith combines Hollywood and Anchorage. Enjoy!

I wanted to like this novel---I enjoyed several of Smith'e non-fiction works, but this fell flat for me. I didn't find the characters particularly likeable and the dialogue and situations seemed to cover the same ground again and again. We have a triangle of sorts where the main character---obsessed about writing a novel, finds a great catch (pun intended) of a boyfriend, but obsesses about a hunky, flirty actor. The plot not very convincingly keeps these three together. You want to shake the main guy and tell him to grow up and get a life. After 200 pages or so of insipid conversations and non events, I gave up.

Bob Smith is funny. You probably know that, if you follow gay entertainment. Smith has been doing stand-up for several years. He's also the author of two nonfiction books filled with his witty insight.

'Selfish and Perverse' is Smith's first novel, yet it's written with skill and flair honed by his years as a comedy writer and performer. Don't be fooled by the title, which is as catchy a net as those used by the talented salmon fishers in the novel's wilderness (it's from a quote by Beethoven about artists). There isn't much kinky stuff going on, unless you consider making out while stoned with a closeted tattooed film star who's fresh out of jail to be perverse. Or perhaps your idea of a hot time is tongue-dancing with a husky anthropologist after you get stuck in the La Brea tar pits.

Although our hero, downwardly-spiraling Los Angeles TV comedy writer Nelson Kunkel, seems to get himself into more than his share of awkward and tarry situations before finally resolving to visit Alaska for the summer, what could be a simple romance story between Nelson and Roy becomes more complicated through some good storytelling.

Actor Dylan Fabizak, fresh out of prison after being arrested for drug offenses while caught naked on TV tripped out of his head, decides to make his post-rehab debut as the guest star on the late-night comedy show 'Aftertaste' (think 'Mad TV'), a show where Nelson struggles to "script-coordinate" funny lines to ego-mad actors.

Fortunately, one of them has a hunky cousin, Roy Briggs, visiting, and with stars in their eyes soon after they meet, Nelson and Roy agree to go on a date. Their mutual interest in anthropology leads to a tour of the tar pits, leading Nelson to become a national TV news laughing-stock, which makes escaping to the Great White North more palatable, particularly after he not only gets caught necking in an elevator with Roy, but also getting stoned in star Dylan's trailer before the show's taping, and subsequently fired. On the upside, the flirtatious star hints about visiting Roy in Anchorage.

Once he's decided LA isn't really doing anything for him, Nelson meets a lot more colorful characters in Alaska, and has his skill set in outdoorsmanship tested. With horndog Dylan tagging along to study Roy for his big comeback role as a salmon fisherman, Nelson becomes caught in the sexual and emotional tension between his working-class hunk of a boyfriend, whose family and friends cautiously welcome him, and the egocentric actor who gradually tempts Nelson with more than a power lunch.

Don't you just hate when that happens?

Of course, it probably hasn't, and never will, but Smith has the swift, casual style that moves some slightly implausible plot-points forward with only intentional clunks and crashes.

Despite the author's claims that his stand-up work is different from his fiction-writing, there is a bounty of hilarious, funny, and wry one-line insights that our narrator shares; so many, in fact, that it's easy to gradually take them for granted. Toward the finale, things do get more serious, and not so funny, but certainly touching and poignant.

If you've ever had fantasies of moving to the country with your flannel-clad dream man, being romanced by a famous Hollywood stud, or doing both at the same time, Smith's novel will either dispel those dreams (with its array of mishaps and misunderstandings), or make you crave them all the more.

(my review published in the 'Bay Area Reporter,' Oct. 2007)

Nelson Kunker is a writers' assistant on a not too successful TV comedy show. In his early thirties he feels in danger of getting stuck in a rut, he is getting nowhere with the novel he is writing, he has no boyfriend, and he feels he is not taking life seriously.

Then two men walk into his life. One is Roy Briggs, a handsome salmon fisherman come archaeology student who is on a visit from Alaska. The other, Dylan Fabizak, a dazzling hunk of a movie star fresh out of prison on a drugs charge. Both Roy and Nelson are convinced Dylan is also gay, but Dylan refuses to confirm or deny it. When Roy invites Nelson to Alaska and salmon fishing, Dylan also turns up - he is about to play a salmon fisherman in a new movie and wants to live the part in preparation.

Once they are all in Alaska Nelson and Roy soon have an answer to the question of Dylan's sexual preferences, but that answer only produces a whole new set of problems, compounded by Dylan's admission that he is a natural liar.

Selfish and Perverse is a very funny and witty story narrated by Nelson, full of marvellous and very quotable lines - of Roy's fisherman's cottage: "It sat amongst cabins and shacks that stood at haphazard angles to each other along the sandy road as if a meeting of houses had been called to discuss forming a street but nothing had been decided". But it is also much more, well written it is cleverly constructed with an unpredictable plot, and it is a tender love story.

This book is entertaining, full of drama, both that of "queens" and that of the natural world. The main character sets off on a hiatus of sorts after he is royally embarrassed and liberated out of LA to write a book, revisit a steamy relationship with a hot butch named Roy, and batt off all the competition including his own weighty desires.

I bought this book right away after listening to an interview with Bob Smith and witnessing his stand-up. The interview was at a point where he was battling his neurological disease, he explained how writing has become a true outlet, allowing him to stay connected with his audience despite his challenges. I thought, I must have this book. Selfish and Perverse is laced with comedy and that is what drew me to it first and foremost. Check it out, no actually buy it because that's what Amazon would recommend!