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Setting Boundaries with Difficult People: Six Steps to SANITY for Challenging Relationships Paperback


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Setting Boundaries with Difficult People: Six Steps to SANITY for Challenging Relationships + Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children: Six Steps to Hope and Healing for Struggling Parents
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 240 pages
  • Publisher: Harvest House Publishers (October 1, 2011)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0736926968
  • ISBN-13: 978-0736926966
  • Product Dimensions: 8.4 x 5.4 x 0.7 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 10.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.3 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (28 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #42,357 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Allison Bottke is the award-winning author of the acclaimed Setting Boundaries series, which includes Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children, Setting Boundaries with Your Aging Parents, Setting Boundaries with Difficult People, Setting Boundaries with Food, Setting Boundaries for Women, and The Young Women's Guide to Setting Boundaries. She is the founder of the SANITY Support Group, an outreach based on the Setting Boundaries series (more than 150,000 sold). Her other books include the God Answers Prayers series, and she is the founder and general editor of more than a dozen volumes in the popular God Allows U-Turns anthology. She has written or edited more than 30 nonfiction and fiction books, and is a frequent guest on national radio and TV programs. Allison lives in the Dallas/Fort Worth area. www.settingboundariesbooks.com Awards Win

More About the Author

Allison Bottke is the best selling, award-winning author of more than 28 non-fiction and fiction books, including the acclaimed Setting Boundaries® series and the popular God Allows U-Turns® series. She is a frequent guest on national radio and TV. Allison also teaches writing workshops at a variety of conferences on subjects such as inspirational creative non-fiction and brand development. She also conducts private consulting and developmental editing. Allison lives in Texas.

Customer Reviews

4.3 out of 5 stars
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See all 28 customer reviews
This would be the best book I have read on this subject.
sunshine
The Christian author, in easy-to-read language, presents spiritual insight and practical tips from a personal and well-researched perspective.
Peggie Bohanon
This book, I feel, will help all who struggle with these issues.
Kathy Warth

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

14 of 14 people found the following review helpful By W. Terry Whalin on January 4, 2012
Format: Paperback
I understand my headline is a bold statement that I found in Allison Bottke's SETTING BOUNDARIES WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE. On page 13, she writes, "We must keep on facing the challenges presented by the difficult people God has placed in our paths. Doing so we can save our lives--at least emotionally if not physically. Difficult people can harm us is we don't have a strategy to deal with them."

Unless you live in complete isolation as a hermit (and who does?), you have some difficult people in your life (family, co-workers, professional colleagues, friends, or you-name-it). In easy-to-understand straight-forward teaching, Bottke gives readers critical relationship tools. In the opening pages, Bottke explains, "The primary goal of this book is to help you identify the role you play in your relationships with difficult people and empower you t make new choices--choices that will bring freedom and forever change the story of your life regardless of whether the difficult people around you ever change one iota." (Page 12)

SETTING BOUNDARIES WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE provides excellent insight and step-by-step action for every reader. I highly recommend this book. In fact, you should probably buy at least two of them--one for yourself and one to give to someone else. It is that good.
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9 of 9 people found the following review helpful By Robert R. Hostetler on November 4, 2011
Format: Paperback
Allison Bottke's "Setting Boundaries" series, and its helpful steps to restoring SANITY to our lives, is a Godsend. Literally. I've already mentioned on my blog that her Setting Boundaries with Adult Children is a book I buy multiple copies of to give away. It's that helpful, and the need for it is that widespread.

I think the same is true of Setting Boundaries with Difficult People. EVERYBODY deals with difficult people. Angry people. Unhappy people. Demanding, cynical, critical people. And the more such people populate (and perhaps pollute) your life, the more Allison's book can help you preserve--or restore--your sanity.
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7 of 7 people found the following review helpful By L. Addoms on July 11, 2013
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
I cant believe I wasted my money on this book. The author did make many references to the bible and Christian philosophy, but I am usually fine with that. I have read Dr. Cloud's boundary book and liked that a lot. Most of the words in his book were his and only a handful of bible references. But this book was completely packed full of references to Dr. Laura's books and to other people's books. If I wanted to read one of Dr. Laura's books (which I 100% do not) then I would have bought her book. I wanted to read this author's words. But this book is crammed full of references to her favorite author's works. And the bible references make up a huge chunk of this book. If you are not a Christian you might want to look for a different book on boundaries. There are many out there much better than this one.
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7 of 8 people found the following review helpful By Sarah Summers on February 2, 2013
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
This is a bit boring, a lot of referencing to others' opinions
and it felt like being preached to...not with a subject like this...
there is some good content but because of being annoyed
with the religion stuff -- one can miss it, or give up on finishing the book
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6 of 7 people found the following review helpful By Peggie Bohanon on November 30, 2011
Format: Paperback
I am pleased to highly recommend this helpful book for anyone dealing with difficult relationships in life. The Christian author, in easy-to-read language, presents spiritual insight and practical tips from a personal and well-researched perspective. Invaluable to anyone "climbing the walls" with people problems--aren't we all! Thanks, Allison, for a wonderful book!
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful By Zara R on July 10, 2013
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
The author of this book really does put a lot of thought into the subject and helps in shedding light on things from a different perspective. I liked that it helped affirm positive resolutions to conflicts you could be having with the "difficult" people in your life in a respectable manner. What I didn't like so much is that there a lot of strict Christian beliefs intertwined with her device, but I ended up adapting that to my personal beliefs so it worked out. If you are looking for a book that leaves religion out, this wouldn't be the book for you. All in all, it did meet my expectations, it was an easy read, helped me manage interactions with a few tough people, but there is no mind boggling epiphany that's going to happen.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By Tami Craig on October 26, 2013
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
This book was "supposed" to be about Setting Boundaries. It references a conversation with someone that used the "f" word excessively and how the author set boundaries with the person to let them know it was offensive. So as a reader I'm thinking this will be a good book. This author drones on and on about what a good Christian she is and quotes scripture on just about every page.

The final straw for me was her statement on how not setting boundaries is "one of the most serious problems facing Christians today".
If this book is only to address problems for Christians then why be deceitful in your title? Why not say "For Christians Only"? Why hide it until after the purchase? It's people like this author that hide behind the word Christianity to make a profit that give actual Christians a bad name.

The author only makes a point about every 30 pages.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By K. Bachelor on August 24, 2012
Format: Paperback
Ms Bottke has an excellent writing style, and has a flair for deconstructing psychological jargon to make her book reachable to a wide audience. From the places she describes in Texas, I know I must live fairly close to where she lives. I'm familiar with the churches she mentions.

I don't mind being a lost child of God, and when she quotes Biblical references, the nightlight in my brain wants so very much for me to turn it off. Yet, her presentation is compelling, compassionate and helpful. At my age, I have found my Higher Power, and I know S/He was there all along waiting for me. Ms. Bottke mentioned her own dalliance with New Age subject matter before she found her peace with Christianity.

I can sigh and pose, or rant about the slant of this book. But I am never in doubt that Ms Bottke is sincere with her desire to provide a way back to SANITY for those of us in pain because of misplaced or missing boundaries. I am glad I read this book, my own personal/spiritual preferences aside. The questions and exercises she puts forth have given me direction.
I would seek out her advice again with the other books in her series, taking what I need, and thanking her for offering so much more.
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