Sex and the Sacred: Gay Identity and Spiritual Growth (Hardcover)

by Daniel Helminiak (Author) "I met Richard about three years ago..." (more)
Key Phrases: Holy Spirit, Biblical Fundamentalism, Catholic Church (more...)

Editorial Reviews

Review
"A SANE AND REASONABLE APPROACH TO SEXUALITY AND SPIRITUALITY--well worth the cost, if only for the commonsense chapter 'The Right and Wrong of Sex--Queer and Otherwise.' That's something everyone needs to hear!" -- Sister Jeannine Gramick, LS, Co-founder of New Ways Ministry; prolific author on gay spirituality, censured by the Vatican for her educational ministry

"A SANE AND REASONABLE APPROACH TO SEXUALITY AND SPIRITUALITY—well worth the cost." -- Sister Jeannine Gramick, LS, Co-founder of New Ways Ministry; prolific author on gay spirituality, censured by the Vatican for her educational ministry

"AN EXTRAORDINARY BOOK for which all lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and intersex people should be grateful. I especially commend the chapter 'The Trinitarian Vocation of the Gay Community.' Danial Helminiak has expertise in many connected fields--theology, biblical scholarship, psychotherapy, spiritual direction--and brings his erudition, insight, and wisdom to bear on thorny issues facing the gay community. Whatever he touches he illuminates with prose that is easy to read and understand." -- Father John McNeill, Author of the groundbreaking book The Church and the Homosexual and numerous other books on gay spirituality; ousted from the Jesuits by the Vatican for his ministry to gay and lesbian Catholics

"AN EXTRAORDINARY BOOK for which all lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and intersex people should be grateful." -- Father John McNeill, Author of the groundbreaking book The Church and the Homosexual and numerous other books on gay spirituality; ousted from the Jesuits by the Vatican for his ministry to gay and lesbian Catholics

"IN ENGAGING, EASY-TO-READ PROSE, Helminiak addresses the central work of spirituality today: to tease out the rich meaning behind religious myths and doctrines so that they make sense to us lesbians and gay men who have been so influential in creating religion yet are so victimized by it. As a theologian, Scripture scholar, psychologist, and gay spiritual apologist, Helminiak shows that spiritual commitment is not at all inimical to modern GLBT/queer consciousness. THE ESSAYS ON HEAVEN AS EVERLASTING ORGASM AND ON THE HOMOSEXUAL MODELING OF RELATIONS WITHIN THE BLESSED TRINITY ARE DELIGHTFULLY PROVOCATIVE AND DOWNRIGHT QUEERLY BRILLIANT." -- Toby Johnson, Author of Gay Perspective: Things Our Homosexuality Tells Us About the Nature of God and the Universe and numerous other books; Former Editor, White Crane: Journal of Gay Wisdom & Culture

"This book should serve as a beacon for lesbian, gay, bi, and trans people, whether religious or not, who have lost their spiritual way. . . . An illuminating study of the queer spiritual experience." -- Christian de la Huerta, Author of Coming Out Spiritually; Founder and President of Q-Spirit

Product Description
A 19th Annual Lambda Literary Awards Finalist!

A down-to-earth look at the spiritual power of sex

Sex and the Sacred examines the spiritual dimension of human sexuality in a way that is free of religious affiliation but still open to traditional religion and belief in God. Dr. Daniel Helminiak, author of the best-selling What the Bible Really Says about Homosexuality, looks at the relationship between sexuality and spirituality, first, from a humanistic perspective and, then, a more familiar Christian point of view. In particular, he encourages LGBTI people to reclaim their spiritual heritage without apology. This unique book emphasizes spiritual commitment as an essential facet of LGBTI/queer consciousness and addresses such burning themes as coming out, the importance of self-acceptance, gay marriage, gay bashing, and the ethics of gay sex.

Sex and the Sacred combines a psychological approach to spirituality with common sense and compassion, inspiring a break from moralistic religion and an understanding of what true spirituality means. The book applies this understanding to Christian topics such as the Bible, Fundamentalism, and the future of Christianity, and shows how coming out was an issue for Jesus, how homosexual experience relates to the Christian Trinity, and how Western Civilization became so sex-negative.

Sex and the Sacred presents in the end a radical vision of Christianity open to all people. Religious leaders of all denominations, educators, counselors, members of the gay/lesbian/bisexual/transgender community, non-religious spiritual seekers, and anyone interested in the relationship between spirituality and sexuality will find this book enlightening and uplifting.

Sex and the Sacred examines:

The spiritual drive that is built into human sexuality
The standard religious arguments against gay marriage
A sustained argument that Biblical Fundamentalism is not Christian
Spiritual lessons from the AIDS epidemic
The right and wrong of sex--queer and otherwise
Homosexuality in Catholic teaching and practice
Sexual ethics without religion
A vision for a renewed Christianity within a global community

Product Details

• Hardcover: 266 pages
• Publisher: Routledge; 1 edition (May 5, 2006)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1560233419
• ISBN-13: 978-1560233411
• Product Dimensions: 8.6 x 6.3 x 0.9 inches
• Shipping Weight: 1.2 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 3.5 out of 5 stars See all reviews (2 customer reviews)
• Amazon.com Sales Rank: #1,184,617 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful:

3.0 out of 5 stars Reclaiming and Proclaiming, May 31, 2008

By	Scott D. Pomfret - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

This review is from: Sex and the Sacred: Gay Identity and Spiritual Growth (Paperback)

Sex and The Sacred: Gay Identity and Spiritual Growth, by Daniel A. Helminiak (Binghamton: Harrington Park Press, 2006), 235pp.

Daniel Helminiak's project in his 2006 collection of previously published essays, Sex and the Sacred: Gay Identity and Spiritual Growth, is a naked act of reclamation. Helminiak, a Catholic priest, professor of psychology and longtime member of the gay Catholic group Dignity, sets his sights on terms like "spirituality", "Christianity", and "natural law," and wrests them from those who would use them to oppress gay people. He provides a cogent re-description of these and related terms in an effort to draw gays and lesbians back to the Eucharistic table. Helminiak's manner is gentle and affirming: he knows that he is preaching to a GLBT audience of the wounded, who regard religious concepts with wariness at best and an understandable outright hostility in many cases. Heroically, he barely acknowledge Sisyphusian nature of his project; he says one thing that brings GLBT spiritual beings close; religious authorities say something new and hurtful that drives them away all over again.
Because he starts from Ground Zero (literally: many of these essays invoke 9/11), some of Helminiak's statements and conclusions are so obvious as to be banal. But patience with these initial assertions pays off: they are building blocks to more ambitious arguments.
Helminiak begins by describing a concept of spirituality that is independent of religious institutions. He describes it as "a dimension to human experience . . . that pulls us out of ourselves and lets us know that we, our very selves, are caught up in something that is vast and marvelous." He posits that the homosexual experience is necessarily spiritual, because the coming out process is one of growth, integration, and self-transcendence. Authenticity is the highest God/good of his conception of spirituality; indeed, for him, authenticity precedes genuine religious experience. Helminiak then reclaims sexuality for spiritual beings, arguing that sexuality - GLBT or otherwise -- is a necessary component of spirituality and not its enemy, as many contemporary institutional religions - including the Catholic Church - seem to believe. For Helminiak, sexuality is also a means of expressing spirituality.
Having reclaimed the term "spirituality" for the non-religious or those with antipathy toward organized religion, Helminiak shifts gears: he argues that while spirituality does not require God or organized religion, there is nothing about spirituality that precludes organized religion -- and, specifically, Christianity. Helminiak then introduces us to Jesus as a model of coming out: drawing especially from the Gospel of Mark, Helminiak shows us a Jesus who did not know that he was God and did not have all the answers, yet spoke from authority - an authority rooted in faith. His take on this Jesus is not one-sided, however. He also acknowledges the difficulty some - particularly oppressed or abused women -- may have with the historical fact of Jesus's maleness.
Helminiak also introduces us to the mystery of the Trinity, but he reclaims that word "mystery" in a way that is liberating:
Most take `mystery' in a negative sense: something that cannot be understood - and they leave it at that. However, there is a more positive understanding of religious mystery: something so rich in meaning that its meaning can never be exhausted.
From here, Helminiak goes to his roots: Catholicism. He first notes that Catholic teaching, in theory, is relatively good for gays and lesbians. The Church does not regard homosexuality as a choice, nor is merely being homosexual considered sinful. Moreover, the Church condemns violence against GLBT people. But Helminiak rightly points out that this teaching has been largely perverted from a pastoral perspective that lives in the real world and recognizes the primacy of conscience to a rigid perspective that makes a fetish out of rules - especially rules involving sexual matters -- claimed to be so eternal they are divorced from history. Eloquent chapters dispatching rule-bound Catholic teaching and defending gay marriage follow. The format is perhaps too short for the full exposition the topics require, but I have never before read a clearer, or more concise, demolition of the position of the Catholic hierarchy as expounded by JPII and B16 and their progeny bishops.
In his final chapters, Helminiak takes on Fundamentalists who call themselves Christian. It's not a well-written chapter: repetitive assertion clouds logical argument and white-knuckle fury blurs Helminiak's more measured prose. But the conclusion is clear: Fundamentalism is incompatible with Christianity. This conclusion leads Helminiak to some of his finest observations. He writes, "It is not the what, but the how of the Bible that turns out to be most important - not what the Bible says, but how it arrives at what it says. " Scriptures are relevant for an ethics built on virtue, excellence, and character formation: "The scriptures teach us to be honest, loving and kind, and this unchanging lesson applies everywhere and always. However, if our intent is the modern preoccupation with ... ethics built on rules that would spell out in legal fashion every act that is to be performed or avoided ...the scriptural teaching becomes moot, for it is debated." What matters to Helminiak is a Biblical attitude: filled with wonder, questioning, dedication, honesty, personal integrity and a commitment to truth. This is why even Fundamentalists ought to admire the hard work of coming out, because it reflects these qualities, whether or not you think homosexuality is a bad thing.
Not everything in Sex and the Sacred works. Some statements consist of maddening assertions that do not follow from the logic of the preceding sentences and left me scratching my head: "Christian belief affirms perfect human integration as the heavenly destination of every human being." "Human integration" was certainly never a topic in any Sunday school class I attended. Moreover, there is considerable repetition here, which no doubt results from the fact that this book is a collection of previously printed material addressing a variety of audiences. Finally, I craved more stories and case studies. In the opening essay, Helminiak introduces Richard, the teen rent boy with keen interest in religion as well as an internalized sense of damnation, but we never hear from Richard again in the ensuing two hundred pages.
Nevertheless, this book's strengths far outweigh any weaknesses. In the closing essay, Helminiak asserts what is singular - and worth defending -- about (reclaimed) Christianity as opposed to other world religions: the inherent coincidence of the divine and the human. God became man in the person of Christ, but equally we Christians believe we can touch and merge with the divine through self-transcendent spirituality - prayer, work, and even more mundane occurrences. Invoking sexual imagery that has a (suppressed) tradition within the Christian church, Helminiak says "Heaven is a never-ending orgasm" - in the sense that orgasm brings us outside of ourselves, is transformative, and is the stuff of spiritual communion.

0 of 3 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Adressing Spirituality, October 12, 2008

By	Amos Lassen (Little Rock, Arkansas) - See all my reviews (TOP 500 REVIEWER)

Helminiak, Daniel. "Sex and the Sacred: Gay Identity and Spiritual Growth", Routledge, 2006.

Addressing Spirituality

Amos Lassen

Daniel Helminiak explores the issue of spirituality in terms of today's society in "Sex and the Sacred" and in doing so he finds the meanings between the myths of religion as well as the doctrines and then rewords them so that they make sense to us as lesbians and gay men. He shows us that religious and spiritual commitment are not at odds to our lifestyle. It helps to find a spiritual way for those who are lost and feel the need.
Helminiak carefully looks at spirituality in reference to sexuality without using religion or belief in a supreme deity. He explores the humanistic aspects and then at the Christian point of view on homosexuality and encourages us to become spiritual. Much of what he says are the very things I went through having been raised an Orthodox Jew and loving my religion yet not knowing where I fit in terms of my homosexuality.
He tells us that with a sense of commitment, life becomes that much easier to live and that this commitment is an essential part if our queer consciousness.
The book actually combines common sense, compassion and psychology and arrives at the conclusion that spirituality surely can enhance out lives. For myself, I would feel lost if I did not observe the Sabbath and the basic tenets of the Jewish religion. It is the beauty of the religion and the spirituality I get from it that gives me a sense of self-worth. Please note that I did not mention G-d because I am not sure that I need to,
For Christians, the author gives us a radical vision and this is enlightening. Helminiak looks at the major hurdles in gay life and addresses them as he deals with coming-out, gay marriage, AIDS, sexual ethics and more. He describes a spirituality that is not part of religious institutions. He also looks at the major mysteries of Christianity--those issues that cannot be understood--and shows what is behind them. He then shows that Catholicism condemns violence against us and in some cases has come out in our defense. Then he takes on Christian Fundamentalism and shows how it is not compatible with Christianity. He shows us how to look at the Bible differently and not at what it says but how it interprets what it says.
This is a book that will not only keep you thinking but will open your eyes and mind in ways that you have never thought possible. I heard the author speak this summer in Eureka Springs and he really blew me away. Here are some new thoughts to consider and evaluate. It is a fascinating book.