Helen Gurley Brown tells women how to fill their lives with romance and delectable men. Sexual attitudes may have changed, but the art of being a woman has not.
Sex and the Single Girl
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About the Author
Helen Gurley Brown became the Editor-in-Chief of Cosmopolitan in 1965. Since then the magazine's sales and advertising have risen spectacularly. For five years, she was voted by World Almanac one of the 25 Most Influential Women in the U.S. She is a widely-known television personality, having made frequent appearances on 20/20, 60 Minutes, Oprah Winfrey, Entertainment Tonight, Larry King, and many others.
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114 of 117 people found the following review helpful
By Mona Clee
Format:Paperback
Isn't that an odd thing to say about a book whose title starts with the word "sex?"
Well, around 1964 one of my parents brought this book home, although neither of them would ever confess to the deed. Whoever it was, they did me a big favor. When the folks weren't watching, I swiped the book and devoured it in a single long sitting.
Helen Gurley Brown should have entitled this masterwork "All the Hard-Nosed Things that Young Women in the So-Called Pre-Feminist Era Need to Know about Money, Career, Independence, Women's Rights, and The Way Things Unfortunately Are. And Oh Yes, Sex. That." However, the book would undoubtedly have sold fewer copies if the title had truly reflected the contents, so it's just as well they hyped the sex part.
Under the impression that I was going to get to read some really naughty stuff, I studied Brown's book with the intensity I would later reserve for pre-calculus. Brown was the friendly, more experienced adult ("Aunt Helen," I liked to think of her) who cut the BS and told you how it really was with respect to a number of important subjects, often contradicting the messages of the dominant 60's culture, as it materialized later in the decade.
Money? Girl, Woodstock or not, you will need it when you are no longer "pristinely young," so get a career and earn it. You will appreciate the freedom and self-respect it brings you. Do the very best you can with whatever abilities you have and the education you can get, and the rewards will carry you through the inevitable bad times that everybody faces. Beauty? Even if you are gorgeous, don't put all your eggs in that basket, because your beauty will fade, and then where will you be if that's the only card you ever played? Love? It is NOT all you need, no matter what the Beatles say. Marriage? Fine, fabulous (Brown herself has been married over forty years), but don't pin all your reasons for living - or your financial survival -- on a guy. Guys are just fallible human beings. Don't give up your ability to stand on your own two feet when you fall in love, because there are no guarantees in life, ever. As Brown eloquently put it, in middle age (or at any time before) a man can leave a woman "like dishes in the sink" if he wants to badly enough. Exercise and a healthy diet? Essential to self-respect. Property ownership (or at least having a fine apartment)? Also essential, particularly when you get older; living in a garage apartment furnished with orange crates is cute when you're twenty, but pathetic when you're forty.
I came of age in the late 60's and early 70's, when the culture was telling us to tune in, turn on, and drop out. Don't conform, don't join the establishment, don't become the man or the woman in the gray flannel suit, don't throw away your life working and forget to smell the roses. Follow your dreams and the universe will magically provide.
This was good advice as far as it went. It sounded so great, and it really was well meant and idealistic and heartfelt...if only it had been true. Unfortunately, it should have been taken with a small but healthy dose of skepticism. Such as, yes, do follow your dreams, but along the way learn some marketable skills, okay? However, the cultural mindset discouraged us from planning for the future, or thinking seriously about money, financial issues, and practical things. We might have known with our minds that the Woodstock generation would eventually get much, much older, but we didn't believe it.
I, however, had Aunt Helen whispering in my ear, so around age thirty I finally rolled up my sleeves, quit hanging out in Austin drinking dark beer and swimming in Barton Springs, and got an advanced degree and a good job -- but did plan things so I still had some time to smell the roses. I couldn't have done it without her advice. At the end of the day, although Brown was not considered a "real" feminist, and in fact came in for a great deal of scorn on that account, she helped me every bit as much as the rest of them.
She wasn't into rhetoric, ideology, or internecine wars with the sisters, she just gave good hardheaded advice about the way things were, like it or not, that's city hall so just deal with it. She liked men. They were people, they had their problems, but generally they were pretty nice. This was quite a relief to those of us who liked them too, even though there were times when it wasn't politically correct to dwell on it. She just didn't believe that liking men required her to give up everything else worthwhile in life, or her ability to provide for herself.
Yeah yeah, like just about everybody else I take issue with her rather Darwinian attitude about carrying on with married men. However, as the writer Molly Ivins would say, she had the guts to tell young women how the cow ate the cabbage. I honor her for that.
Well, around 1964 one of my parents brought this book home, although neither of them would ever confess to the deed. Whoever it was, they did me a big favor. When the folks weren't watching, I swiped the book and devoured it in a single long sitting.
Helen Gurley Brown should have entitled this masterwork "All the Hard-Nosed Things that Young Women in the So-Called Pre-Feminist Era Need to Know about Money, Career, Independence, Women's Rights, and The Way Things Unfortunately Are. And Oh Yes, Sex. That." However, the book would undoubtedly have sold fewer copies if the title had truly reflected the contents, so it's just as well they hyped the sex part.
Under the impression that I was going to get to read some really naughty stuff, I studied Brown's book with the intensity I would later reserve for pre-calculus. Brown was the friendly, more experienced adult ("Aunt Helen," I liked to think of her) who cut the BS and told you how it really was with respect to a number of important subjects, often contradicting the messages of the dominant 60's culture, as it materialized later in the decade.
Money? Girl, Woodstock or not, you will need it when you are no longer "pristinely young," so get a career and earn it. You will appreciate the freedom and self-respect it brings you. Do the very best you can with whatever abilities you have and the education you can get, and the rewards will carry you through the inevitable bad times that everybody faces. Beauty? Even if you are gorgeous, don't put all your eggs in that basket, because your beauty will fade, and then where will you be if that's the only card you ever played? Love? It is NOT all you need, no matter what the Beatles say. Marriage? Fine, fabulous (Brown herself has been married over forty years), but don't pin all your reasons for living - or your financial survival -- on a guy. Guys are just fallible human beings. Don't give up your ability to stand on your own two feet when you fall in love, because there are no guarantees in life, ever. As Brown eloquently put it, in middle age (or at any time before) a man can leave a woman "like dishes in the sink" if he wants to badly enough. Exercise and a healthy diet? Essential to self-respect. Property ownership (or at least having a fine apartment)? Also essential, particularly when you get older; living in a garage apartment furnished with orange crates is cute when you're twenty, but pathetic when you're forty.
I came of age in the late 60's and early 70's, when the culture was telling us to tune in, turn on, and drop out. Don't conform, don't join the establishment, don't become the man or the woman in the gray flannel suit, don't throw away your life working and forget to smell the roses. Follow your dreams and the universe will magically provide.
This was good advice as far as it went. It sounded so great, and it really was well meant and idealistic and heartfelt...if only it had been true. Unfortunately, it should have been taken with a small but healthy dose of skepticism. Such as, yes, do follow your dreams, but along the way learn some marketable skills, okay? However, the cultural mindset discouraged us from planning for the future, or thinking seriously about money, financial issues, and practical things. We might have known with our minds that the Woodstock generation would eventually get much, much older, but we didn't believe it.
I, however, had Aunt Helen whispering in my ear, so around age thirty I finally rolled up my sleeves, quit hanging out in Austin drinking dark beer and swimming in Barton Springs, and got an advanced degree and a good job -- but did plan things so I still had some time to smell the roses. I couldn't have done it without her advice. At the end of the day, although Brown was not considered a "real" feminist, and in fact came in for a great deal of scorn on that account, she helped me every bit as much as the rest of them.
She wasn't into rhetoric, ideology, or internecine wars with the sisters, she just gave good hardheaded advice about the way things were, like it or not, that's city hall so just deal with it. She liked men. They were people, they had their problems, but generally they were pretty nice. This was quite a relief to those of us who liked them too, even though there were times when it wasn't politically correct to dwell on it. She just didn't believe that liking men required her to give up everything else worthwhile in life, or her ability to provide for herself.
Yeah yeah, like just about everybody else I take issue with her rather Darwinian attitude about carrying on with married men. However, as the writer Molly Ivins would say, she had the guts to tell young women how the cow ate the cabbage. I honor her for that.
17 of 17 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
I read this book when I was 15 years old. I think one must read this book in the context of the social atmosphere of the 1960s. Consider first, what it meant to be a single woman before feminism really took off in the United States. Most of her advice is very sound: Educate yourself, dress well for your budget, personalize your look, maintain your hair and make-up, read and feel free to experience life.
Some of her advice, I think, is borderline-psychotic. In this book, Helen Gurley Brown encourages the single woman to "lift" things like lipstick and nailpolish from the dime store. She also stands by "The wine diet"...basically telling girls to drink wine instead of eating, to maintain a lithe figure. This, in my opinion, is insane. She also advises using dry shampoo. But, remember, this was back in a time where women didn't wash their own hair. They would go to the beauty salon once a week for a "wash & set" to lacquer their hair into unmovable shape.
While reading this book, keep in mind that feminism really hadn't swept the country, and affairs between executives and their office assistants was expected...regardless of marital status. I don't think "Sexual Harrasment" became a public issue until after this book was published.
Read this book with a grain of salt. Even though a good chunk of her advice is out-of-date, some of it is sound and rational. It's a great snap-shot of the 1960s pre-feminist mindset.
Some of her advice, I think, is borderline-psychotic. In this book, Helen Gurley Brown encourages the single woman to "lift" things like lipstick and nailpolish from the dime store. She also stands by "The wine diet"...basically telling girls to drink wine instead of eating, to maintain a lithe figure. This, in my opinion, is insane. She also advises using dry shampoo. But, remember, this was back in a time where women didn't wash their own hair. They would go to the beauty salon once a week for a "wash & set" to lacquer their hair into unmovable shape.
While reading this book, keep in mind that feminism really hadn't swept the country, and affairs between executives and their office assistants was expected...regardless of marital status. I don't think "Sexual Harrasment" became a public issue until after this book was published.
Read this book with a grain of salt. Even though a good chunk of her advice is out-of-date, some of it is sound and rational. It's a great snap-shot of the 1960s pre-feminist mindset.
9 of 9 people found the following review helpful
By A Customer
Format:Paperback
For someone like myself who has grown up with "everything is relative, make your own way, be yourself etc etc" you may be craving advice that doesn't just "sit on the fence."
This book is like having a naughty aunt whisper in your ear the "real facts" of life, love, men, apartments, food. Some advice may be a little dated, but curiously, not as much as you think.
My favourite quote, and there are many of them, is "When you work for toads, drain the pond..." I've repeated this to myself
many times in my first serious job after university working for loser macho men - and that's in a supposedly more "enlightened post-feminist" 2004!
I sincerely hope Helen is still living life to the fullest. It's a fun read.
Most Recent Customer Reviews
2.0 out of 5 stars
Not what I expected
Helen Gurley Brown (rest her soul) may have been considered one of the original feminists, but I find her book superficial and out dated, all of the advice she gives is just about... Read more
Published 10 days ago by Colette
5.0 out of 5 stars
Worth a read
There are actually a few pearls of wisdom scattered throughout the tons of downright immature, unhealthy, depressing, unscrupulous views on life. Read more
Published 24 days ago by waters
3.0 out of 5 stars
Sometimes dated, sometimes not, sometimes funny
This 1960's advice book is ironically the most dated on the topic of men; the author says "you need a man every step of the way", and it appeared to be for freeloading and boosting... Read more
Published 2 months ago by Roberta Moore
5.0 out of 5 stars
Sex and the Single Girl
Amazing book! This was Sex and the City before the show. This book definitely get you thinking about women and dating.
Published 3 months ago by S. Cunningham
3.0 out of 5 stars
Know What To Expect from this book
I didn't buy this book, someone gave it to me with a bunch of other self help books. I just randomly read most of it during a car ride. Read more
Published 4 months ago by seeker of knowledge
4.0 out of 5 stars
Not a 'must read' but an enjoyable trip in time
This book is a classic and if you're from a younger generation who did not live in the 60's, it provides an interesting insight into women's world during those times. Read more
Published 5 months ago by A. P. Nessel
3.0 out of 5 stars
Entertaining
This book is as funny as I expected. I am surprised that most of her messages and advice still apply 50 years later.
Published 6 months ago by bm323
5.0 out of 5 stars
single and fabulous
I found Sex and the Single Girl to be a fun guide to dating and feeling fabulous as a single person. Read more
Published 7 months ago by bookaholic
4.0 out of 5 stars
Still relevant after all these years
My first encounter with this work was a long time ago...when it was first published and I was just moving into young adulthood, recently married and unclear about what was ahead. Read more
Published 8 months ago by Margaret H. Huyck
1.0 out of 5 stars
Stick With Candace Bushnell...
Couldn't get through it. It was like reading one of those long e-mails friends send you when they're thinking out loud with total disregard to the fact that what they're saying has... Read more
Published 24 months ago by BookWorm
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