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Sexual Fluidity: Understanding Women's Love and Desire [Hardcover]

Lisa M. Diamond (Author)
3.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (15 customer reviews)


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Book Description

0674026241 978-0674026247 February 28, 2008

Is love "blind" when it comes to gender? For women, it just might be. This unsettling and original book offers a radical new understanding of the context-dependent nature of female sexuality. Lisa Diamond argues that for some women, love and desire are not rigidly heterosexual or homosexual but fluid, changing as women move through the stages of life, various social groups, and, most important, different love relationships.

This perspective clashes with traditional views of sexual orientation as a stable and fixed trait. But that view is based on research conducted almost entirely on men. Diamond is the first to study a large group of women over time. She has tracked one-hundred women for more than ten years as they have emerged from adolescence into adulthood. She summarizes their experiences and reviews research ranging from the psychology of love to the biology of sex differences. Sexual Fluidity offers moving first-person accounts of women falling in and out of love with men or women at different times in their lives. For some, gender becomes irrelevant: "I fall in love with the person, not the gender," say some respondents.

Sexual Fluidity offers a new understanding of women's sexuality--and of the central importance of love.

(20071029)

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Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Many women experience a fluid sexual desire that is responsive to a person rather then a specific gender, argues Diamond n this fascinating and certain to be controversial study. Diamond, associate professor of psychology and gender studies at the University of Utah, is best when detailing, with vivid examples, how scientific studies of sexual desire and behavior have focused on the experience of men, for whom the heterosexual/homosexual divide seems mostly fixed. Diamond says traditional labels for sexual desire are inadequate; for some women even bisexual does not truly express the protean nature of their sexuality. Diamond details in accessible and nuanced language her own study of 100 young women (by her own admission not fully representative) over a period of 10 years. She says that she is calling for an expanded understanding of same-sex sexuality that could radically affect both LGBT activists who hold that sexual identity is fixed and antigay groups who believe sexuality is chosen. Sexual fluidity involves a mix of internal and external factors, but is not, Diamond emphasizes, a matter of conscious choice, and she speculates that a younger generation that views sexuality as personal rather than political might embrace this less rigid view. (Feb.)
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

Review

Fascinating and certain to be controversial...Diamond says traditional labels for sexual desire are inadequate; for some women even "bisexual" does not truly express the protean nature of their sexuality. Diamond details in accessible and nuanced language her own study of 100 young women (by her own admission not "fully representative") over a period of 10 years. She says that she is "calling for an expanded understanding of same-sex sexuality" that could radically affect both LGBT activists who hold that sexual identity is fixed and antigay groups who believe sexuality is chosen. (Publishers Weekly 20080417)

Captivating, nuanced, and rigorous...Diamond's work is vital precisely because sexual fluidity is not a new concept--Freud called his version "polymorphous perversity"--but merely one that is typically dismissed. Nor is it news to women, particularly not to a generation for whom a nonspecific "queer" affiliation, or no affiliation at all, is increasingly common. What is so important is not that this fluidity exists, but that someone has finally paid it systematic attention and found that it is in fact not the exception, but may well be the rule. (Hanne Blank Ms. 20090805)

Traditionally, female sexuality has been presumed to work in the same way and by the same rules as male sexual identity, but Diamond argues that for women, sexual identity isn't fixed in the same categories. (Temma Ehrenfeld Psychologies 20090301)

Setting out to prove the theory that, for some women, love is truly blind where gender is concerned, Diamond presents her evidence in a fascinating, anecdotal fashion--by tracking over the span of a decade the relationships of nearly 100 women who at one point or another had experienced "same-sex attractions." The women move from men to women and back again (or vice-versa), their sexual identity as changeable as their desires. Additionally, she delves into the brain science behind lust, love and infatuation, revealing that what draws women toward a particular partner is as much a function of biology as it is anything else. To her credit, Diamond avoids scripting her arguments in obtuse academese. With her compassionate, understated approach, she has stepped up the business of gender research. (Lily Burana Washington Post Book World )

A fascinating read. (Times Higher Education Supplement )

The book has many riveting accounts by women of their own experiences of sexual attraction and distraction...Diamond has written a fascinating book. (Adam Phillips London Review of Books )

[Diamond] did something unique, following 100 female subjects with same-sex attractions for 10 years...Her book is worth reading. (Sheela Lambert examiner.com )

Diamond's study has the potential to lead to more acceptance of variety within sexual orientation. With young women leading the way, everyone will become less fearful of diverse sexual experiences. Sexual Fluidity can take us beyond the divisive language of "phases" and "denial" as we speak the truth of our lives to each other. (Ellyn Ruthstrom Women's Review of Books )

Product Details

  • Hardcover: 352 pages
  • Publisher: Harvard University Press (February 28, 2008)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0674026241
  • ISBN-13: 978-0674026247
  • Product Dimensions: 8.4 x 5.9 x 1.3 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1.2 pounds
  • Average Customer Review: 3.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (15 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #660,224 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

15 Reviews
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Average Customer Review
3.8 out of 5 stars (15 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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32 of 35 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Getting it straight!, February 18, 2008
By 
Dr. Joe Kort "(www.JoeKort.com)" (Royal Oak, Michigan United States) - See all my reviews
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This review is from: Sexual Fluidity: Understanding Women's Love and Desire (Hardcover)
Lisa Diamond does a great job breaking down the differences between sexual orientation, sexual identiy, sexual behavior and sexual fantasies. Her work is an important contribution to the growing body of knowledge that people do not always fit into the straight, gay or even bisexual categories.

I highly recommend this book.
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33 of 37 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Very intereting discussion of female sexuality, August 5, 2008
By 
This review is from: Sexual Fluidity: Understanding Women's Love and Desire (Hardcover)
This book is a very interesting read for any woman, queer or straight.

The discussion of the to-date research on female sexuality and major premises in sexuality research are a great overview resource for anyone interested in this topic.

Female sexuality and the discussions stemming from Diamond's research are described in an approachable way. Topics stemming out of this book will force queer and straight women to rethink their perception of sexuality and their experiences.

I'd bet this book will stand the test of time and will provide a good resource for female sexuality discussions.
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16 of 16 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars LUGs are Women Too!, May 18, 2010
By 
William P. Mcneill (Seattle, Washington USA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
Starting in the mid-1990s, Diamond, a professor of Psychology and Gender Studies at the University of Utah, conducted a longitudinal study that tracked sexual attitudes among a cohort of non-heterosexual identified women from their late teens into their early thirties. From this work Diamond concluded that while a model of sexual orientation in which a person is unswervingly straight or gay may be appropriate for men, it is too rigid for women. Over the course of a few years, a typical woman in Diamond's study might move from being attracted to other women to being attracted to men, or vice versa, with the nature of the attraction dependent on an individual's circumstances and partner in ways that often rendered simple straight/lesiban/bisexual categorizations too coarse to be informative. This fluidity is not a matter of dilettantish sexual experimentation or repressed lesbianism in the face of homophobia. (Nor, contrary to the wishes of religious traditionalists, does it mean that sexuality is a conscious lifestyle choice that can be reset by bullying therapy.) Instead, Diamond contends, it is a natural course of many women's development which has been overlooked by both the general public and researchers into human sexuality.

"Sexual Fluidity" mixes a discussion of Diamond's statistical results and anecdotes about the women she studied, along with theoretical taxonomies of female attraction styles and speculation on why women would be more fluid than men. It is academically rigorous but still pitched at a lay audience. It's a credit to her work that you come away wishing that Diamond could broaden her research to older women, straight-identified women, and men. The only shortcoming is that the book only presents quantitative data in prose, which can be difficult to follow. Presumably people who really care about the statistics can look up Diamond's journal articles, but a few bar charts would have still gone a long way.

All in all, Diamond's findings are not surprising to anyone young enough to have been dating women since the 1990s. (I'm one of those people--I discovered this book because an old girlfriend was one of Diamond's subjects--and the descriptions of sexual fluidity so neatly fit almost every woman I've been involved with I found myself getting surprisingly sentimental over what is basically a dry research precis.) Still, it's nice to see one's informal impressions in print with research to back it up. "Sexual Fluidity" is both a compelling study of women's sexual nature and an interesting snapshot of society's evolving attitude towards the same.
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