Customer Reviews

In the Shadows of the Net: Breaking Free of Compulsive Online Sexual Behavior

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My marriage ended because of my addiction to cybersex.

I am finally on the path to a new life. Therapy and a 12-step group are the key to recovery for me. I have found this book to be an amazingly valuable resource. Many of the other sexual addiction books are too broad... discussing many kinds of sexual addiction that I do not suffer from. But this book speaks directly to me.

If you have a problem with internet pornography, or even think you do, I reccomend this book. It paints a clear picture of your problem, and helps you begin to be honest with yourself about the extent of your problem. This is not psychobabble or uninformed "self-help" garbage. This book offers specific steps to recovery. You'll find that you cannot recover on your own (something I tried many times, but failed). Get this book -- you'll be happy you did.

The Internet is a fascinating place, but for too many people, it is also fraught with danger, as they are sex addicts, and the Internet can become a sex addict's paradise. This book was highly readable, not too complex but didn't talk down to the reader, and includes exercises to help the cybersex addict get started on his/her recovery. If it has a flaw, it is that the authors' definition of sobriety is a little murky. Still, this is a very helpful book, with plenty of examples from real-life addicts. Should be read by everyone who compulsively uses the Internet for sexual gratification.

Like 100s of 1000s of other internet junkies--it is a legitimate
heartbreaking problem for people and their partners. Carnes has this book and several other highly recommended books that you MUST buy and you must find a therapist or local SLAA [Sex & Love Addicts Anonymous] Group to help you deal with it. What is IT? Cyber-sex addiction. Internet addiction. Cyber-chat addiction. Or compulsion or pre-occupation. Excellent book my wife and I read as we worked out our problems and we cannot recommend it enough. Don't fool yourself, this [cyber-sex, internet addiction] is a horrible problem that will just get worse as the internet [pulls] more innocent people in. Our society is being changed by this cyber-sex junk and not changed for the better. Every week we hear of another news report of someone murdered or abused by someone they met in a chatroom, we hear of another friend or acquaintance whose marriage borke apart because of it...we see trust destroyed or people shattered by this plague and so far only a few religious, psychologists and/or sociologists have recognized this growing problem, Dr. Carnes has been on the cutting edge and opened up the truth about it. Do yourself a favor and get this book.

This book is a good starting resource for anyone who's concerned with their time on the Internet, or sex addiction in general. There's only a couple of problems I've had with the book. Mostly, it's catagorizing of addiction seems exceptionally broad. I think any normal person could argue they had an addiction problem using the criteria listed within.

Also, the book is titled breaking free, but seems reluctant to assist in that endeavor. Instead, it throws out a few common sense ideas, and then recommends you seek professional help. Well, if that's what you're looking for, let me save you the cost of this book. "You, are in need of professional help. A book cannot help you." There, the overall morale of this title in one easy, free sentance.

This is a great resource for people dealing with online sexual compulsive addictions. Whether its you or someone you love, this book helps navigate through the confusion associated with the addictive behaviors. Many books just touch on the subject, but this one really focuses solely on the topic. It covers everything from diagnosis to recovery. Patrick Carnes is a straight forward, no nonsense Dr. The book is well written and a fast read, no need for a PhD in order to understand it. Finally a book that offers hope and relief! I'm greatful to have found it.

This is a fantastic book that takes the reader into a detailed explanatation of what this addiction really is. Mr. Carnes explains the factors and processes that affect the addict by also giving examples of behavior and describing patient's stories. For those trying to get a more comprehensive understanding of the addiction as well as the issues that prevent an addict from freeing him or herself of it, this book is excellent.

Just one note of caution: As much as this book as well as others by the same author are great resources, they are not enough. As with every addiction, there is a "cleansing" process that must be followed, and should be guided under the supervision of an experienced professional. Also, people in this addiction should seek a support group, such as the SLAA.

As the spouse of an internet-porn addict,this book explained exactly how I felt and helped me to understand how my spouse felt when he was trapped in the Net. The best part about this book is the explanation of how the difficult journey to freedom will be worth more than the temporary and ultimately devastating "high" that users are addicted to. It also shows users how this seemingly harmless pastime can lead users to become someone they don't know or never thought they could become-doing things that stand against their own moral standards. It is brilliant.

This book is up-to-date on a topic that until more recently went unrecognized as problematic. It can be beneficial for professionals working with a client population that participates in a variety of compulsive or addictive online sexual behaviors and who would like to reduce or eliminate these compulsions and addictive behaviors. It can also be recommended to clients for their own use. It helps in determining if a problem exists with use of a screening test, how to set up healthy boundaries, and help with relapse prevention. It can be especially beneficial when paired with a workbook on breaking free of compulsive online sexual behaviors. This book, by reputable authors, provides information & help designed especially for this population and for professionals attempting to help.

This is a very useful book if you have a problem, or even think you might, with regard to compulsively searching for and/or using internet porn, chat rooms, etc.

I would also like to mention, in light of the fact that one of the authors, David Delmonico,Ph.D., lives here in Pittsburgh, that there is an active SLAA (Sex & Love Addicts Anonymous) that can help individuals break this addiction and find a new, happier, healthier way of living. It can be contacted through http://www.wpa-slaa.org

Readers in other areas can contact Fellowship Wide Services at [...]

To everyone reading this now, I'd just like to leave with the thought that life CAN get better. And you don't have to try and change for the rest of your life. You only have to try to do better for today....

This book was somewhat helpful. I definitely think it helped solve some of our problems.