Customer Reviews

Sheltering Thoughts: About Loss and Grief

5 star:		(6)
4 star:		(0)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

At a time when my friends are losing their parents and even siblings and spouses, I often find I am at a loss for the right words to say. Sheltering Thoughts is a book with those words. The author's comments and the quotations she has included from others offer exppressions of peace, comfort, and encouragement for those who are sad and discouraged. Its words encourage those greiving to celebrate the life of their loved one as well as their own. A great gift to send instead of a card or to include in a gift basket with other comforting items.

Sheltering Thoughts brings validation,comfort and peace...as well as hope. This book transcends the boundaries of gender, age, race and religion with a message for every reader. An excellent remembrance for a friend or family member as they cope with a loss.

Sheltering Thoughts is a gem!! This little book brings great comfort and hope to those who mourn. Turn to any page and find an uplifting thought or something to hold onto in a time of grief and loss. When you just don't know what to do to help someone who has lost a loved one, give this book.

Like most `Baby Boomers', I find myself at more funerals than weddings lately, so (following the suggestion of an earlier reviewer) I have started keeping a couple of copies of Sheltering Thoughts on hand and at the ready. I never know what to say at funerals (what can you say?), so I simply give this gift book filled with words of comfort, support and peace. The author's hospice and family therapist experiences and sensitivities are evident in her tasteful assembly of sayings, poems, and lyrics and in her own personal comments as well. When I read it myself, I found it to be a very moving read that stimulated a surprisingly peaceful contemplation of my own mortality.

One of the things I like most about this book is the feedback I get from the recipients. Different people are comforted by, and hence remember, different passages but the book seems to be appropriate for anyone regardless of their religious beliefs (or non-beliefs), and in that delicate regard this book is a safe and universal gift.

The appreciation from recipients (three so far) has been heart-felt and they said that they too will give it as a gift when the situation arises. It appears that Sheltering Thoughts fills a void not addressed by the traditional bereavement approaches. It is more distinctive, intimate and lasting than a card or flowers, and it is easy to mail when I cannot attend personally. It was written just in time for my generation.

This book is a wonderful tool for those of us who are "challenged" when it comes to providing emotional support to others at a time of loss and desire to do more than give/send garden variety bereavement cards. Because the book is spiritually uplifting rather than oriented towards religious beliefs and teachings, it is appropriate for giving to everyone from business associates to close friends and loved ones. A nice touch is a page near the beginning of the book where the sender can dedicate the book to an individual's memory.

I wish I had a copy of "Sheltering Thoughts" to read after my dad died. His sudden passing was confusing and numbing to me and all of my family.

I now keep this collection of inspirational thoughts close at hand. Its passages continue to give me a great deal of comfort whenever I'm missing Dad.

This book is my first recommendation to anyone experiencing the deep feelings of grief and loss.

Sharon Gilchrest O'Neill has assembled a collection of thoughts, quotations, and short exercises about grieving, inspired by work with the Connecticut Hospice, Inc. Each page contains a single thought or quotation, or a chance to express the reader's own thoughts or feelings about a particular topic. The book is divided into sections like Memories, Treasured Possessions, Happiness...Sadness, but it's sometimes unclear how the pages in each section relate to the section topic.

What struck me most about the book was that it would offer someone mired in the chaos of grief short bursts of thought, not requiring sustained reading or focused attention. For someone looking for a narrative thread, or a unifying philosophy, this book is not the place to look. I couldn't help but contrast it with Joan Didion's Year of Magical Thinking, a treatise on Didion's own process of grief, of working through the stages of feeling, thought, and emotion.

O'Neill's book, in contrast to Didion's treatise-like work, gives us bursts of thought, short quotations, and the chance to jot down a few of our own thoughts. About the quotations: I am often disconcerted by quotations in a book like this, where people are quoted out of context, and the reader is given nothing to put the quotation in context. Sometimes the quote is from someone familiar, like Carl Jung or Sinclair Lewis. We may not all be familiar with Jung's or Lewis' work, but we have something of a framework in which to place them. We can find their writings, read their novels. But, who is John Gray, and how does he relate to the experience of grief?

The writings of the author seem to be designed to provoke movement in grief, to give the grieving person a different perspective, a way to begin to think about how life has changed, and will change more.

Armchair Interviews says: For someone who needs some inspiration, a sense that they are not alone in this experience, and a way to find brief, accessible musings on grief, this book could be very helpful.