- File Size: 850 KB
- Print Length: 215 pages
- Publisher: Shepherd Press (July 22, 2011)
- Publication Date: July 22, 2011
- Sold by: Amazon Digital Services LLC
- Language: English
- ASIN: B005GG6BYC
- Text-to-Speech: Enabled
- Word Wise: Not Enabled
- Lending: Not Enabled
- Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #15,151 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
|Print List Price:||$13.95|
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Shepherding a Child's Heart Kindle Edition
"1-2-3 Magic: Effective Discipline for Children 2-12"
Parenting tools to use in virtually every situation, from internationally renowned clinical psychologist Thomas Phelan. Learn more.
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Top Customer Reviews
The first half of the book breaks down what Tripp believes to be "foundations for child rearing." In this section, he writes about short and long term goals in raising children and about methods, biblical and unbiblical, for accomplishing them. The second half of the book focuses on the stages of childhood and the objectives and techniques unique to each stage.
Much of this book is excellent. Discipline, the brunt of the book, is not punitive, but restorative. Tripp rightly clarifies that a child's disobedience is rebellion against God and against His command to honor and obey one's parents, and he urges parents to help their children understand this concept. Understanding this opens a door for parents to talk about grace and our need of Christ's supernatural strength to do what He calls us to do. The focus of discipline is not on changing behavior, but addressing a child's heart. The "why" of behavior is weighted far more heavily than the "what."
There are two major flaws in the book, in my opinion. The first is the lack of control that the author gives a child over his own life . Up until the teenage years, parents are urged to make all decisions and to assert authority simply to teach a child submission. Tripp maintains that "when we allow our children to become independent decision makers we give them a false idea of liberty and a mistaken notion of freedom.Read more ›
Well, yes there is. I'll give this book a solid three stars, and here's why, from a free thinking Christian perspective (I'd like to think).
First of all, contrary to some of the more hysterical one-star reviewers, experiencing a few moments of sting from the buttocks is not the worst thing that can happen to a child, and it's not child abuse or perverted. It's what's happened to untold millions of children throughout history who became adults who contributed to their civilizations.
I believe the dominant form of child abuse occuring in our culture today is neglect. Leaving a child on his or her own to grow up as an undisciplined, untrustworthy narcissist is a far greater abuse to a child than the "spankings" it might have took at an early age to teach a child accountability.
Tripp's "spanking doctrine" is described within a context of communication and consistency, and within that context makes sense. Children are often irrational, and often don't respond to complex psychological manipulation techniques or reasoned negotiation. Spanking to me is a last resort. I think I've spanked one of my two sons an average of once a year, and not out of venting rage but because at the time there was nothing else I could do to end a bad situation.
Truth be told, I'd likely be a better person than I am today if I'd been raised according to all the principles described in this book. Hurts to write that, but there it is.
However, the author's biblical mandate for spanking is just plain poor logic.Read more ›
Tripp gives some very practical advice to this end: how to recognise the "teachable moments", how to spank, the problems with strategies that don't work (e.g. bargaining or bribery). He also makes it clear that discipline only works in an atmosphere of trust and communication. I was very pleasantly surprised to see someone agree with me that in a situation where you "know" your child has done something wrong, but you don't have the evidence to prove it, the right thing to do is to encourage honesty on their part, but if necessary to let them get by with it, rather than acting on a presupposition that might be wrong and injuring the trust between parent and child. He also writes a good bit about parenting goals and strategies for different age groups (from toddlerhood to teenage).
The book does have its flaws, though. The most serious is that Tripp does not do a sufficient job of setting the context of what we are about in parenting. Doug Wilson's Standing on the Promises does that well, and should be viewed as a necessary companion to this book.Read more ›
Most Recent Customer Reviews
Bought this for my daughter and she loved it. Didn't agree with everything but the main point of the book is not to look at the child's actions but look at the heart. Read morePublished 3 days ago by CDH
The book is simply stated. The word of God is the only way to correct a child's behavior. Help them to see that their behavior is sin and encourage them by using appropriate... Read morePublished 4 days ago by Robert H. Schmidt
I recommend this book to every Christian because even if you do not have children of your own, you will be in contact with children. Read morePublished 15 days ago
pretty good book if you are a strong christian parent, however if you are not for corporal punishment, this may be hard to swallow. Read morePublished 17 days ago by freepeacelove
Ahhhhhhh if only I had read this when our children were small. I would recommend this in a heart beat. You are teaching your children in a way that is good. Read morePublished 23 days ago by AMP
This is a great tool for raising children. My sister used this with her two girls and they are lovely children.Published 1 month ago by Mommy Marmar
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