Customer Reviews

Showgirls, Teen Wolves, and Astro Zombies: A Film Critic's Year-Long Quest to Find the Worst Movie Ever Made

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Michael Adams shows us that darkness in all its cheapness. This book is his entertaining diary of watching bad films for a year (a movie a day, that's all we ask).

If you like these kinds of psychotronic movies like me, you'll enjoy this book. Adams has a knack for synopsizing films in a paragraph or two. The book also has a lot of interviews with filmmakers and actors. (But I am beginning to wonder how much more study shlock cinema needs.)

Movies like those of Ed Wood (which Adams discusses in detail) are famous because they're interesting despite their cheapness. But a lot of the movies Adams watched are famous only for being bad. And some of them aren't famous at all and should stay that way.

We also learn about Adams's new career as a movie reviewer on Australian TV and his new family life with his wife and baby daughter. Adams strikes a good balance between talking about movies and his family. It's clear his life is at a turning point and that this project is connected to it.

We get some film history, too. Thomas Edison was the first American exploitation filmmaker with The Kiss (1896, remade in 1900).

Adams is very generous in mentioning others who've written on this subject, like Kevin Murphy from Mystery Science Theater 3000 (A Year at the Movies: One Man's Filmgoing Odyssey) and film critic Jonathan Rosenbaum.

Doris Wishman, one of the first female film directors in Hollywood (who directed Nude on the Moon), said, "All movies are exploitation movies." (For an interesting essay on Doris Wishman, read Science Fiction America: Essays on Sf Cinema.)

These movies are never going away. As a character in Evil Brain from Outer Space said: "It's imperative that we destroy it. But to do so won't be easy--it's indestructible."

There are countless publications about bad and good-bad films (as a B- through Z-grade cinema enthusiast and co-creator of a zine called I Love Bad Movies, I've read my fair share). Many of them are very good, but Adams' book stands out by turning his adventure to find the worst-ever into a sort of narrative, weaving in little bits of personal anecdotes (hosting a movie review TV show; pushing a long-in-development script; fitting the time-consuming Quest into an otherwise normal life). He also brings in bits of conversations with luminaries like George Romero, John Waters, Razzies founder John Wilson, and Kevin Murphy of MST3K, as well as snippets from his extensive research to flesh out our knowledge and appreciation of these films.

But the part of Adams' structure that makes this book so interesting to me is his subdivision of all the candidate films into thoughtfully grouped (and quirkily named) categories such as "Eszterhas of Pain," "Gorilla Snore Fare," and "That's Travolting!" Each of these sections is a mini-chapter of its own, usually containing two to five films with a connecting star, filmmaker, character, plot, or theme. A lot of people can tell you their opinion of the worst movie ever made, but Adams can authoritatively identify the worst movie ever made about Bigfoot, or point out Bo Derek's cheesiest, nakedest performance. Breaking the book into these chunks was a smart move, making it easy to read as much or as little as I'd like before I go back to pretending to be a productive human being. The range of films also ensures that there's something for almost everyone - Adams' lineup never skews toward any one type of film, instead covering anything from classic b-movie to contemporary flop, in genres from sci-fi to rom-com, made by anyone from anonymous auteurs with video cameras to Big Name directors with studio backing.

I honestly had a blast reading this book. Though Adams does make some final picks, the thrill is in the journey. Each film is written up in what feels like exactly the right length; some of the clunkier duds get only a brief description, while the meatier, weirder, more fun movies get hilarious mini-essays. Adams' skill with a pun is unbelievable - his refreshingly clever plays on words practically fill the book, turning me into an out-loud guffawer on more than one subway train. And the best part is, we don't even have to watch all of these hundreds of movies to know which ones are the best-worst, now that Adams has done it for us. My copy is heavily earmarked with a bent corner every few pages, turning it into an easily accessible reference of the most enjoyably atrocious films ever made.

And really, if you're buying a book about bad movies, isn't that exactly what you want?

This may be a book about the worst films ever made but this is one of the best books I've read about film.
Michael Adams entertainingly describes a year of watching one dreadful film a day, a game he calls Bad Movie Bingo. After extensive research, Adams, the reviews editor for the film magazine Empire, compiles a list of the worst films ever made and watches them in an order dictated by a toy bingo machine.
A book about bad films could be written in a negative way and result in a depressing read. But Adams' humour and knowledge results in a jolly and intelligent review of cinema's forgotten flops. His writing style is lively and funny - "My salary is about what Jennifer Aniston got for blinking in one episode of Friends", he quips when talking about his new television review job.
The famously bad films are included - such as Gigli, Showgirls and Shanghai Surprise. But Adams' homework means he's also uncovered gems such as Superbabies ("utterly reviled") The Incredible Melting Man ("an oddity") and Howard the Duck ("much less fun that it sounds").
Warning: Adams' enthusiasm for bad movies could encourage you to watch some (I'm off to hunt down Rhinestone, with a singing Dolly Parton and Sly Stallone).

I immediately purchased this book after I heard the author on the South Florida radio show Paul and Young Ron. I love watching bad movies, so I was very excited to hear that someone else shared my interest. I love the story line as Michael Adams goes movie through movie - especially how he tries to get his family to watch some of them with him (I feel his pain!).

It's a great read for any movie buff. Everyone should watch bad movies just as much as good movies. It gives you a better perspective when someone does a good job.

Thanks for suffering Michael so we don't have to!
HippoJuiceMarie
[...]

I had a lot of fun reading this. There were a lot of films I had never seen or even heard of, which is a real accomplishment. Naturally, I had to check most of them out. Some of the films in here I would never go near, such as the films of Ulli Lommel, but many look harmless enough. I took some notes of titles and directors, but when I needed to check out specifics for each film/director, it became a difficult task. The book has no index to speak of. Finding a title to re-read about becomes an irritating chore. I am not goging to read this again, as much fun as it was. It's too bad because it was a fun read.

As a young lad, 25 or so years back, I read the Medved's seminal text on Golden Turkeys. So did the author of this book. While I merely graduated to seeking out bad movie sites on the internet, he became a film critic, and, one fateful year, decided to undertake to discover the worst movie ever made, and average watching one bad movie per day. Then, to top it all off, he wrote a book about it.

This is not a detailed review of each of 365 bad movies in about the same number of pages: it more deals in themes and genres, although occasionally a particular work will have more than a few paragraphs worth of discussion. Indeed, the responses of other people - including the author's toddler daughter, as well as some famous film industry figures - are as fun as the dissection of turkeys, turds and the simply dire. As an acolyte of bad movie lore, I was aware of most the films mentioned, and have even seen a few (some on purpose, some not). But there are whole levels - depths, rather - of which I was unaware: Uwe Boll, yes, Ulli Lommel, no. Simon Shaw, no. Kweisi Mfume's son...not in my wildest dreams.

Adams has staying power if nothing else, and somehow retains the ability to see flashes of competance - even brilliance - in otherwise tired, incompetant, or unfunded productions. As he says, no one sets out to make a bad movie, but it clear that indifference to the outcome may occasionally be relevant. Can there be such as thing as bad "art"? Or is that just a cover for a lack of talent?

The journey here is as important as the destination, and I can't spoil the outcome of this year long quixotic quest. This is a book for both bad movie novice - serving as a fine introduction and overview - and also for the more jaded bad movie lover, who will doubtless find something new and unknown here. I have only one quibble with this book: it does not cover Sextette at all, Mae West's last movie. It is mentioned, but not reviewed, which only goes to show that no matter how complete you are, there is always something new under the sun, and that there is something more here for Adams to look forward too.

The only thing I like better than reading about film is reading about BAD film. Michael Adams' does a stellar (if slightly dangerous) job in watching at least one bad film every day for a year in order to determine the answer to one of life's great puzzles; what IS the worst film ever made? Aside from the dud movies themselves, Adams also writes about film in general, film history, chats to some cinema greats and reminds us to be grateful for the patience of partners/husbands/ wives.(Maybe I should get Nat to read this.) A great read, and surely not the last word on the subject.

An excellent overview of the worst of cinema and how a movie with all the best intentions can go completely wrong, this is more thoughtful than I expected. While it's quite funny in mocking bad cinema, the author also ruminates on what makes a bad movie bad, the sad fates of many of these filmmakers and the joy of discovering that sometimes a film really can be a fun guilty pleasure. Unless, of course, it's The Black Devil Doll From Hell.

I heard about this book on the HippoJuice Podcast when Michael Adams called in to talk about bad movies. I thought I was the only person who loved Roadhouse for it's cringiness. But these guys were talking about movies I hadn't even heard of, so I decided to go and purchase the book and see what it was all about.
Michael has given me a new meaning to movie night. Thanks to his book, I refilled my Netflix account with movies he mentioned, and I'm having a blast watching them with my friends.
Great read for anyone who's really into movies, and I hope he writes another one soon!

This book is not about bad movies as one would expect from the title. It is mostly an autobiography written by a lazy man who fancies himself as a critic. He sits at home watching bad movies for a years and writing a paragraph or two on each. However, mostly he rambles on about his wife, daughter, "job", father, going out to eat, etc...It is like a tale told by a guy who lives in his Mom's basement and has too little social interaction with others besides his family. He does go to job interviews, auditions and write screenplays once in a while. However, who cares? If this book is any indication of his writing, he seriously needs to get a real 9 to 5 job outside his home.
Lots of his material is lifted from other books, he even uses the exact same words as other authors in his description of some of the movies.
I can only say this poor chap was looking to make a buck to support his family in the laziest way possible. Sitting on the couch most of the year watching movies and then typing into a computer about his feelings is pretty sad.
He can be funny occassionally but I suspect lots of these one-liners are from someone else's brain. One of the most copy and paste books I have ever read when it comes to the movie "reviews". I seriously doubt he even watched many of the films as his critiques are lifted out of other books.
I don't blame a guy wanting to support his family but this book makes his whole life look pathetic. He would have been much better off actually writing about the movies and leaving the boring and, I suspect, fake descriptions of his life out. I don't care about Clara, his wife or Ava, his daughter. Nor do I have any interest in his job search. If you like reading about boring people with movie descriptions shoe-horned in, this is the book for you. Otherwise, forget it. This book is as bad any Ed Wood "entertainment".