Customer Reviews

The Shy Child: Helping Children Triumph over Shyness

5 star:		(8)
4 star:		(0)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(1)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

In The Shy Child, Dr. Ward Swallow finally set my mind at ease about why my child is so shy and how much I can do about it. He validated my own instinct to accept shyness as a way of being that has its place in the world--and to resist forcing my child to completely change the personality she was born with. With acceptance as a jumping off point, he helped me get inside the mind of my shy child and to understand her reticence at last.

At the same time, Dr. Swallow acknowledges that it is crucial for my CHILD to understand shyness, as well. Shy children who don't get in touch with their inner "self-talk" can become depressed when they feel limited in what they want to do in life. The book's explicit, age-appropriate approaches to handling situations that cause anxiety in a shy child gave me confidence to talk directly to my child about shyness. I now think I can help her identify things she would like to do but thinks she can't, and to summon the courage to find success in situations that previously left her in tears.

I had previously read Zimbardo's book on shyness in children, and I was dismayed to find that it offers outdated psychological explanations for different personalities, making shyness seem like a disorder, rather than a personality type. I found Dr. Swallow's approach much more reasonable and I think it offers much more potential for liberating a shy child from self-reproach.

I spent a weekend reading and studying this book to help my 3-year-old daughter. I was able to use some of the techniques immediately, and saw immediate results. It was helpful to me, a somewhat shy person, and to my husband, a non-shy person. It really helps us to understand how she's feeling. It also helps us give her the tools to overcome some of her shyness. It's great, too, because it has suggestions for different age levels. It was quite rewarding as a parent to be able to help my daughter with her anxiety in certain situations. I would, and have, highly recommend this to ANYONE with a shy child. It is wonderful!

This is the most useful book I've read on any aspect of parenting. It is sensitively written with constructive suggestions on how to support your child at various stages of development. I'm so glad that I read this book when my son was five. It has changed how both he and I understand and respond to his shy nature. I cannot recommend this book highly enough.

I felt this book had some decent advice, but it was not detailed enough when it came to sharing specific examples. I was looking for something that would give me and my three-year-old son some ideas on how to handle leaving him at preschool when he'd cling on to me as if I were going to throw him into a lion's cage. Do you peel him off and leave? Do you sit on the sidelines with him still hanging on? How long should you plan on staying in the classroom? A week? A month? However long the child wants/needs you there? And when do you make the determination that he is not ready/ready for school?
I had SO MANY questions and was dismayed to discover this book, although shedding a lot of light on the shy child, gave too few answers on what to do in common situations.

I did not understand the previous review of Dr. Swallow's book. It did not appear to seek to present "medical evidence of shyness," but rather attempted to present practical suggestions to parents regarding the behavior of their shy children. I found this book to be very helpful....Thanx Dr. Swallow....changed my child's life.

My son is sensitive and has a harder time with strangers and new situations. This book helped me realize what he goes through and now I can try and help him deal with it better. Since he started a new preschool with older kids, he's become more outgoing and talks a lot more. Hurray! I think we will always have to help him with this as it's not something that will go away completely, but now we know what works and what makes it worse, so we feel so much better about it.

I also recommend "The Highly Sensitive Child" in conjunction with this book because there is a difference between being "sensitive" and "shy" and someone starting to figure it out may not know the differences. Good luck!

I used this book when I was desparate to find a way to treat my child who has selective mutism. The book was extremely helpful and provided easy to implement suggestions. My son is doing very well because of this book. This is particularly important because I had such a hard time finding a therapist for him and ended up doing this myself. Thank goodness for this book with its logical approach to a frequently overwhelming problem.

I didn't find this book that useful. I thought the analysis was pretty pedestrian and not that insightful but I was particularly distressed not to get more practical advice. A disappointment--if you are looking for concrete strategies to help your child's shyness, I would not recommend this book.

I used this book to treat my own shyness and depression. It was very effective.

I enjoy reading Dr. Swallow book, it contains great information, and the contents are explained well. Dr. Swallow should write more books, I come here today to find more books written by Dr. Swallow, but I found just this one. Well, I then want to recommend it.