Customer Reviews

The Shy Guy's Guide to Dating: The Best Places to Meet Women, the Ten Best Pickup Lines, How to Tell if She Likes You, Eleven Women to Avoid, Do's and ... What Girls Say...and What They Really Mean

5 star:		(8)
4 star:		(3)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(3)
1 star:		(6)

 

 

I believe that this book may be worthwhile for the guy who is outgoing with guys, but is shy with girls. That is, someone who has plenty of guy friends, but no girlfriend. However, for those of us who suffer from social anxiety and low self-esteem, this book doesn't have the answers. Mr. Dutter simply says to go up to a girl and start talking to her. If I could do that, I wouldn't have needed this book!

Dutter starts out the book with a great "I feel your pain" chapter that made me have high hopes for this book. However, the Dutter does not actually offer a way for a shy guy to overcome his shyness and go up to a pretty woman in a bar (let alone strike up a successful conversation with her). Instead, Dutter suggests waiting by the ladies room and letting women approach you, lowering your standards, and acting like "Clueless Guy" to convince women that you can't take care of yourself on your own. It's a bit entertaining at times, but certainly not helpful.

I don't even know where to begin to describe how worthless this boook is.

It's mainly a bunch of trite dribble that leaves you going "Well, duh!" I mean, this author comes across with this attitude that he has all these dating secrets figured out and he's this enlightened dating master when the fact is that this is very basic stuff that anyone with even minimal social skills has already figured out a long time ago. And if your social skills are so bad that you actually benefit from any of the advice in this book, you can pretty much forget about dating women. Well, forget about dating attractive ones, anyway.

This author writes things that are either already widely-known, worthless, or both, then has the audacity to actually go "There, now you know blah blah whatever it was." What a loser!!

Examples: this guy actually advises you to use the old "Mistaken Identity Ploy", in which you start a conversation with a girl by acting like you recognize her from somewhere. Come on!! Sure, it could work, but that's not the point. The point is I already knew that one!! Everybody does!! If you're selling a book on something, put some original material in it!!

This guy also recommends walking up behind a girl and tapping her on the shoulder. He says it sends a clear message that she's the one you're interested in. Is he serious? I can't think of anything more rude than being tapped on the shoulder, and I've seen idiots in nightclubs do it. EVERY time, the girl turns around, looks at him, realizes she's just been touched by someone she doesn't know, turns back around, and ignores him. You can bet that nothing that guy does for the rest of the night is going to get that girl talking to him.

As a bouncer, I cannot count the times I've been approached by pretty girls and asked to grab some moron by the scruff of the neck and throw him out of the club for doing most of the useless, extremely unadvisable crap in this worthless book. I don't often return books, but this one's going RIGHT back to the store RIGHT NOW.

If you have a close circle of friends who've had success with women. most of the advice will be familiar to you.

The upside of this book is that Barry reminds how important it is to be persistent. Anyone who's been through a dating dry spell knows that it's hard to pick yourself up and keep going at times. We all need inspiration to keep going at times. Barry also does a good job addressing scenario specific information and handling each stage of the dating process. He reminds us that:

getting a phone number doesn't equal success.
It's not a date until you're at her door and she's waiting.
don;t tell to many people about your dates before they happen in case things fall through.
- and other useful tips to avoid embarrassing situations

Fro some reason, he reviews the sexual basepaths (1st base, 2nd base) Why? I have no idea

What I didn't like about this book was that Barry offers some silly ideas for approaching women. For example:

He suggests ideas such as pretending to be "clueless" boy looking for information girl. My experience is that, unless you're really feeling clueless and need information, this is a waste of time.

Barry also suggests talking to girls while waiting in line for the bathroom at bars. What he fails to mention is that these girls are forced to talk to you or they'll lose their place in line. A better idea is to wait for the girl to separate herself from her friends(wait till she goes to the bar for a drink). This way a) you've got her semi-alone b) she isn't trapped, like she'd be at the bathroom.

Barry makes a good point when he says that it's usually a waste of time to chase the hottest girl in the bar and that there are many "cute" girls that are readily available. However, at times it seemed like he was encouraging the shy guy to lower his standards.

I'll give this book 2 stars because there's some good material there but overall, the advice is severely lacking.

Despite the shortcomings accurately mentioned by other reviewers, I enjoyed this book. One thing I should mention is that it is not a good self-esteem builder - something I think us "shy" guys can use. For those of you who want to overcome your shyness with women, I strongly recommend "The Evolution of a Warrior" by Christopher Regan - a great book on how master yourself and the opposite sex!

Mr. Dutter accurately portrays today's dating scene and the dating mind-set of females in this book. This book does not contain any PC, only honest observations of the female sex. Mr. Dutter tells the reader the specific signs to look for that signify a woman likes you and wants to have sex with you, and he also explains to the reader the signs a woman gives off that mean further pursuit of her is a lost cause. I believe many woman may not like this book because it gives away many of their dating and manipulating secrets and puts the male back in the dating driver's seat! My friends and I started following this book's advice religiously, and our sexual and intellectual satisfaction with women have improved 1000 percent! We have taken to calling Mr. Dutter "Saint Barry".

This book is extremely helpful for us shy guys who aren't the life of the party or who simply dont feel comfortable around a lot of people. However, if you have real anxiety or fear issues then you need more help than this book -- but those CAN be overcome.

I'd also recommend The RoMANtic's Guide by Michael Webb -- it is truly a great book on simple and creative tips you can use to get the attention (or keep the attention) of someone you are interested in.

This is a very handy book! I find myself consulting it constantly! It is like a Bible for Shy Guys!

I reccommend it to any guy who wants to meet girls! It is also funny. Dutter uses his skills as a stand-up comedian to cover the dating scene, with all its triumphs and tragedies.

Dealing with the pain of rejection has never been so funny!

More than your typical how-to guide, this book offers laughs with advice. Dutters advice about dating is peppered with pop-culture references. It's like having the Fonz as a helpful older brother.

While the premise is decent enough, the material and suggestions offered by the author are dreadful. Why its a mainstay in the dating section of mega bookstores is a bigger mystery than how the Steelers won the Superbowl.

Hopefully guys realize at this stage in the game that 'pickup lines,' no matter how clever or nuanced, simply don't work. Why? Because while giving you a moment's attention, most are either crude or insulting, forcing a woman to respond in a way drenched in irritation. And compliments come off trite or insincere.

Far better to engage people in social settings with a set routine that conveys all the best qualities about you.

If you're looking for great material to approach women, look elsewhere.

- GiddyupGuy