Customer Reviews

Silent Tears: A Journey Of Hope In A Chinese Orphanage

5 star:		(125)
4 star:		(19)
3 star:		(7)
2 star:		(2)
1 star:		(6)

 

 

As the mother of a child adopted from China, I was very interested in reading this book. When it arrived, I couldn't put it down until I got to the last page and yes, I cried throughout.

Kay Bratt tells an important story about the institutional environment so many of our children were raised in. Understanding the trauma they have been through goes a long way to knowing how to help them recover. While this is the story of one orphanage in one country, I imagine the scenarios could be true in far too many places. A must read for parents adopting from an orphanage.

Kay,
This is Le Men's dad. (Le Men was a heart baby in the orphanage described in this book.)

I wanted to write to you and let you know what an astounding service you have done in the publishing of your book. You have provided a glimpse into a world that many, including myself, are unable to fathom and terrified of realizing really exists. As the father of eight, I love my children more desperately than most people can comprehend. And so, it is difficult for me to comprehend situations of abuse and neglect like you describe. I would not have had the strength and determination that you showed to continue returning. I have great confidence in my skills and ability to succeed in many areas in this world. In the battle you faced, I am ashamed to say I would have failed. My love for children would not have been sufficient to overcome my weaknesses.

You asked in your book how God could let these children suffer. I believe in a loving and compassionate God. But, I also believe that we have free will and that nature will play its role of random change within our lives. The whims of men and culture created the situations you describe, not God. God provides the canvas and the paint. We provide the hand. He gently guides the brush when we ask Him.

As I read your book I started out with anger as I read of the suffering of the children. As I read deeper into your story I began to understand, as you did, that the staff in the orphanage were buffering themselves emotionally in a situation that was largely a no win situation. It brought to mind stories from the Civil War and Vietnam where doctors quickly amputated limbs to save a life because there were not sufficient resources, personnel or supplies to save limbs or lives of all those injured. Better to save something than to lose it all. But, it takes an emotional buffering to operate in such situations as you describe. I do not think I could have faced it.

Until I read your book, I did not understand the linkage my wife and I truly played in adopting our four lovely children from China. People tell us 'what a wonderful thing you have done'. We reply 'we did it out of selfishness, an overwhelming desire to have more children in our lives and our family'. I am sure many think we are being modest, but this is very true for us. We never approached adoption as a means of rescuing a child. We were driven by an incredible need to love children. Frankly, it was a need that neither of us fully understood then or now. We did not know of the desperation of the children other than through fleeting comments or inferences or rumors.

Now, I understand that God was guiding my wife and me in ways we did not recognize. We were definitely responding to your prayers without knowing of you or the influence your prayers were having in our lives. I know in my heart that God spoke to us and guided us even as you spoke to Him. So, have faith that God does listen to prayers and does work in ways we can not fathom.

Thank you for all you did for our lovely Le Men. He is truly an astounding boy and will grow into an amazing man. He is loaded with love and compassion and he continues to teach us and expand us each day. These are things that you made possible through your determination to save a child. We have purchased an additional copy of your book to keep for him until he is old enough to read it and understand your blessings, sacrifices and determination that made his life possible.

Thank you for what you have done and the sacrifices you have made. Your incredible determination resulted in simple acts of love and kindness that can change a world. I am sure the Lord will bless and keep you and yours.

I started this book intending to read it slowly. Well, I could not put it down! It is beautifully written and insightful. I love the honesty of the author as she is down and then back up with her emotions. She gives an excellent picture of what life is like in a Chinese orphanage which is shocking to say the least. The best part; however, is that it is a "journey in hope". I am so encouraged to see what one person can accomplish. We should all be so blessed to find an area in our lives that we can make a difference. I HIGHLY recommend this book!

My wife and I have been blessed with a daughter we adopted from China. I saw this book on Amazon and was looking forward to reading it and gaining some knowledge of a Chinese orphanage.

I received this book for Christmas and started reading it almost immediately upon opening the gift. I made it quickly through the initial chapters but kept waiting for something that never seemed to develop. While the story is moving and the author should be applauded for her efforts to improve the orphange at which she volunteered, it is my opinion her writing style left a great deal to be desired. I guess I was hoping for a better written story with more depth and instead found myself reading a blog of her daily activities.

I would still recommend this book for parents of adopted Chinese chidren or for people with an interest in the story of an orphanage in China. While I'm certain my review will be unpopular, I guess I was simply expecting more and want to let others know my opinion.

I applaud the author for her years of work on behalf of China's orphans. I know that I could not have done what she has done. But, I have to say that this book is a huge disappointment. I have adopted two beautiful children from China and have also worked on behalf of the orphanages. I was looking forward to reading more about where my children may have spent their early years and what experiences may have helped shape them. Instead I got a very one-sided narcissistic look at Ms. Bratt's experiences - HER feelings and the hardships SHE endured. Though she does give a valuable glimpse into a particular orphanage in a particular city, I found that her ego got in the way of any meaningful narrative. The writing is also a bit dull; I felt like I was reading flat blog entries. There is certainly nothing wrong with this, but I personally was expecting more. About 10 pages in it was clear that the author was ego-driven and wanted to let us know that she was a good American sweeping in to save the orphans. There are so many hard-working foreigners who have spent their time and personal resources to help in the orphanages, and few seek public approval for their service or write an expose of their experiences.

Ms. Bratt's view of China and her people is very negative in this book. I wish she could have had more appreciation for the cultural differences in our countries and not chastised so harshly those things that don't fit her viewpoint of "right" simply because it isn't the American way of doing things. Sadly, I have been told by more recent volunteers to this orphanage that Ms. Bratt's book caused some repercussions for some of the nannies mentioned. These nannies need our support, our education, and our compassion for the hard job that they have. They will be even less friendly and less willing to allow foreigners to volunteer and provide desperately needed education and training if they know it may have negative consequences. None of this is good for the children who have to live in these orphanages long after the loving Americans have gone home. I'm sure that what Ms. Bratt details of the orphanage is very true, as I have seen some of this firsthand - and it's not pleasant. But, as a serious writer, Ms. Bratt should have made her narrative less negative toward the nannies, or China in general. Her arrogance is almost insulting. Keep in mind that Ms. Bragg has not adopted a child herself, so she isn't vested in portraying more than one viewpoint like some adoptive parents may be. I'm thankful that she does not have a child from China, as her disdain would certainly color her child's view of his or her heritage.

I was intrigued by Ms. Bratt's motivation for writing what comes across as a self-serving narrative, so I checked out her Facebook page and her website. Ms. Bratt says in some of her posts that her dream was to be a published writer. I congratulate her on her book and the fulfillment of her dream. But after reading her recent posts that hype her book and often brag on it's Amazon ranking, I wonder if her heart is truly in helping the orphans of China or if her heart is more motivated by the desire to fulfill a dream - and her time in the orphanage is simply a way to get there.

Again, I do admire Ms. Bratt for her help in the orphanage and for the hard work she put in. It was a commitment and the lives of some of the children have been made better because of her. I am not judging Ms. Bratt, but the book leaves something to be desired. There are so many other books out there that provide a less one-sided, less narcissistic picture of the stark existence of China's orphans.

Kay Bratt has captured the heart of the orphan child of China through her work there. We have a son and daughter adopted from Chinese orphanages, as older children, and both born with special needs. Silent Tears opened a floodgate of emotions with answers to the many questions I've had over the past years raising our son and daughter and trying to understand their earliest years living in Chinese orphanages. Kay speaks with the honest compassion of a mother's heart for orphaned children worldwide. As a mother to 7 children, 5 through foreign adoption, and an adoption website owner, and moderator of a military adoption support group, I found Kay Bratt's book to be a light of hope and truth for the orphan child.
Barbara Burke
www.adoptionfamily.org

The personal account is not very descriptive nor provides any imagery to the reader. Even the facts are thin and the writing style is dull. There is nothing new that I have gained from reading this book. I wish I had read a page of this book before purchasing it as it would be a pretty good picture of the entire book. Very easy to read but I cannot even put myself through to finish the book. This book is an account of the author's personal views and basic observations of her volunteer work. If you're looking for something more, don't waste your time with this.

I see most reviews coming from adoptive parents, and so far so good...I think Ms. Bratt will probably get some negative feedback from adoptive parents along the way who have more of a `don't want to know' attitude which could anger them when they suddenly are faced with a true look at how their adopted child may or may not have been treated. This author was obviously not worried about that and wrote from the heart. I appreciate the honesty she gave in telling her story. While I am not an adoptive parent, and have no intentions of being so, I enjoyed this book. I am in general just a book-lover...of all kinds. I judge it by how long it took me to read it, if it made me laugh and if it made me cry... this one did all that. As a bonus, I hope the honest look at this one particluar orphanage will cause more people, Chinese or non-Chinese, to strive to make a difference with orphaned children around the world.

I am a mother to a daughter adopted from China, and as such, I read anything I can get my hands on about Chinese orphanages.
Although I admire the author for the work she did, I, personally, did not benefit much from having read her book. The information about her time spent in the orphanage provided a very general overview of what it was like for her, and to some degree what it was like for a few of the children. I didn't find her interpretations of her experiences to be terribly insightful--the most in-depth description in the entire book was when the author described her thoughts during a foot-massage and they had little or nothing to do with the orphanage.
To me, the book seemed very close to a "just the facts" description of one, un-named orphanage, relayed through the author's thinly veiled dislike of Chinese people and culture.

This is pure vanity publishing. The author clearly published this as a means to feed her own ego (as evident by her constant reminders that she is at the orphanage a few hours at a time to provide a little bit of love to the children and how the workers talked about how pretty she is - oh gag!). The vanity publishing is also evident as the book lacks a critical editor's eye to correct the constant misuse of tense and help the author tone down her often insulting cultural ignorance for anything that isn't American. The tone of the book is condescending and reeks of American ethnocentrism. It gives new meaning to the ugly American abroad- especially when she sticks out her tongue at Chinese pedestrians who stare at her in the streets. It is a difficult 440+ page read.
While she states that her overall goal was/is to provide love and compassion to the children in the orphanages, I am fearful that this type of work will do more harm than good in the long run for the children in Chinese orphanages. As an adoptive parent from China, I am grateful she volunteered; however, she clearly lacks the foresight and cultural understanding to know that not all orphanages are run as the one in which she worked and her lack of cultural competence by publishing this work can slow down if not stop further international adoptions out of China.