The fictitious Are We There Yet? guidebook series falsely claims to have covered nonexistent towns from Lake Flaccid to Pwagmattasquarmsettport, but even if these other books and grim places existed, this lowdown on Bart's hometown would make any list of top vacation non-destinations. After a night at the Happy Earwig Hotel, you can trip the light Springtastic to the South Street Squidport, or shove Bart aside and try the Dirt Nap II game at the Noiseland Video Arcade. Catch the latest brainless blockbuster at the Googolplex Theatres, or get highbrow and catch Apu in Bright Lights, Beef Jerky
at the Springfield Film Festival. Crave tunes? Try King Toot's Music Store, or nab a youth-culture CD at Suicide Notes (formerly Good Vibrations). Get a gravel rattle at Lullabuy$, the cut-rate baby emporium. Wolf a Creamycrunch Chugger at Gulp'n'Blow and dodge the swinging blade at the front door of the It's a Wonderful Knife shop. But please don't doff your radiation suit, and do read the signs: "This park is not copless, so please don't go topless." --Tim Appelo
About the Author
Matt Groening, the creator and executive producer of the Emmy® Award-winning series The Simpsons, as well as creator of the cartoon strip "Life in Hell" and the animated FOX television series Futurama, is the man responsible for bringing animation back to primetime and creating an immortal nuclear family. In addition, Groening formed Bongo Comics Group in 1993 and currently serves as publisher of The Simpsons Library of Wisdom, Simpsons Episode Guides, Simpsons Comics, Bart Simpson Comics, Radioactive Man Comics, Simpsons Comics Treasure Trove, the annual Bart Simpson's Treehouse of Horror, Futurama Comics and more than 36 comic compilations, as well as many instant classics including Bart Simpsons Guide to Life, The Simpsons Handbook and The Simpsons Uncensored Family Album.