Customer Reviews

Single Parenting in the 21st Century and Beyond: A Single Mother's Guide To Rearing Sons Without Fathers

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If you're a good, relatively healthy single mom who is looking for new insights and understanding for raising a son, this is NOT the book for you. I might say this book is for moms who are in survival mode and barely coping, but even that would be a stretch. With advice like "Don't compare him unfavorably with neighbors or relatives" and "Pay attention to what he is doing and let him know you are proud of the good things he does".....um....yeah...I'd say it's more for moms lacking even the most basic parenting skills. The tone of the book is patronizing and annoying, ending with "I hope this book has convinced you that you can be a single parent and raise a son successfully. I know you can." Really? Because if you actually thought this book was useful, I'd have my doubts. I typically share my books with friends or family or donate them. This one, I'm throwing in the garbage so I don't expose anyone to the drivel within.

I have to confess that Dr. Passley is my therapist. As a divorced, single mother I had lots of problems when I first came to him. Because I was so out of control of my life I also suffered from depression and anxiety. Dr. Passley's advice on how to take control of my home was instrumental in helping me to get out of my depression and feel empowered and able to function. Instead of just telling me that I need to discipline my children (which is what everyone else would say) he gave me the specific steps to take and even warned me on how my child would rebel at every stage. He encouraged me to stick with it. At the time, I had a very angry, lazy 17 yr old and a 5 yr old who was not only out of control but would never sleep through the night. I was so tired and defeated that I had literally given up. After one year of working with Dr. Passley, my life has been transformed. My eldest son is now 18 and just graduated from the Air Force Basic Training. This is the kid that I never thought could even keep a job at Pizza Hut. My youngest is now 6, sleeps all night, is doing great in Kindergarten. Although he is still a very active kid, he has learned how to obey. People who know us comment on how much more calm he is. Before seeing Dr. Passley, my life centered around going to work and taking care of my children. Now, I have friends and a social life and take time for myself. And my kids are doing much better for it! Dr. Passley really knows what he is talking about and has plenty of clinical experience to back up his ideas. If you are a single mother and are overwhelmed by the seemingly inexplicable behavior of your sons, then please, get this book.

I have been a student of Dr. Passley's, and I am also a colleague as I currently work in the mental health field. Dr. Passley's knowledge and insight has been translated into an exceptional tool by way of this book, able to be utilized across circumstances; whether a student, parent, client or practioner this book is an invaluable resource. I think the piece that I found to be most valuable was the very practical "how-to" steps. I am a firm believer that knowledge in-and-of-itself does not have the capacity to change us, but the practical application of knowledge has profound effects. Knowledge without application is just information, knowleged applied is wisdom. This is what I call the YBH (yes, but how). Dr. Passley does an excellent job comunicating the "How" in his book. I have already recommended his book to several clients and I will continue to utilize this book as part of my professional resource tools.

Dr. Passley writes in a very down to earth and practical manner. His book was insightful and yet easy to read and understand. I have attended classes where Dr. Passley was my professor and have been blessed by his knowledge and found that his book was just as much of a delight. His practical tips make reading the book worth while and it is a quick easy read for those who do not have much time. While the book talks about rearing a son as a single mother, many of the principles found in the book would also be helpful to raising girls, though not all of them would be applied in the same manner. It was a great book. If you are a single mom or work with children being raised by single mom's I highly recommend reading the book. It will help you gain insight into some of the do's and don'ts as well as providing encouragement as you seek to do the best for your children. If you are currently in a relationship with a man, be it the father, or someone else, but are not married the book would still be very beneficial for you to read (even if you are living with the guy).

this book is full of biased information from limited resources. additionally, the information presented is condescending and not well organized. if you need this much help, you're probably not a very good parent to anyone by any standard. otherwise, you're just paying for common sense in book form.

I'm reading it right now and I can't tell you how helpful it is. Some things may apply to you and others won't, like sleeping with your son, something very normal and acceptable in my culture, but strongly unrecommended in the book.

I do recommend the book for single mothers, specially the part about not trashing your ex with your son, something that we, latina women, often do. And above all, do let your ex see your son whenever he feels like it, sadly, even if that means once a year, your son will definitely benefit from that "Santa Claus" visit.

I love how the book enlightens parents about the need, purpose and benefits of and commitment to discipline and how it establishes great boundaries with your child. I think one of the most important chapters talks about the parenting practices and knowing and understanding your parenting style and how it impacts your involvement with your child. Learning more about yourself will indeed help you understand how to best interact with your child. Dr. Passley provides you with great insight to these areas and more but doesn't finish without providing encouragement to all single moms. It's good to know you never have to be alone.