If Singleness Is a Gift, What's the Return Policy? [Paperback]

Holly Virden (Author), Michelle McKinney Hammond (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: July 3, 2003

When it comes to singleness, Holly Virden and Michelle McKinney Hammond have been there, done that. These two amazing women don't regard the single life as a cross to bear, but rather an amazing opportunity to take advantage of all life has to offer and to discover their God-ordained purpose. While acknowledging the pitfalls singles sometimes face, they celebrate the advantages that also come with singleness and validate it as a true gift from God. Tackling topics such as lust, loneliness, discouragement, and bitterness, the authors use humor and sound biblical teaching as a point of reference. Unique features include a "Dating 101" section, a Q&A format on hot topics, and an open, honest dialogue between the two authors.

Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Holly Virden, who founded Segue Media, a Christian-driven public relations and promotional company in Nashville, has worked and traveled with many high-profile Christian artists including Kim Hill, Sierra, and Bob Carlisle, as well as record labels such as Star Song, Forefront, Pamplin, and Sparrow. She has worked behind the scenes for such conferences as Women of Faith, Women of Virtue, Focus on the Family, and Moody’s Conferences for Women.

Michelle McKinney Hammond is the author of eighteen books, including What to Do Until Love Finds You. She is also a cohost of the regionally broadcast, Emmy-nominated television show Aspiring Women. As founder of HeartWing Ministries, Michelle has been a sought-after speaker for women’s conferences, retreats, and seminars including Women of Virtue, Focus on the Family, and Moody’s Conferences for Women. She has been featured on the cover of numerous publications and on television programs including Politically Incorrect, BET’s OH Drama, and NBC’s The Other Half.

Product Details

• Paperback: 224 pages
• Publisher: Thomas Nelson (July 3, 2003)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0785263292
• ISBN-13: 978-0785263296
• Product Dimensions: 8.5 x 6.5 x 0.6 inches
• Shipping Weight: 8.3 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 2.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (2 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #920,708 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

11 of 12 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Worthwhile Read, June 13, 2005

By 

M2M "M2M" (Pickerington, Ohio) - See all my reviews

This review is from: If Singleness Is a Gift, What's the Return Policy? (Paperback)

Generally, I am not a person that likes self-help books; I find them to be boring, long winded, and not worth the effort. But, this book is different. It's interesting, funny, and easy to understand.

Because I'm single and almost thirty I'm constantly reminded by family/friends of my single status. I developed a of stress and self-doubt. This book helped me focus on the important things in a Christians life and to know that my single status is not a curse, but a blessing.I found out that the thing I thirst for is not marriage, but a better relationship wiith God.

In no way is this book a "stay single forever" book, but a enjoy where you are now book. Both authors are single and satisfied, but also open and anticipating a human husband.

If you're single, stressed, and confused this is a good book to read. It will help you see the importance of your single life and look forward to the blessings to come.

8 of 15 people found the following review helpful:

1.0 out of 5 stars Singleness is NOT a gift...no exchange policy necessary, May 23, 2008

By 

NoGiftofSingleness "NoGiftofSingleness" (Burnaby, BC) - See all my reviews

This review is from: If Singleness Is a Gift, What's the Return Policy? (Paperback)

If the cheesy "sassy-sis-whackin'-you-upside-the-head" tone of this book doesn't make you sick, the outmoded "gift of singleness" theme probably will.

Assisted handily by McKinney-Hammond, Virden self-flagellates about her struggle with being grateful for her singleness, a "gift" she admits she'd rather exchange for marriage. A few years after this book is published, it turns out to be in vain -- singleness isn't a gift after all. At least, not biblically speaking. The New Living Translation they quote from has since taken the "gift of singleness" out of their version of 1 Cor 7:7! What's more, it was never meant to be a reference to ALL singleness, wanted or not -- only to those who are, as Christ said in Matthew 19, "so given to be able to receive this teaching" to "make themselves eunuchs", or rather, CHOOSE to remain single, for the sake of doing kingdom work. In other words, we can stop bashing each over the head with the notion that all singleness is a gift and leave it those who want to forfeit marriage for the sake of the kingdom to receive Christ's endorsement of the single life.

Christians of the past never considered circumstantial singleness to be a "gift", least of all prolonged singleness. It's a modern term coined by modern bible editors that has unfortunately led to a whole genre of books for singles that, like this one, join with the reader in commiserating about how their involuntary singleness makes them suffer -- and then admonish them for their lack of contentment! It's one thing to learn to be content in your circumstances as exemplified by Paul, and quite another to call that which causes suffering a gift, which the Bible never does. In over-stating the contentment message to singles, we end up superficially skirting any discussion of the reasons for the widespread singleness we see in churches today -- something that's been going on for years.

Fortunately, there are newer books that take seriously the issues that confront Christian singles today, providing genuine direction for individuals and church communities alike, in order to restore the ordinariness and accessibility of marriage:

Getting Serious about Getting Married: Rethinking the Gift of Singleness, by Debbie Maken

Get Married: What Women Can Do to Help it Happen, by Candice Watters.

These are the ones that are truly on the side of singles who desire a godly marriage -- do not be fooled by wolves dresses in sheep's clothing! The tide is turning, and teachings are under reform. At last, we no longer have to accept lumps on the head from those who brandish the club of contentment. Genuine support is out there!