Customer Reviews

Slaughtered Vomit Dolls

5 star:		(3)
4 star:		(1)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(4)

 

 

A friend brought this over to the house a few months ago. I'm a big fan of deranged, extreme horror, underground stuff, etc. Yet I found this film to be a bore. No offense.

Dunno...call me old school, but I still prefer the Richard Kern stuff from the late 80s.

Plain and simple: this is the worst movie I have ever seen in my life by a very wide margin. It's really not even a movie, but rather a montage of rape, decapitation and vomiting set to the tune of industrial music, random evil sounding noises and distorted voices. There is barely any dialogue at all, and the few words that are actually spoken are almost all in a distorted voice. There is absolutely NO plot. I watched it 3 days ago and I'm STILL mad that I wasted over an hour of my time on it.

A lot of horror movies have surreal, morbid scenes in them with montages of traumatic events. These typically last for a couple of minutes and then the movie will go back to the plot. In the case of Slaughtered Vomit Dolls, these scenes ARE the plot. It gets old after about 5 minutes. I spent the rest of the movie with my face firmly planted in my palm wondering to myself what kind of a human being would find something like this actually entertaining. The sound effects are beyond cheesy and the camera work is bad. In a lot of cases horror movies this bad are so bad that they are funny. Well, this movie goes that extra mile and is not so bad that it is funny, it's so bad that it's simply unwatchable. If you are curious about this movie, do yourself a favor and try to find a preview of it somewhere. Know that what you will see in a trailer is what happens for 72 minutes.

The only way a person would like this movie is if they were genuinely into torture and mutilation. So unless you're a serial killer, a rapist, or a person who truly enjoys human suffering, stay as far away from this abominable pile of crap as humanly possible! It's an "experimental" film gone horribly wrong. The only thing the director has accomplished is the making of a horror movie that has possibly more gore than anything preceding it, yet is still more boring and uninteresting than watching paint dry or grass grow. I was not shocked by this movie. I was not grossed out or compelled in any way whatsoever. I was only baffled......baffled at the thought that someone actually thought this movie could qualify as entertainment.

This is a very hard film to try and write a review on, there is really no story line to follow but the relentless gore, brutality and bodily fluids makes up for it. This could be mistaken for a perverse snuff film if not prepared and educated prior to viewing. The director, Lucifer Valentine, has ascended into a new level of horror that most will not be able to stomach or for that matter tolerate. The SFX are realistic, the depravity is realistic and the intense levels of disgust to dark, dark depression will clench to your throat with both hands. The subject matter will NOT leave anything to the imagination, very graphic and disturbing content! The actresses' played their prostitute junkie roles a little too well, you be the judge for that and be sure to watch the history of the movie in the extras on this DVD, as if the film wasn't enough. Over all this film is cut and pasted together and runs a little over an hour, the most extreme hour of bile inducing sickness ever put onto screen. Honestly, I don't know how he got away with it but I am damn sure glad he did! Gore-Hounds rejoice for the next genre of horror, VOMIT GORE and to all others, steer far, far away as this will numb your fragile little minds!!!

I should say upfront that I did an interview with this filmmaker for this movie. A thoroughly bizarre, strange, and nice guy.

Nice?!?!?!

Sure. And here's why.

In modern horror cinema (stay with me, I'll explain this in a moment) there is an awful lot of posturing, posing, and pretense. I mean, Rob Zombie from instance..... come on.

Not so with the guy who made this. He didn't set out to shock you as much as he just..... made a movie. The most shocking parts of this movie aren't faked, they're part of this guys every day life (well, maybe not every day, but they're things he does in his personal time away from the camera). And when young modern filmmakers tirelessly posture at being edgy, shocking, pushing boundaries and going to the edge..... well, this guy just redefines the whole concept. Edgy? This film is a razor blade. Shocking? This film will test the gag reflex of most viewers. Pushing boundaries? This guy - and importantly, the people in the film - don't HAVE any boundaries, they're not gone, they simply never existed.

So, Mr. Valentine is somewhat unique. You probably have never seen a film like this, either from a narrative standpoint, nor a cinematic one. But even then the Director isn't posturing, he just is. Viewers will likely be left confused as to what the Director was trying to do. The Director is confused that you're confused. It's life, nothing more or less. It's putrid, disgusting, vile, and shameless. But it's also none of these.

With mountains of "Torture Porn" releases positioning for the mantle of being "the most shocking film" of the moment..... well, forget it. THIS is the film that does that. Forget the rest. And it isn't even trying.

I lost track of LV, but if he ever reads this..... kudos. I never forgot this film. I was was surprised to see it on Amazon, but then, why shouldn't it be?

Enjoy.

<strong>Slaughtered Vomit Dolls</strong> (Lucifer Valentine, 2005)

I gave the second film in what is now Lucifer Valentine's Vomit Gore trilogy, <em>ReGOREgitated Sacrifice</em>, a thoroughly awful review a while back (24 June 2010, to be exact). So what on earth possessed me to watch the first film in the trilogy, knowing I would hate it just as much? I couldn't tell you the answer to that. But watch it I did, and I got pretty much what I expected.

If you think about the definition of pornography, not necessarily the strict one used to judge obscenity cases but the more relaxed cultural one--what you have here is a simple fetish porn film. It contains no hardcore sex, but the rest of the ingredients are there. There is the sexual fetish (Valentine freely admits in interviews that he's an emetophile, or vomit fetishist), there is copious nudity, there is a complete absence of plot. There is also some low-budget gore, but I do have to give Valentine a bit of grudging respect in that some of it (the removal of the eyes form the flensed face early in the film particularly stands out) looks pretty durned good given the probable budget here. The soundtrack is also just as solid as that in <em>ReGOREgitated Sacrifice</em> (while reading an interview, I did find the answer to the question I posed in that review; the soundtracks are composed and performed by Valentine himself, which makes me wonder if he's ever considered a career in noise), and is once again the best thing about the film. Ameara LaVey, once again playing main character Angela Aberdeen, is quite easy on the eyes and spends most of the flick in various states of undress. Is that enough to sustain an almost eighty-minute film, especially one in which people make themselves puke as much as possible? (Though it must be said, if I'm remembering correctly, the second film has a lot more of that then this one does.) I'll let you be the judge of that. For me? No. Which once again brings up the question of why I watched it. And I still don't have an answer. (half)

This movie is a MUST see for everybody who wants to experience what real PERVERSION means. A "11"-STAR-RATING on the SICK-O-RAMA scale of mental transgressions. Only PHILOSOPHY OF A KNIFE is equal in the PERVERSION rating. A good DVD for everybody who needs a reason to get the visitors out of the home. MOM will love it ...

Slaughtered Vomit Dolls...what a perfectly pointless and awesomely sick title. Director Lucifer Valentine had a girlfriend that would let him film her doing absolutely anything. So, might as well grab a camera and make a vile, deranged, visually shocking, horrendous gross-out film.

This thing is warped and demonic. It's a stretch to even classify this as a movie. It pilfers brutality for the sake of mental exasperation, randomly inserting hints of a plot structure that add up to nothing but a desperate nightmare. Seriously, no story here to try to comprehend. Just a woman with major issues.

It does have the unholy trinity of wretched cinema--nudity, blood, and puke. Plenty of it. Some good special effects that seem all too real. The narrative itself is poorly developed, but it is gloomy and atmospheric. Rarely does a movie make me feel uncomfortable, so severed thumbs up for that.

But really the most alarming and captivating thing about this dvd is the special features. Sheesh! It has a bit of an interview with the star, Ameara Lavey. The most jacked up conversation ever caught on film. She speaks of bruises acquired while pole-dancing, masturbation, and other insecurities. Truly disturbing.

Recommended only to the most soulless of gorehounds.

I tried to watch this with an open mind I really did. It just wasn't good - it seemed designed just to be repulsive and shocking ripping off Hostel and Saw -with more extreme footage. I think it was an excuse to film skinny naked girls and watch them in degrading situations. It didn't feel like art - it wasn't really interesting and it lacked any redeeming value whatsoever.

I'm not saying this couldn't have been a half-way decent film - but it would require someone with more of an imagination and the ability to develop a plot. But that's just my opinion I understand some people really enjoyed it. I have watched other extreme type films and I was surprised at how well it was done no matter how disgusting the subject matter - 'Srapbook' comes to mind. So I thought I'd give this a looksee -but I was disappointed.

LOOK IM GONNA BE HONEST..... if you like some respectful women(ahem ahem)which there is no way these girls(or W*&%^S are respectful)stripping , well then you got yourself a gold mine.If you like throwin up (4 real)on sum fake body parts.WELL THEN I SAY GO FOR IT.In the long run ,PUKE AND STRIPPERS SHOWIN THERE questionable goods is really only worth about 1 Dollar....SRY SATAN. THATS JUST THE WAY IT GOES. I love me sum over the top video but this is like a 72 min. of 2 girls and a cup , only with vomit,and a lil satan worship.I will Say that A Lavey is present(Surprising shes A Crackead stripper????) That is if its really her? In the long run,I jus dont care.