Customer Reviews

I Slept with Joey Ramone: A Family Memoir

5 star:		(31)
4 star:		(21)
3 star:		(9)
2 star:		(8)
1 star:		(3)

 

 

I will preface this review by saying I am not what you would call a huge Ramones fan. I know their music well and appreciate their tremendous influence on subsequent acts but I am by no means a fanatic. As such, this is the first full-length book I have read on the band or a member of the band, though I know there is much out there. One of the main reasons I decided to read this book was to hear firsthand of their role in the birth of punk in the '70s. I had read Legs McNeil's book on the history of punk and seen many documentaries that highlight the Ramones importance in this respect. I, however, came to know the Ramones long after the release of _Rock 'n' Roll High School_ and mediocre record after mediocre record. I wanted to experience and learn about the impact the early Ramones had on the music scene and the lasting influence of that impact. Mickey Leigh (and co-author Legs McNeil) do not disappoint in this respect. They do an excellent job of capturing the excitement of how Joey Ramone and his band built on the sound of the New York Dolls and Iggy and the Stooges to become the first true punk band. However, many before them have done this well.

One reason why I enjoy reading biographies of musicians is to get insight into the musician in their formative years, to find out what it is that inspired them. That is the second reason I decided to read this book. I figured Joey Ramone's brother could provide unique insight into what made Joey Ramone and the Ramones who they were. Again, here he did not disappoint. In fact, I would argue that the strongest part of this book are the scenes of Joey and Mickey (their names were actually Jeffrey and Mitchell Hyman then) growing up in the Forest Hills area of Queens. I was fascinated to learn what music and what song first got the Hyman brothers excited about music. Mickey provides a real insight into their home life, the dynamics of the family, their mutual growing obsession with music, and the multitude of health (both physical and psychological) issues that Joey struggled with before (and during) his life as a rock star. Up until this point, this is an exceptionally entertaining read.

However, once the reader gets to the point that Joey and The Ramones start to encounter success, things seem to change. Mickey is constantly making snide comments about the musical ability of the band and how lacking it is. He is quick to remind the reader--in not so subtle ways--that he is a more talented musician than the members of the band. In one instance, he discusses a contribution he made to a song but that was dropped because the guitar riff was too hard. There is simply far too much of this type of resentment scattered throughout the second half of the book. Micky may have good reason for this resentment. He did contribute to the writing process of several songs and help the Ramones in many ways and never really receive credit. However, the book began to make this reader feel uncomfortable. It began to feel like Micky was using the book to pay back anyone who had ever wronged him--no matter how slightly. This extends beyond just the Ramones and their inner family. But it is his depiction of the members of the Ramones that is so unsettling. If for no other reason, than the three core members are no longer alive to defend themselves. This reader kept wondering why he waited until they were gone to write this book. It feels very much like Mickey feels like he deserved the success Joey had. And, somehow, this book--at times--feels like another attempt to achieve that fame.

Having said that, there are many other points in the book where Mickey comes across as someone who genuinely loves his brother. The scenes toward the end of Joey's life are particularly touching. Plus, there is value in the story of how both brother's relationship is repeatedly strained and mended as one achieves the fame and success that both crave. So, with the caveats mentioned above, I will say that, although parts of it might lead to frustration, this is an entertaining and informative book that will appeal to most music fans--and especially to fans of the Ramones. Despite the flaws, the strength of this book is that Leigh and McNeil provide a first-hand (which is of course not objective) account of how a misfit overcame (and continued to overcome) challenge after challenge to become a legend and icon to millions of music fans--including some of the most influential and successful people in music today.

I was in the music scene at the time much of this book takes place, but far removed from the New York scene. As a result I've met many of the people in Mitch's book, but wouldn't push the envelope by calling them close personal friends. It was a time when all of us spent a lot of time frying our brains and convincing ourselves that what we were doing really mattered.

Mitch captures that atmosphere well in the first half of the book but seems to lose touch with the realities of it as his story progresses. I was both eager and a bit fearful as I approached this book because I didn't know Mickey's motives. I watched Richard Carpenter, for example, spend years trying to make a buck off of his sister Karen's death - even going so far as to change up lyrics and sing songs like, "She'd only just begun.... to live." I hoped that Mickey hadn't started down that sickening path.

The good news is that for the most part, he never gives the reader a sense that this is an attempt to bankroll his brother's notoriety. The bad news is that he does waste a lot of time trying to rewrite history in order to paint himself in a better light - at the expense of Joey's (Jeff's) reputation.

I saw the Ramones a number of times and in fact was backstage (if you could call the open area a "backstage" at all) at the show he mentions at Frolics up in Salisbury, Mass. The tension between Johnny and Joey was obvious and their respective entourages quickly seperated into camps on opposite sides of the room. The problem with this book is that while it is very detailed and honest about some aspects of the band, there are huge gaps and outright falsehoods as well.

The first half of the book does a great job in describing how the core band came together. But like many others, Mickey buys into the legend. Anyone even on the fringes of the business at that time knows the legend of the Ramones. They know the story of how other bands zoomed past the Ramones and became millionaires while the Ramones languished in near-poverty. The tale ends with the embittered band calling it quits frustrated and enraged that they never made the big bucks or booked the stadium tours they always dreamed of. Sadly, this isn't the entire truth. Yes, other bands were more successful. But the Ramones didn't exactly starve. Crowds in England, Germany, and several other countries were ten times the size of the usual turnout for their American shows. The band made enough money that Joey owned several residences. They never recorded a platinum album, but they had a large enough core audience that they could bank on sales in the hundred-thousand copy range for all but their last few albums. If you know what you can dependably expect in revenue, it makes it a lot easier to budget how much you spend in production to ensure a profit. Additionally, they were heroes in many countries and their records were hot sellers in smaller but passionate markets around the world. When the band "broke" in South America much of their music was sold on the black market because the label couldn't distribute enough legal copies quickly enough to keep up with the demand. Sire regularly screwed its artists over on royalties, but that's as common throughout the music business as the use of the "C" chord.

The actual truth is that it was an exponential thing. As their bitterness at not becoming household names grew, the quality of their music and their self-abusive behaviors were affected accordingly. They were always an odd construction and became trapped in their own formula, eventually becoming a parody of themselves.

Mickey's book provides some sort of explanation as to the processes that caused it to happen the way it did - but only to a point. The Ramones began to approach the cusp of true success and somehow it all fell apart. It is at this exact moment in the Ramones legacy that Mickey decides to take a sharp turn away from the story of his brother's band and begins to focus on his own personal woes. He devotes the remainder of the book to relating his own relationship with his mother, his falling out with Joey over royalties and record credits, his own drug arrest and so on. While he makes a half-hearted attempt to explain his feud with Joey by blaming it on Johnny Ramone, it's clear that Mickey's real issues are with his brother.

I would much rather that Mickey had devoted more pages to what happened in the last half of the Ramones career as a band. He implies that the Ramones never dented the singles chart, but they did have a moderate hit with "(do you remember)Rock & Roll Radio." It actually got a little airplay and was included in compilation albums and "best of the 70s" collections. Mickey barely brushes up against this song, mentioning that he and his brother would listen to their transistor radios in bed at night as kids. (The chorus of the song says, "do you remember lying in bed with the covers pulled up over your head, radio playing so no one can see?") The song itself is very autobiographical and alludes to many of the childhood events that Mickey mentions in the early part of the book. It was also a turning point in the fortunes of the band. After that song it seemed nothing went right. The Rock & Roll High School movie bombed and their subsequent albums seemed like afterthoughts. I've always wondered what event or events brought about the change. Was it bad management? The exit of one of the core members? Joey's OCD? Unless someone else close to the story decides to write a book (and there are very few left alive to do so) we'll never know the full truth. In fact, Mickey completely ignores some of the excellent music the band created in the later years and doesn't even mention albums like "Acid Eaters", "Adios Amigos," or "Too Tough To Die" which contained another near-hit for the band with "Howling at the Moon (Sha-la-la-la). He also skips the recruiting of the band by Steven King for the Pet Semetary soundtrack. I had hoped the presence of Legs McNeil as co-author would have kept things on track, but alas such is not the case.

Mickey also claims that Joey suffered from Spina Bifida as a result of one of his surgeries. This is almost assuredly incorrect. Spina Bifida is a birth defect and is not a surgical side effect. It sounds more like Jeff (Joey) suffered from birth defects caused by an undeveloped conjoined twin. He may have had Spina Bifida Occulta - a minor form of the birth defect that does have some neurological impact but isn't as serious. John Cougar in fact, was born with Occulta. Joey did have the odd gait and posture of someone with the condition. I don't believe this was Mickey lying about Joey's health issues so much as I think it represents laziness on his part. He had access to the medical records and if he had taken the time he could have done a better job with the health diagnoses he presents - especially considering how they affected the lives of those involved.

I also would have loved to have heard how it was that Green Day wound up inducting the Ramones into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame since they only receive a somewhat unflattering mention toward the end of the book.

"I Slept With Joey Ramone" is a decent read. But it would be a mistake to accept it as THE definitive Ramones biography. Far too many of Mickey's personal issues seep into the book - particularly in the last third - and it leaves many questions unanswered. I gave it a 3 star rating because Mickey deserves a heartfelt thank you from every Ramones fan for relating at least part of Joey's life story. More important than that however, he tells us with great affection of Jeff Hyman's last few moments on earth and how he expired doing what he loved most - listening to good music that eased his heart and soul. Every single person that has loved Ramones music wishes they could have been there to say goodbye to Joey Ramone and, thanks to Mickey, now we can feel and share what that must have been like. If I ever get to meet Mickey again I'll want to shake his hand and thank him for the gift of that shared intimacy. For me - one of the countless casualties of the vain struggle to keep rock & roll alive - it made the book worth more than twice the cost.

Even if you've never heard of, or listened to the Ramones Music, anyone who loves a real-life come from behind story will love, "I Slept with Joey Ramone."

As this book was written by Joey Ramones younger brother, Mickey Leigh, it makes the story even more amazing, because it's NOT fiction. First time author Leigh's very original style makes for a most pleasurable read. However, in this situation I also welcomed the additional insight from rock journalist Legs McNeil - as well as the input from other central characters, including Joey Ramone's mother - which eradicated any suspicion of this being a one sided version of the rock icon's life story.

"I Slept with Joey Ramone" is about being an underdog, about hope, about brotherly and motherly love, about how powerful yet fragile the human spirit is. It's also a behind the curtain look at how tremendously successful and influential one can become in the world of rock & roll, even if you don't start out with a lot of musical talent, have records in the top 40, or get much radio play. And how you can be successful as a human being in general. "I Slept with Joey Ramone" is about not giving up...ever.

Every year there are some really great come from behind, coming of age stories - like the recently released movies "Blind Side" and "Precious" - that demand your attention because they're so damn inspirational. "I Slept With Joey Ramone" is clearly one of those stories, that's well worth the read.

It seems to me that even though Mickey Leigh is Joey Ramones younger brother, more importantly, Mickey is Joey's biggest fan. Besides U2's Bono, of course. The brother's relationship became somewhat tumultuous later in their lives, but at the end of the day, and the end of story, the love displayed between the two is truly touching. Talk about making a grown man cry!

Hey, I won't say that everyone will ball that reads this powerful true story, but I did, and my 20 year old son did -- who is all of a sudden very interested in the history of punk rock. This is just a beautiful book that works on every level.

"I just read "I Slept With Joey Ramone". What a great book! The writing and the portrayal of Joey's life were both excellent. I grew up in New York in the same era, although I was not a Ramones fan. I have a brother with a complicated relationship too and I can relate to many of the emotions presented by Mickey. This book was from the heart and bittersweet on so many levels. I really enjoyed the parts about Joey and Mickey growing up in Queens and how Mickey, the younger brother had to deal with so many aspects of Joey's bizarre path to stardom, including his OCD, his unique nature and persona, and ultimately his incredible talent. The relationships within the Ramones were fascinating (how and why did these guys stay together for so long?). Their rise to success in the early days (1970s) was really interesting, especially given what was happening musically and politically at the time. The descent and disappointments of the band and its members is really well written and of course Joey's death as told by Mickey was heart wrenching to read. There are always dozens of people who try to attach themselves to stars and claim some sort of self-importance from it. In the long run and certainly in the end, it's family that matters. Joey and Mickey both came to know this very clearly. Really good book. I guess I am now officially a Ramones fan...."





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"I Slept With Joey Ramone" was written by Mickey Leigh, who is Joey Ramone's (real name: Jeffrey Hyman) brother. It's a uniquely `inside' book, in that you're getting the sibling's perspective on the Ramones' frontman, who died in 2001. The book was written with Legs McNeil, who is a well-known NY rock writer/scenester/participant (he's written many books, founded the 70's "Punk" magazine, and authored a ton of magazine articles and reviews for around the last 35 years or so in many mainstream pubs). I am not a hard-core Ramones fan, though I have many of their albums and they are without question a unique and influential band in the pantheon of rock. The book, if nothing else, shows just how completely dysfunctional they were, to the point where it's probably a wonder we got any music at all out of them in the first place, and that they lasted so long and/or were able to tolerate each other. The book explores the band's career, as well as the idiosyncrasies of the many members that were in the band over the years (the core band of Joey, Johnny, and Dee Dee, as well as the ever-revolving drummers - Tommy, Richie, etc. plus Dee Dee's successors). Joey's OCD, Johnny's right-wing/extremely hostile personality, Dee Dee's heavy-drug habits, and various other escapades/indulgences of the band and their camp are all covered herein. I particularly found the insight into the long-running conflict between Joey and Johnny of value, as many previous articles I'd read on them hinted that the source of the conflict involved Johnny's wife Linda (who was Joey's girlfriend), and this book sheds a lot of light on the circumstances of that touchy subject. I found Joey to be a somewhat sympathetic character (given that his brother is telling the story, though there's plenty of friction between them due to Mickey's position that Joey constantly ripped him off financially and credits-wise), but Johnny comes off pretty bad here throughout, though that's consistent with other `not a nice guy' stuff I've read about him. I found the first 100 pages or so of the book to be a slow read (there's not much going on except for a long arc of the pre-Ramones years, about the Hyman family's unstable lifestyle of broken marriage, moving around, and Joey and Mickey's hard time fitting in during their awkward-youth years. The story pace picks up once the band actually forms, but at nearly 400 pages, this book could've used a bit of streamlining (I wasn't as interested in hearing Mickey's stories of his own less-successful career), and history is being written by the survivor, so I'd be curious to hear others' side of the story (including hearing more from their contemporaries in that NYC scene) -- hence I've given the book 3 stars. The last 100 or so pages of the book seem to lose momentum, as Mickey focuses quite a bit on his own career problems and a drug bust he's caught up in - this last quarter of the book was an effort to get thru, though the last 20 pages get a bit interesting, if tough to read, about Joey's final days. If you're heavy into the Ramones, though, you will probably like this book, for the unique perspective (though, it probably won't tell you much you didn't already know).

Maybe part of the point here is that the bands that make some great music need some conflict to fuel their art? Most bands that make lasting, classic music had at least some tension, if not outright conflict, within the band, and the Ramones were certainly no exception. I saw the Ramones once (opening for Pearl Jam) near the end of the line in 1995, and they still put out a ton of energy - something like 19 songs in only 43 minutes, at only two speeds: fast, and faster. That three of the four original members are now gone seems weirdly predictable, as it's hard to imagine a band like this would ever be around into old age. This book helped fill in the Ramones backstory for me - though I'd also recommend viewing the documentary , "End of the Century", for additional insight. End of the Century - The Story of the Ramones

Not the kind of biography I was expecting. It was not so much about Joey Ramone after a few chapters. It resembled an attempt to promote one's self and feel important, more than to fully delve into Joey. I gave the book to my husband to read since music is literally his life. He was not too thrilled with this book either. He liked the autobiography I bought him at the dollar store better.

Well-paced and chock full of interesting scenes throughout the life of two brothers, I Slept with Joey Ramone will please Ramones fans as well as anyone interested in family dynamics and mental illness.

Mickey Leigh was born Mitchel Hyman, brother to Jeff Hyman, aka Joey Ramone. Without being laborious, Leigh gives a good overview of the brothers' childhood, from their relationships with their domineering father, to their upbringing living in different parts of New York, to their own fraternal dynamic. We learn of their first musical influences, their school and social experiences and Joey's increasing mental illnesses, undiagnosed and misunderstood for too long; paranoid schizophrenia and OCD. As you can imagine, the stress of this had its negative effects on the family dynamic.

Success changes people and dynamic as well, and Mitchel is very honest about the personality changes he witnessed in his parents, in reaction to Joey's success with the Ramones. Once unpleasant and abusive, their father eventually came to be a hanger-on, even attempting to record his own songs. Their mother, once impartial and loath to be mistreated, eventually came to enjoy The Lifestyle, and came to favor and cater to Joey. Leigh doesn't seem to judge this as much as he is just matter of fact about it.

The book also reveals plenty of Ramones dirt wthout being gleeful or tabloid about it; every band has its own dynamic and the members sometimes get along, sometimes don't, and things change as time goes on. If you've read Motley Crue's The Dirt, you will recognize the backstabbing, the two-against-two, the paranoia about sleeping with each others' girlfriends...

I don't know how much better this memoir could be. Much is included here, and it's a pretty satisfying read. No one should end up feel gypped or like this is just some rock star's whiny sibling trying to cash in. There is a lot of heart present, and one can sense the love of the author for his brother, as well as his parents. Stuff happens in families, good and bad, and we can all relate on some level, whether we've been touched by fame or not.

The Ramones stand as one of the most influential rock bands of all time. They came around at an era when rock music had stagnated into boring solos and a lot of folks riding horses with no names.The Ramones built on the framework provided by the Stooges and the MC5, distilling the basic 3-chord song structure down to it's most primal level. Their songs were often less than 2 minutes long, all speed and fury. No solos, no posturing, just the amplified essence of what made rock music so liberating and fun in the first place.

Any book covering any aspect of the Ramones is due for some scrutiny for the simple fact that a lot of people see this band as something sacred. The Ramones helped to define a generation. They rose above the music to help give voice to an entire lifestyle and attitude, and that's a lot of weight and history to carry around.

Enter Mickey Leigh's new book, 'I Slept With Joey Ramone.' Mickey is Joey's younger brother and a player on the punk and New York music scene in his own right. That fact puts him in a position to give us insights into Joey and the band that no one else could, and I think that to a large degree he succeeds here. His writing is a bit sloppy sometimes, trying to be equal parts autobiography, family memoir, biography of Joey, and chronichle of an evolving music/cultural scene. In the end, though, I think that it mostly works, giving us a raw yet (mostly) loving picture of the extended family dynamics that drove one of the truly original and great rock groups.

It's clear, though, that Mickey is still a bit bitter about some of that family history. He grinds a pretty hard axe on Joey at numerous points during the book, and there were times that it threatened to derail the narrative. The photo section is also inexcusably weak. Surely Mickey could have opened the family vaults just a little bit so as to give us a more intimate look at what his text was describing.

Overall I believe that this was a worthwhile effort and something that would be worth having if you're a fan of the band or of punk rock in general. Keep in mind that this is written from Mickey's perspective, and as such it's biased. I did get the impression that Mickey truly loved Joey, and wants this book to validate that fact.

Legs McNeil contributed a lot of material to this book, and his involvement helps to give the book added credibility. Legs co-founded 'Punk' magazine back in the day, thus giving a name and a definition to this budding music/social movement. He also wrote 'Please Kill Me', one of the definitive accounts of the development of New York punk.

Recommended.

"I Slept With Joey Ramone: A Family Memoir" is a beautifully written story which honors Joey Ramone as much as it tells his story. His life is a tapestry woven with sadness, joy, difficulties, success, and every possible emotion in between.

Mickey Leigh tenderly gives us the bare bones story of his brothers life leaving no stone unturned. From turbulent early years through drug additiction through success in the music industry we learn about the life of Joey Ramone first hand.

I didnt know him beforehand, but played with Mickey at a reading in Brooklyn to promote the book. He seemed to me to be a warm, down-to-earth guy. After finishing the book I think he did a great job of weaving together his own personal story (which he knows people are less interested in) with the stories of his family, Jeff/Joey, the band and the whole scene, in a very personal style. I imagine it was very difficult for him to relive and write down all these events, all these years later. I grew up at about the same time and place as he, and really related to a lot of what he was saying. Further, I didnt feel, as some reviewers here have, that he was being self-serving or defensive or destructive. He doesnt come off as a saint, certainly, he admits his own less-then-perfect feelings and actions, but doesnt whitewash anyone elses either. Joey's canonization be damned, Mickey wanted to tell the story as he saw it. The final portrait is of a not-uncommon family situation were siblings fight with siblings over (in retrospect) stupid things, where parents favor one child over another and, in the end, where everyone realizes how much family means to them. The ending of the book is pitch-perfect, bringing the reader to tears and not extending the story one word longer than necessary. Highly recommended.