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Smart Women/Foolish Choices: Finding the Right Men Avoiding the Wrong Ones (Signet) Mass Market Paperback – March 4, 1986


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Product Details

  • Series: Signet
  • Mass Market Paperback: 304 pages
  • Publisher: Signet (March 4, 1986)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0451158857
  • ISBN-13: 978-0451158857
  • Product Dimensions: 4.3 x 0.9 x 6.8 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 8 ounces
  • Average Customer Review: 4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (25 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #303,188 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Very concise, easy to read and well-written.
Lorrie Irby
I also had misconceptions on what a good relationship was supposed to be like.
Hopefull
Learn how to break the pattern and prevent it in your own life!
Amazon Customer

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

57 of 62 people found the following review helpful By Lorrie Irby on May 15, 2002
Format: Mass Market Paperback
This is a valuable book on how to gage erroneous, futile mechanisms and thought processes that keep women in hopeless mindsets and equally hopeless relationships. These two licensed professional counselors are men themselves, and their experience and professional knowledge bring much enlightenment to the mystery of men's behavior in relationships. I highly recommend this book to those who have been led to falsely believe that all men are commitment-phobic slugs and want validation to seek emotionally mature men that embrace confident, mature women for what they bring to the union. It offers tips on how ladies can come into their own power and to take assured chances with the opposite sex. Very concise, easy to read and well-written.
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42 of 45 people found the following review helpful By Barbara Rose VINE VOICE on April 11, 2004
Format: Mass Market Paperback
Connell Cowan, Ph.D. is an outstanding psychologist who has co-written this book with Dr. Melvin Kinder to bring women awareness of self-sabotaging patterns, hidden dependency needs, how men respond to women in power, differentiating between "the nice guy" and the exciting men that cause misery for women, breaking old patterns that cause pain, getting in touch with illusions, letting go of expectations, and much more.

This is a TIMELESS book that will help all women that are so adept in other areas of their lives become SMART with dignity, authenticity, and self respect, as you learn to honor yourself, as well as honor a relationship worth keeping, or leaving.

I bought this book when it first came out. The pages are now golden yellow, and I recommend this book for the golden advice and practical wisdom that any smart woman can use if you have been in one painful relationship after another. A great book to re-read as you learn and grow in relationships. This is an outstanding book to help you honor yourself and uncover patterns that have caused you pain, while you learn how to bring out authenticity within yourself and the man you are with.
HIGHLY RECOMMENDED!
Barbara Rose, author of "Stop Being the String Along: A Relationship Guide to Being THE ONE" and 'If God Was Like Man'
Editor of inspire! magazine
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36 of 38 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on May 2, 2001
Format: Mass Market Paperback
This book is full of realistic scenarios and information. It's true; we're never going to get away from it that men and women are simply different. While a woman's inclination with a man she likes is to go ahead and call, send a card, things like that . . . it just ins't a good idea in a dating relationship. Although I would not say the authors advocate manipulation or games, this one piece of advice could not have been stated better. I've seent this advice in other places, and tossed it aside, thinking . . . I'd rather not play games. They back it up with solid scientific reasoning. The book also discusses what men fear and why they fear; what they need but can't quite say they need. And it also discusses certain behaviors of women that are merely self destructive. And at all times, I thought the book was respectful toward women; for example, when discussing certain topics that might seem unfair toward women, this was acknowledged. The section on how to spot the wrong guys was, however, not so well developed. I'd like to see this covered in more detail. I'd like information on how to spot the con artist! That's the weakest section of the book. I first bought this book in my twenties and recently bought it again--a full decade later, realizing as I read, that had I been following some of this advice for hte last decade, I might have had a different sort of decade. Oh well. Live and learn. Good book.
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15 of 16 people found the following review helpful By Hopefull on April 24, 2006
Format: Mass Market Paperback
I went about my life wondering why men had such power over my life and emotions, despite the fact that I have many accomplishments under my belt and am a smart career woman.

Until I read this book I did not realise that I had emotional needs I was expecting another person to meet. These needs overpowered my judgement when chosing the right guy. I also had misconceptions on what a good relationship was supposed to be like. I thought feeling anxious was normal.

This book helped me figure out why I felt the way I did for many years, and now I have control of my life. As I read the book I felt lots of excitement, because I was discovering that things can be different, and this was the knowledge that would lead me to a happier life.

I would really like to thank the authors for enlightening me, and for their empathetic tone.

Examples on how to change would have been very helpful.
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7 of 8 people found the following review helpful By Marisa C. on February 25, 2006
Format: Mass Market Paperback
Just a great book showing all of the choices women can make, why we sometimes make the wrong ones without realizing it, and to learn how to make better ones without sacrificing our dignity. The book gives great examples to learn from!
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9 of 12 people found the following review helpful By B. Lowe on March 7, 2006
Format: Mass Market Paperback
After reading this book my first thought was, Where was this book years ago when i really needed it? perhaps it's never too late to dissolve self destructive patterns. My father was killed when i was young setting the course for a lifetime of bad choices. My destructive behavior began in college when took up cohabitation with an older man looking for that father figure. I compounded that fiasco by marring him. after reading this book and others i have become painfully aware that the first step to taking my life back is acknowledging the choices i have made and why I made them.
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