Customer Reviews

Snapshots In Memory Of Ben

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At first I was too frightened to read this book -- a true story of every parent's worst nightmare -- the death of his child. But somehow the author brings me in, with a kind of tenderness, truthfulness, parent's humbleness and a graceful way of writing about religious questions without weighing the story down in any way. His spiritual approach is so fresh-hearted that I can't help being lifted -- at least while I'm reading this -- to his poetic and poignant way of experiencing the world.

I found the book to be very moving...a book written from inside knowledge of what grieving is all about...it's not in the words people say to comfort you, but in the silence as they sit with you...saying nothing...but they are there. Most people don't understand that...they are compelled to say something "smart"...there is nothing smart or comforting in the loss of a loved one. There is only learning to live with the pain. And once in awhile...however brief, perhaps a funny memory that allows you to smile instead of cry at the memory
You did a wonderful thing by writing this for your son and yourself...and your other children.

This is one person's account losing a precious child and how this young man had influenced the lives of his father and those around him. Beautifully written from the heart of his father and guarenteed to bring tears to your eyes.

Many books have been written about a mother's loss of a child. Alan Busch offers a reflection of heartache told by a loving father. Though "Snapshots in memory of Ben," he relates his love, pride and respect for his "bechor," first-born child. Alan writes,"We set him apart . . . not because we love him more--but only that his childhood begins when ours ends." Snapshots," while heartwrenching, is so exquisitely written that it takes one's beath away at times. As a mother who also lost a child, Alan's perspective on his feelings have helped me better understand my own husband's grief. This narrative of lost love flows from deep within the writer's soul, which speaks so much more elequently than the mind. Expect to feel sadness, but you will receive so much more from this remarkable tribute from a father to his "bechor," Ben.

by Micki Peluso, author of . . .AND THE WHIPPOOORWILL SANG

This deeply moving account of the loss of a child reminds us that grief is not limited. While those around us hope things return to normal, it is clear that normal has changed dramatically and we may not even know what that will be. When everyone has returned to work, school, or their lives those with the loss still live it every second they are awake and perhaps more. Grieving such a loss is a long term event, needing support and understanding for much longer than we recognize. Alan helps us gently to remember the loss is on going, perhaps equivalent to a hole in our soul and while the acute pain may ease, the hole is permanent. Wonderful book, rich in traditions and educational about the impact of such a deep, deep, loss.
Nancy Petersen RN