Customer Reviews

So Hard to Say

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This novel fills an important niche in young-adult literature, telling the story of one boy's coming out experience through his own eyes and from the perspective of one of his close friends at school. Frederick is just starting the eighth grade as a new student at a California middle school. During his first week he meets Xio, a girl of Mexican descent who is immediately attracted to his "kick-butt blue eyes and sandy blond hair spiked in front." Xio and her girlfriends welcome Frederick into their circle, with Xio clearly thinking of him as boyfriend material. But what does Frederick himself want? At first even he is not sure.

Alex Sanchez writes "So Hard To Say" using the alternating viewpoints of his two main characters, Xio and Frederick. Their individual voices are distinct and go a long way toward establishing them as vivid, identifiable people. Xio is outgoing, sometimes brash. Frederick is circumspect, more shy around boys than he is with girls. He also becomes confused as he realizes that Xio is gradually turning up the heat, trying to nudge him into becoming a proper boyfriend for her.

Someone who causes a different kind of confusion for Frederick is Victor, the charismatic boyfriend of one of the girls in Xio's circle. Frederick doesn't quite know what to make of the easygoing attention he gets from Victor, who like many of the boys at Frederick's new school is not afraid to be physically affectionate with another guy. Victor regularly throws his arm around Frederick, nudges into him when they're walking together, puts him into playful headlocks, and at one point even picks him up to throw him onto a bed. As time passes, Frederick finds himself thinking more and more about Victor. He is fascinated by how the other boy's muscular build contrasts with his own, slighter one, and he frames a photograph of the two of them togther and places it at his bedside. He even allows Victor to call him by a nickname ("Rico"), something that nobody else is allowed to do. At first Frederick rationalizes his interest in Victor by noting that other boys at the school also defer to him. It is not until later that Frederick comes to realize that his own feelings go to different depths than theirs.

A peripheral character for most of the story is Iggy, another boy at Frederick's school who is rumored to be gay. Frederick overhears how others talk about Iggy and watches as they treat him like an outcast, so his own initial reaction is one of keeping a wary distance. All the same, he is fascinated by Iggy's dimpled smile and feels mysteriously drawn to him. What keeps him from acting on those feelings is mainly the fear of being thought of as gay himself.

Of course, with pressure from Xio to be her boyfriend and his feelings for Victor only becoming stronger, something in Frederick has to give. During the last part of the book he finally gets a chance to be honest with Xio and to come to terms with Iggy. The book ends on a hopeful note.

In the story teen readers will recognize many familiar artifacts from their own world -- computers, MTV, Playstation 2, instant messaging, email -- although, curiously, cell phones don't enter into the mix. Teens will also recognize many of the issues they themselves deal with in their everyday lives -- unrequited attraction, divorce, the challenge of how to balance the desire to be popular with your sense of what's right and wrong.

At times the character of Frederick tilts perilously close to that of the stereotypical weak, effeminate gay kid (he has "milky white skin", a "pouty mouth", suffers from asthema, and dabbles in interior design) but at the same time he is not afraid of sports and does quite well playing the goalie position in his first soccer game with Victor. I also like how the author takes the reader on a vivid tour of Mexican-American culture, making it a key part of the characters' lives. I think it is great that Wisconsin native Frederick is the odd man out, yet eagerly embraces the new experiences that his California friends offer as they welcome him into their lives.

Sexual content is limited to a scene of necking at the movies, some kissing between various boys and girls, and a kiss between two boys. Parents or teachers may want to discuss the book with very young readers as they make their way through, but I think most teens will be able to handle the material.

I just can't say enough good things about Alex Sanchez. I have had the opportunity to meet the author on a few occasions as he swings through Orlando and I must say that getting to know his books is truly getting to know him.

Although his previous books have been about gay youth, this story moves back to junior high, reminding me of all the wonderfully painful moments and realizations made during that time. Fredrick and Xio are two brilliantly written characters who could walk right out of the book they seem so real. There is some very subtle humor written into the plot as Fredrick realizes he is gay and his friend Xio becomes more and more frustrated until the realization hits her as well. A story many of us know all too well. Although the book is written for a much younger audience, I have thoroughly enjoyed reading the story, remembering my perspective as a 13 year old. I suspect there will be a follow up to this book as there are just too many possibilities for the transition of this cast as they move into high school.

I don't think I got as involved with this book as I did Rainbow Boys and Rainbow High, but again, it wasn't written with me in mind. I am looking forward to the follow up in the Rainbow series sometime next year.

Frederick has just moved to California from Wisconsin. His first day of school he meets Xio. They immediately become fast friends and she introduces him to her friends called "the sexies". As they become closer it is obvious that Xio wants to be more than friends. Frederick likes her but for some reason he is not feeling the same attraction. So starts this book where one of the main characters (Frederick) battles back and forth wondering why I am not attracted to this young lady but yet when he sees one of his classmates Victor he daydreams about him. It is a coming of age book where each individuals have to face grown up facts. Frederick that this feeling he has makes him a strong candidate of being homosexual, and Xio who has to come to terms with her father leaving the family and her father too possibly being gay. Great read.

A well-hewn story illuminating the subtle gradations involved in coming out, So Hard to Say takes on the challenging task of one 13-year-old boy's progress from childhood to manhood.

Frederick is a typical middle-school student dealing with the maze of finding friends, wanting a girlfriend (maybe Xio, a forward classmate who adores him) and trying to understand his role in a rapidly-changing role.

As he explores his feeling for Xio's friend Victor, a confident, handsome, fair-minded athlete, he slowly comes to realize it's not Xio he loves. On the scene is Iggy, an outwardly gay youth who is tormented at school.

While it might sound like a typical young-adult novel, it certainly is not. Author Alex Sanchez thought this through throughly before writing. The evolution of emotions blossoms perfectly, revealing growth and its counterbalancing immaturity at the same time. Most writers wouldn't take on the story of such a young teen's coming out. But Sanchez does it with incredible skill and inimitable grace.

The Kindle ebook formatting for this book was either badly proofread or never proofed. Otherwise, the publisher would have caught very, very frequent lack of spaces between every few words, such that the words runtogether and after a few more words, yet another two words runtogether. My guess is that this is an end-of-line problem in the conversion process. I would hope it isn't in the printed book. The publisher really needs to correct this. It's terribly annoying, and it means no one proofed the results for quality control. How embarrassing!

Alex Sanchez' book itself is probably great. I'll either slog through the ebook or order it in print. His book, The God Box, was very good. The ebook formatting detracts from what is likely a fine story.

Ye who has not written a children's book raise your right hand!

In the age of saturation-and shameless saturation at that-there appears to be not a soul left on planet Earth who has not penned a book for children or young adults. From television show hosts to pop music queens, and from B-movie actors to rowdy political pundits, everyone (particularly the celebrity circuit) has something to say, a lesson to impart, an age to memorialize. Can the success of J.K. Rowling and her Harry Potter books have been so effortlessly winning as to inspire an onslaught of dollars-grabbing children's literature on self-acceptance, acceptance of others, stealing, envy, greed, and lying, among other topics?

With much to vie for the attention of consumers these day, and especially young adults (videos and video games, the Internet, the fickle fashion industry, the even more fickle music industry), children's lit has turned into a money chomping machine of its own by turning books into films, and films into a sea of endless merchandising. It is of no amazement if one is left wondering if there really are any substantive lessons being imparted in all these books.

Then there arrives a work like Alex Sanchez's So Hard to Say, and all suspicions are immediately pushed aside. Infectious from the very first paragraph, the author of the highly successful books Rainbow Boys and Rainbow High has again struck gold with a story that is as original and heartwarming as it is insightful and heartbreaking.

At the plot's center are two likeable protagonists. Maria Xiomara Iris Juarez Hidalgo, nicknamed Xio (pronounced C.O.), who is a Leo (like Madonna), is also a plucky, feisty, and funny thirteen year old Mexican-American. Uniquely constructed, chatty Xio is a strong and opinionated chica, who is also by turns insecure and doubtful about the direction of her future. She lives with her mother and younger brother, and feels abandoned by a father who has left the family under mysterious circumstances. On the first day of class, she befriends-and immediately develops a crush on-new student Frederick (not Fred or Freddy or Rick or Ricky), who is a recent Wisconsin transplant to California. They strike up a fast friendship that has deeper implications for Xio. Frederick, on the other hand, is a thoughtful and deliberate fourteen year old, and by turns himself insecure and trepidatious regarding his choices in life. After all, he is experiencing waves of strong emotions that leads him to question his sexuality; he believes he's gay.

While this may sound like a simplistic story (girl meets boy who wants boy), its masterful, sensitive, and intricate execution delivers an admirably satisfying book. Sanchez, a naturally gifted writer who has been twice nominated for a Lambda Book Award, has also created impressive characters who hold up mirrors to the reader, yet are well drawn enough to be individualistic.

Nearly everyone in So Hard to Say, particularly the teen characters, act and react to everything on two levels: intellectually and emotionally, making them the most balanced constructions in recent memory. Case in point: when heartthrob Victor-Frederick's soccer buddy-is confronted with a rumor regarding Frederick's sexuality, he strokes his chin and insightfully ponders the situation, despite his sometimes rowdy and machismo behavior. When Xio is faced with hard truths about her father, she acts out forcefully, but then is adult enough to later sit and discuss her feelings openly with her mother. Frederick's evolution is never more apparent than when faced with a test: should he openly befriend the handsomely dimpled Iggy, who everyone believes is gay, and who gets very little respect from anyone. Even family.

The skillful shifting between thought and emotion, adolescence and maturity, light and heavy moments, and even English and Spanish, makes So Hard to Say easy to digest. Sanchez's ability to move the story along and tighten its dramatic tension without resorting to sensationalism is also remarkable. Everything-and everyone-remains in the realm of plausibility, even as the book moves through character and plot development, and introduces Xio and Frederick's variously colored circle of friends and family.

Poignant and brave at its conclusion, So Hard to Say will leave audiences with warm, lasting impressions of both its subtle lessons and its characters, of whom one can't wait to meet again. Which is saying much, because in the age of saturation-and shameless saturation at that-readers young and old will probably be left cheering three little words to Alex Sanchez: más, más, más. Which in English means more, more, more.

Alex Sanchez is probably most famous for the Rainbow Boys trilogy, a series of books that followed three boys whose maturity and search for self-understanding made the books so remarkable. Here, though, with So Hard To Say, Frederick is only 13, and the true beauty of this piece is that he is so immature and naive, and not even actively trying to find himself. I have read plenty of books where, upon discovering the protagonist's sexuality, the girlfriend becomes a scorned, shrill caricature. Xio is nothing if not totally lovable and compassionate. The Sexies are a pretty funny group of girls, not unlike cliques you'd meet in any school, but definitely a bit sassier than most. It's arguable that the true star of this book would really be Xio, because her struggle to trust in Frederick, adapt to a lifestyle she's never seen before, not betray her friend, and grapple with "loving" him rings really true. It's definitely worth reading, it is really heartwarming, but not just as a "gay novel", but as a story about friendship and compassion.

"So Hard To Say," Alex Sanchez's book is a rite of passage novel and it's chock-a-block full of the melodrama and angst of adolescence. While protagonist Alex struggles with self-discovery, so do the rest of the cast of early adolescents (and sometimes their parents) as they come face-to-face with new "facts of life." Surely author Sanchez's book is a boiling demonstration of the reason YA literature has often been tagged, "The Problem Novel."

In the opening pages of the work, Frederick's best friend and wannabe girl friend, Xio, are troubled about their relationship: she wants it to be stronger and committed; he seeks the thrill of holding her hand and the courage to kiss her. Although his male peers have convinced him of the desirability of such interaction. Frederick's sole experiences in that arena have come from Xio's aggression - and he has been sorely disappointed. To make matters worse, Frederick views his lack of excitement as a sign of effeminacy and that he may be gay. His fears are heightened by the pressure of younger boys who taunt and ridicule him, a fate that seems likely to be his at the same time a new boy appears in school, befriends Frederick, and involves him in the soccer team. Furthermore, he is unable to fight off what is surely a sign that he is falling love with the boy.

Author Sanchez's great writing talent lies in his ear; he hears the inner mental working of early teens and reproduces their speech perfectly. The dialogue is crisp and clean and is precisely as adolescents would say it; illogical pronouncements and all.

Just as his "ear" for language is masterful, so author Sanchez is equally able at the character development of the protagonists in his story. That skill too sets up the background and story for the main characters and their conflicts.

In the YA market, "So Hard to Say" is a welcome addition, a five star entry with others certain to follow. I wholeheartedly recommend this book for YA and Adult readers

This was a really good book! it was funny at parts! and it is very recommended

So Hard To Say is a fantastic book. It can teach people a valuable lesson about moving some where and discovering yourself. I have read this book 3 times and every time I read it I understand each character more .This book not only reveals the internal story of each character but the external as well. I really recommend this book to everyone and i hope they like it.